


High School Drama Bullshit

by RoleplayFanfics



Series: The worst modern Star Wars AU [1]
Category: Star Wars - All Media Types
Genre: AU, Alternate Universe - High School, Anakin is a shit, Angsty teen bullshit, Ben Solo Needs A Hug, Ben Solo is damned possessive, Crackfick, Emo Kylo Ren, F/F, F/M, Family Drama, Fluff and Humor, Fluff and Smut, Gen, Good taste of music, High School, Humor, Hux should be less of a desperate idiot, It's not a phase mom, Luke Skywalker on a farm, Luke is a loner that hates people, M/M, Memes, Multi, New Star Wars, Obi-Wan Needs a Hug, Other, Over the top bullshit, Polyamory, Ren is a mess, Ren is the worst fucking mess, Rey punching Kylo Ren, Roleplay, Roleplay Logs, Rose Tico is too precious, Rose is too excited, Ruining your view of Star Wars characters, Shameless Shipping, Skywalker Family Drama, Skywalker Family Feels, Star Wars - Freeform, Star Wars References, Weird family dinners, What the fuck is Leia's and Han's relationship anyway, angsty teens, bullshit
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-04-04
Updated: 2019-01-24
Packaged: 2019-04-18 07:24:17
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 8
Words: 78,380
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14208108
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RoleplayFanfics/pseuds/RoleplayFanfics
Summary: The result of an hour's shower discussion about the dumbest ideas of a modern Star Wars AU we could think of. We literally lost all capability of making this serious, we're not sorry. A para-post roleplay log of Star Wars bullshit, shameless shipping and angsty teens.Part of the worst and most dear Star Wars AU we have created, so far."Armitage Hux was someone that Ren probably would tolerate a lot less if he had the energy to give a fuck about him. The tall and black haired man that was currently a little too pissed off to not care. He probably would never have noticed the existence of the ginger boy if it wasn’t for that Phasma was, under circumstances, not Ren’s enemy, since those two would never not end up neutral, it was either with each other or against each other, in the war-scape that was the school grounds."





	1. Dear Diary: Ren is a shithead

**Author's Note:**

> Now, this AU is going to consist of a bunch of roleplay logs, mostly revolving around different ships and characters and dumb scenarios. 
> 
> This specific one is the one for the relationship developing between Armitage Hux and Ben Solo. And pugs. There will be pugs. 
> 
> Ren/Ben Solo is played by Nathan, Armitage Hux is played by Teddy.

[Ren]

  
All things considered, he had probably been a little too shocked to properly feel the impact of the punch, as the knuckled hand hit his cheek, which, by the way, was the only reason, whatsoever, that someone managed to knock Ren off his feet; it would have been entirely impossible, had she not taken him off guard.    
  
She.    
  
Rey was apparently her name, weird fucking name, but then again, it was kind of badass in a strange way, just the way that Ren had this unique characteristic to it. Pretty badass. He had briefly wondered if it was her birth name.    
  
It wasn’t Ren’s fault, none of it, really; there was no way for him to predict that the girl would be such an ungrateful bitch. Really, all he had done was suggesting they’d hang out, which is pretty damn kind of him, to offer the new one a chance to hang with the stronger people; that oddball, dressed in her blandly colored, probably vegan-fabric, rags, who the other kids stared at strangely, seemed to need it; anyway, Ren of all people shouldn’t perhaps be the one to comment on what people was wearing, but eh. Besides, they were in the same class, since school started, barely a month ago, and she was evidently pretty fucking dense. Not only was she dense, but she seemed like a stubborn fuck who just kept insisting that she didn’t need any help, and that she would figure it out. Fucking Hell, the chick was holding half the class back with her stubbornness and need to hear everything twice. He could just help her, if that was what she needed; Hell, it was half the reason he had approached her. The shit they were taught in school was still not things challenging him, meaning that despite not having the best attendance, or reputation, his grades were pretty damn good. Ren had always been the type of person to catch onto things pretty easily, and it was quite easy to remember the shit they were taught in school, meaning that he rarely took notes, or studied, but rather just performed the minimal amount of work that had to be done to pass with his desired grade. He handed the assignments in, held the speeches, participated in the debates, took the exams, and did rather damn well, most of the time. Teaching the new girl wouldn’t be that much trouble, and well, since he was curious, it was a good way to start getting to know her, a little bit.    
  
“ _ You need a teacher.” _   
  
Rey had looked at the tall young man approaching her as if she was a cornered animal, threatening towards him, on edge, uncomfortable; Hell, he hadn’t done anything to deserve that damn reaction. Sure, people found the slightly overgrown and evidently strong teenager that was Ren rather intimidating, that was never news to him. However, she didn’t seem like the sort of pussy that would be scared of him just approaching. Rather, she just looked… offended? He didn’t phrase the words badly, he didn’t think so. Instead, the stubborn bitch kept on rejecting him, and not in any kind fashion, at that; fuck, she was rude.    
  
It wasn’t Ren’s fault that someone had to put her in place, just a little. No matter whatever he said, however, the girl just barked back at him. He didn’t quite know for how long they argued, but this conversation was way longer than fucking necessary and her words didn’t even make any fucking sense. At least, Ren was sensible enough to use some logical reasoning to why she shouldn’t be so damn hostile. Somewhere along the road, he snapped, just a little, but really, she had it coming. A large hand slammed into the lockers, where he had caught her, just striking up a conversation, but then again, by the time the sound of the locker being hit rung out in the hall enough to gain attention from onlookers he supposed that he was actually cornering Rey. When had he raised his voice so much? He couldn’t recall when it happened.    
  
“I take whatever I want, you know;” Ren had more or less hissed the words, and how the Hell he managed to raise his voice over the crowd when hissing was a mystery to each and every onlooker.    
  


**Smack.**   
  
What the fuck was that smell on the floor tiles, fucking disgusting. They were cold, surprisingly nice given the cheek of Ren’s, that pressed up against it, was stinging in an awfully painful fashion, almost pulsating. Fuck, that punch was hard, and his head was spinning. Worst of all, it took embarrassingly long to even figure out what exactly had happened. Once he figured out, the embarrassment he felt was immediately hidden with the furious look on is face, as he was up in a second, but by then, the girl was nowhere to be seen. Instead, the enraged teenager spun around and glared at the closest onlookers. People were already scattering before Ren spoke up, no one wanted to be close to the black-clad young man when he was aggressive and unpredictable like that, everyone in school knew that fact. Hence, when he managed somewhere in between hissing and roaring out “what the fuck are you looking at,” to a few poor students that hadn’t been quick enough to scatter, the remaining onlookers started minding their own business again.    
  
Later, during math class, his headphones blasted Ghost’s new album loudly enough to probably disturb class a little, but their old math teacher was rather hard of hearing, and she didn’t seem to mind, besides, he sat in the back of the class. It’s not like he couldn’t see the front from there, and he would probably block the view for someone if he sat further in front. He was second tallest in all of the school, after all, and with the steel-plated, black and military-style boots he was wearing, he was definitely the tallest, given the platform they had.    
He was furious, and it was probably visible, which was why not even his friends wanted to bother him, seeing that mostly everyone and anyone was scared of Ren when he was pissed. Only a few would dare.    
  
His cheek fucking hurt. There was this huge bruise forming, and really, had he had time he might have even hidden it with makeup, but he didn’t carry that sort of stuff with him in school. Besides, the wound was brutal, for such a small and fragile-looking thing being the cause. He supposed the baggy rags she wore hid what a damn power package she seemed to be. Fucking cheat. At least Ren was clear about his own strength. His tight fitting, black shirt from Killstar showed of most of his muscles, and the tattoo on his left wrist. The skinny jeans did the rest of showing that he was fucking brutally strong, at least in compared to the other kids, or at least, according to himself. 

  
The bruise was ugly, which was probably what led Phasma to scorn at him right after the last period ended, knowing well that he was pissed, and the risks of talking to Ren right then.    
  
“Why the fuck did you let her down you on the floor? It’s pathetically unfit.” Snob, was really the first thought that Ren had to that. It was all too evident that monster of a blonde girl had a speech pattern affected by her snob of a younger brother, and by their fancy little family. It was like she couldn’t make up her mind whether to be down to earth or all prissy, and it was pissing the black haired male off a lot, as of the moment.    
  
“You hadn’t seen it fucking coming. Besides, if she didn’t know what she was doing, I wouldn’t be colored all blue and purple,” he spat at her, glaring intently.    
  
“Sure you didn’t get the bruise from hitting the floor?” Phasma spat back, obviously not convinced, and definitely mocking him. Fucking-...    
  
“Fuck no, I wouldn’t fall without catching myself properly, I’d be dead in a ditch somewhere if I hadn’t learnt that,” he pointed out, still oozing with irritation and anger, but as per usual, his argument made sense. Then again, it felt rather good to banter with Phasma, because she wasn’t scared, like everyone else were scared. It was a pretty decent way to let off steam. They got to the lockers, and Ren did not admit to himself that he was absentmindedly glancing around to check if Rey was in fact around, but apparently no, she was not. He just wanted to fucking punch her in return, no silly ‘not hitting girls’ bullshit, she definitely could handle a goddamn punch.    
  
Fuck it, slowly but surely, the anger oozed out a little, as if it was sipping out through his pores, just vaporizing in the air, like a good smoke, fuck, he needed a smoke,  and Ren returned to be his regular unpleasant and on edge persona. His face still stung, the bruise was fucking nasty and it got worse the more of the day passed.

 

 

[Hux] 

Brendol Hux was a military man through and through. He had worked hard, tirelessly to raise in the ranks and promote his new program for a new generation of super soldiers. The man valued power over everything else, to be strong, smart and above everyone else, no matter what means one had to use. He asked for nothing but the best of himself and everyone around him. His son, Armitage Hux, was asked even more than that; he had to be brilliant. 

The younger Hux, however, lacked a lot of the qualities that his father treasured. He had always been below average in height until this very summer, where he had had a growth spurt, sending him up to an impressive 1,85 meters. Or, well, it was impressive for someone who had barely reached 1,67 before summer. Needless to say, it was somewhat hard to get adjusted to his new height, especially in school where a few things were a lot smaller than he remembered. His body, however, seemed to lack all muscles, bony and weak like a corpse. Definitely not built as an athlete or a soldier. 

Phasma, his adoptive sister, on the other hand, had everything that their father treasured. Strong, powerful, built like a human tank. Sometimes, Hux couldn’t help but wonder if Brendol Hux had wanted to leave him at the Orphanage where the man had adopted his sister. The only thing she lacked was the will to study, it wasn’t that she was stupid, she just… didn’t really care as much about brain power. 

The ginger male always studied, always worked hard to stay on top of the class, no matter the cost. To his tiny circle of ‘friends’, they knew him to always be busy and a study-nerd. Hux had many times pointed out that being a study-nerd wasn’t really a thing, one usually didn’t use that way to explain it but they had kept on insisting that word worked for him. Finally, he had just given up, leaving them be. 

This day had been rather uneventful, it creeped by as always and as always; math class started. Hux was seated rather far in the room, so that he could easily see the whiteboard, his books already full of complicated equations, numbers and letters. It wasn’t too long until he heard heavy footsteps and when lifting his head slightly, he saw the menace himself coming stomping through the classroom. Ben Solo, known to everyone at school as simply ‘Ren’, came walking, dressed in his usual, somewhat tight fitting clothing that worked so very well on his body. They revealed the muscles on his arms and thighs, giving his rump the perfect amount of room to make it look round and plush. Hux didn’t like him, in fact, he loathed the man above everything else but… One had to admit that Ren’s body did have some strong points. 

Oh yes… The worst thing about Armitage Hux? He liked men. 

The ginger had worked so hard to hide it, especially from his father, but also everyone else. He didn’t want to admit it to himself either but it was a lot harder to trick himself that he liked women when his eyes were drawn to other things. He had slipped up once, just one little mistake, that was all it took and he was condemned for all eternity. It had happened in the locker room, after P.E. Hux had always hated that class, it was so obvious that he wasn’t very athletic and when compared with males of his own age: yes, he was weaker and slower. Afterwards, they went to change and his eyes had strayed. One of the better built males had come out of the shower, dripping with water, his muscles clear under the skin. He had a stunning tan and the wetness had made his hair somewhat curly. He had been looking absolutely stunning and Hux had flushed a deep red, his body reacting to the sight when his mind screamed no. 

But it was too late. They noticed. Of course they did. 

Gay. Homo. Faggot. 

He had heard it all since that day, none of the guys in school coming close to him again. If it hadn’t been for his sister, he probably would have been bullied half to death, or beaten up every day… Hnn. Good thing that Phasma had decided to protect him. In all honesty, most of his ‘friends’ were just her friends who tolerated him. Meaning that he ended up around Ren a lot. 

Ren, who looked about to murder anyone who dared to speak to him. Oh… What was that on his… Cheek…? Oh, Ren had gotten punched? His otherwise attractive face was starting to turn blue… Damn. Who had managed to get him that bad? Suddenly, the day was a lot more interesting…

After the lesson, he walked behind Phasma and Ren as they bantered. It seemed like a girl had hit him, something that his sister was enjoying a lot and the man was angry about. Other than that, they were talking like always. Fighting like always. 

“Oh. The mighty Ren was floored by someone that isn’t my sister? Is there a monster more powerful than her?” Hux spoke up, looking straight at the male’s face as he turned around. 

Hux was dressed as far from the black haired as possible. His ginger hair was swept back, he a simple black dress shirt and a sleeveless  pullover sweater above it. He didn’t wear jeans but black chinos. His shoes were black and polished, looking as if he hadn’t walked even a meter in them. 

 

 

[Ren]

Armitage Hux was someone that Ren probably would tolerate a lot less if he had the energy to give a fuck about him. The tall and black haired man that was currently a little too pissed off to not care. He probably would never have noticed the existence of the ginger boy if it wasn’t for that Phasma was, under circumstances, not Ren’s enemy, since those two would never not end up neutral, it was either with each other or against each other, in the war-scape that was the school grounds. Phasma and her brother were more or less a package deal, and well, fucking lucky for that prissy fucking prick, that would probably be beaten half to death by now, if he couldn’t hide, like the little weak coward he was, behind his sister.

  
Ren just accepted that the little dweeb would be around the tough kids, like some protected little princess, just riding along with whatever his sister did. Ren was damned sure that he could take on Phasma any day, but someone might actually die then, which definitely wasn’t worth the bother. Was the tallest guy in school to beat the shit out of that little nerd he wouldn’t hear the end of it from Phasma, and she was nearly as stubborn as himself.    
  
It didn’t bother Ren so much, really, since he never had to care about that antisocial little prick. Until he spoke up. What the fuck did he just say? Well, the words weren’t the problem, it was that condescending tone of the brat.    
  
It took less than a second for the Killstar-clad male to be an inch from the other’s face-... without bending down? Hoh, that was new. Funny, they had been in school together for a month already, and it seemed that Ren had not quite noticed how tall Hux had gotten, seeing he never really paid attention to the ginger’s existence. Normally, was he to scare the little brat, he would have to bend down an awful lot, now however, even in his platform boots, he was just the right height to be threateningly towering over the other’s face without bending down. He wasn’t… fuming the same way, he was just pissed and annoyed. The ginger wasn’t worth the bother, he was too pathetic for that. Would Hux be a little more down to Earth and not so fucking delusional with his supposed ‘class’ Ren might have respected his words more. He didn’t care about shits who thought they were better than everyone else.    
  
“Aye, there’s a new monster in school, so you better be wary or she might come get when you can’t hide behind your sister,” it was a clear statement, but there was a cruel grin on Ren’s lips, clearly amused. It was a pretty good comeback, and he wasn’t even defending himself, or insulting the weakling for hiding behind his sister, all that was so easily understood, because the taller knew that the ginger wasn’t completely dense, like his sister could be at times. Normally he could have added something crueler, but Phasma was, after all, right next to Hux, and Ren could so easily insult the pathetic kid without having to even do it out loud.    
  
Hah, it felt pretty fucking good to know that Hux was the same weakling, even after a sudden growth spurt. Ren glanced over to see the hand that was holding the side of Phasma’s sweater, his smile widening, making a silent point of the gesture, eyes fastening back to look down at Hux.

 

 

 

[Hux] 

One would have expected that Hux would have learned to not mess with Ren, but it was just so easy, to insult or make him angry… The one thing that he could so easily do, that was so obviously a fault. To shatter the fact that Ren was good at everything, to prove to himself that he was better at something than the other male. It was so satisfying, to watch as the facade of power and control just cracked and peek at the freak underneath. At least Hux could control himself, something Ren couldn’t. 

The little smugness that he had felt disappeared as soon as Ren invaded his personal space. Strangely enough, the black haired was the only male that actually came closer to him, no one else did that in fear of the ‘gay-germs.’ Yet it wasn’t flattering at all, it was just uncomfortable. Especially since it made his body felt hot and shaky… No, he wasn’t excited or anything… definitely NOT turned on by having a raging madman in his face. Would Ren touch him this time? Would he grab his shirt or push him? He wasn’t excited by the thought but… part of him wanted to know what it felt like to have contact from another male. 

The better part of him however, knew that he wasn’t trusting the man this close, and there was no truth in daydreams about the touch not being violent and hurting. He wasn’t that stupid. Of course, he was scared of having a brute in his face! His hand moved without him realizing it, grabbing onto the only thing in the world that he could trust, that he knew would defend him. 

“...” He snorted as the man made that obvious threat, trying his best not to back away from him or look scared. There was a flicker of his eyes, he looked at the woman beside them, checking that she was there for him. She was and his eyes returned to the man. “Wouldn’t that make you happy? If the monster was to beat Phasma too, so that it wouldn’t be as obvious that you are weaker than her?” 

Then Ren gave him that look, looking at him as if he was a worm on the ground… Similar to how their father looked at him. Like he could be crushed under his heel. Hiding behind her… Weakling.

Weak. 

He bit down on his lower lip and moved to grab her arm instead. “We’re leaving. Shouldn’t keep the car waiting.” He walked before his sister, trying not to show just how annoyed he was. Rich kids, their father had a car that always came to get them and drive them there. That was how it had been for all their lives. Hux himself had no idea what it was like to walk or take the bus to school. He only knew the car, a prison, a safe zone where no one was looking as soon as the doors closed. 

He felt an itch, when they sat in the car, his fingers moved to his left sleeve, slinking inside. He was wearing gloves, very high gloves, that kept him from reaching the skin. It was itching… Damn. Just twenty minutes and he could scratch. Twenty minutes and they would be home. 

~~ 

Hux spent his time studying as he got home, working through page after page of his math book. Equation after equation… Numbers flowing from his pen, stopping only to drink water or make a cup of tea. 

The clock turned seven and he stood up from his desk, stretched and walked downstairs. The Hux family had three dogs, all three being pure breed pugs. They had the most beautiful black fur but other than that, Hux had always wondered why they didn’t own graceful dogs, but three molded potatoes. The pugs didn’t really like him all that much but they absolutely adored his sister. He found one laying inside her room, snoring on the carpet. 

After some searching, he got dressed in his black coat. It wasn’t that cold yet out yet but it seemed like a good idea to wear something. He tended to be overdressed most of the time and the fabric was rather thin. It would be fine. 

People tended to say that herding cats was an impossible task. Hux wonder if these people ever tried to walk three pugs. They stumbled around and waddled into everything that seemed interesting. They snorted and sneezed and sometimes, one refused to walk, then they had a stare down over what way they wanted to do. Once, they all wanted to sniff the same spot and ended up getting tangled in their collars. After that, they actually learned how to make a line. Then they forgot. 

They somehow, by the grace of God above, ended up in the dog park. Hux sighed lowly and let the pugs wander. Not outside of their leashes, of course. Just allowed them to waddle around. “...Yeah… dig a hole there and plant yourself… you might make more pug-tatoes…” He spoke to Phasma’s darling as he dug a little among the leaves. At least he was getting some fresh air… His brain needed that.

 

[Ren]

The angry young man glared daggers at the snob in front of him, listening to the pathetic excuse of an argument; Hux could wish that Ren was weaker than his sister all that he wanted, it would not make it true. Besides, the ginger looked pathetic when he clung to Phasma to make sure he was safe, upon Ren approaching him. The aggressive and taller man rolled his eyes at Hux’s words; this was just plain stupid. Rey hadn't even beaten him, she had just surprise attacked him and fled. He had already been clear about that to Phasma, meaning that Hux had heard him, meaning that this was wasting more of his already wasted time before getting out and getting a smoke, which he needed, fucking badly. 

The fucking prick had the stomach, as usual, to pretend he had the upper hand, with his sister as shield, as he scattered and fled the situation. Fucking finally. Ren shoved his locker door closed and the crowd in the corridor scattered so easily when he passed in the Hall, heading off school grounds to finally get a smoke. Hux’s comment was already forgotten, Rey’s punch was not.

~~

“You smell of smoke, it's repelling.”

No shit, Sherlock.

There was no way in Hell that Ren would head home that day, like, at all. It was one of those weeks where his father hadn't been seen for days at end, and it made his mother… agitated. She became even more suffocating and overbearing. Besides, Han Solo had likely just escaped to stay in his workshop, or headed out to uncle Luke, at his farm, and would return, sooner or later. He never actually had the stomach to flee, or well, perhaps he didn’t want to, Ren never really figured out what the fuck his parents were up to. He was quite sure that they loved each other, in some weird fucking way that probably had messed up part of what their kid’s view on relationship was, by now. Heck, Ren wasn’t used to normal relationships where the parents weren’t off fucking their best friend at times they fought, and still loved each other. It was… kind of badass, in a very weird fucking sense, to know that they cared for each other so much, in their own way, that it didn’t matter to his mother that her partner was fucking her brother the times they fought. Besides, Leia Organa always went to one of her old college friends, and Amilyn Holdo was pretty fucking badass, and more or less considered a part of the family. Sure, the Christmas dinners were weird, but it was at least a family, a real family, one that would never really abandon him; instead, he was the one fleeing every second he could. Fuck, he hated them, or at least, he was convinced that he did, except Amilyn, she was ok. They were all pretty fucking messed up, and most of all, they didn’t understand him, one bit.    
  
Ben Kenobi was no exception to Ren’s hatred. Who even had such a weird name…? Besides, they weren’t even fucking related, the man had just been partly his mother’s legal guardian, and written as relative, even if he wasn’t related to any of them. Rather, he was probably the ex boyfriend of Ren’s grandpa, that had just gotten close to the kids and stayed with the family. Yeah, weird relations, as mentioned, but he counted as family. Besides, Ren had obviously been named after this man, for reasons unknown to him, and he didn’t want to find out in particular what the old fart had that made his parents want his name to be the same lame one.   
  
The teenager wasn’t about to have a discussion about smoking with the grumpy senior he was facing in the hallway to the little apartment, instead, there was just a moment of their usual glare-down contest, that neither really won. There would be absolutely no point in arguing about this, since Ben had that attitude of that none of Ren’s arguments even mattered, since he was a child, evidently, and thus, the teenager just didn’t bother. Besides, it was a little difficult to hold an intimidation contest when he had to brace himself for the full force attack of five fur covered beasts wanting to share all the love and cuddles in the world with him. The dogs, that the old man owned, were mostly strays that Ben had picked up on the one occasion they had convinced the loner to take a vacation abroad, around the Mediterranean, and then decided that Ben Kenobi was never to take a vacation on his own, again. Although, Ren didn’t see the big problem, aside from the fact that the man was getting old, meaning that family members had to take responsibility to exercise the dogs, and seeing that the closest thing to a family the old loner had was the Skywalker-lineage, Ren found himself responsible for taking care of five excited dogs, a few times a week, in the late afternoons. Hell, he didn’t mind, actually, he quite liked it, and he enjoyed the company of the dogs. Besides, it was probably mostly due to him that the dogs were disciplined at all, they listened to him well enough to walk without collars, but it would still be someone filing a complaint if they saw these beasts of dogs walk without collars in the city. Ren was easily established pack leader, and walking them was very relaxing, somewhere when he got away from just everything and everyone.    
  
It was nearly seven, and he had been out eating with friends from another school, not coming home at all. His fake-grandpa, that Ben kind of was, at this point, would not even bother to ask if he had told his mother where he was or if he had been home, it just resulted in arguments, and besides, he would call Leia and tell him that Ren was whole and alive, and seemingly not high, at least of that moment. 

So, ignoring the commentary about his smoking, he started sorting out the leashes for the dogs and glared at the man that was observing him, from the other side of the hallway corridor. It was a small apartment, and that typical boring and old fashioned thing you’d expect from a senior that lived alone. All boring except that corner in the living room that had photos of Ren’s actual grandfather, that was dead. Darth Vader, or well, his actual name was Anakin Skywalker, had been part of a gang called Lords of Sith, a pretty fucking legendary gang, and to be completely fair, Ren had adored him most of his childhood and everything he heard. He sounded more than badass, and a lot more like someone he would get along with than this old fart. 

“... have you taken your medicine?” Ren spoke casually, after a longer break between the two. The man was old, he had a few prescriptions, like most seniors, and was horribly bad at remembering them.    
  
By the look on Ben’s face, it was all too evident that the man had forgotten, and Ren just rolled his eyes. On that note, once he was done with collaring the dog, he told them to sit, and they did, as he just stomped past the old man, who immediately objected to the fact that he hadn’t taken his boots off, but he didn't care. On the way back he had a box of beer cans with him, at least only one had been opened. He slammed the door closed with the dogs and the box before the man could even object, besides the man was to avoid alcohol, as an advice from the doctors, due to his heart medicine, meaning that Ren could take it, and he could not object. There was no real way for the senior to get back at him for it, because if he complained to Leia, she would agree with her son, on this one. Hell, more booze for him, for later, he supposed, he’d drop it off with a friend, before he walked longer. 

  
It was a rare occasion of a Friday without parties and stuff happening, meaning that the way he’d want to spend his time was alone, until he figured out where to stay the evening, and possibly the weekend.    
  
Once things were sorted, he just walked. It wasn’t particularly cold, but he was wearing a cardigan with a larger pentagram print on the back, making it all the more comfortable. When they reached the nearby park, Ren saw a sight that probably made up for all the shit he had been through the entire week. There was the little prissy ginger, trying to walk a mere three little lap dogs, or sad excuses of dogs anyway, and failing miserably, just by the look of it. What the-... hah. It was a glorious sight, really. Of course the kid wouldn’t know shit of how to command and lead, either. Even better, the little tragic examples of dogs noticed Ren and his own little pack, meaning that they got really excited and started pulling towards them. When Ren’s own dogs saw this, they evidently got a bit excited, and he simply commanded them to stay, and sit, and that they did, awaiting his command, hoping he’d tell them that they could approach and play. He didn’t, he just watched the other teenager struggle with his dogs, while calmly lighting another cigarette, his dogs calmly waiting for him.

 

 

[Hux] 

Hux didn’t walk the dogs, he… allowed them to chose the path to avoid them refusing to walk. If someone would have told him that he didn’t know how to handle his dogs, he would have told them that these poor balls of snot and farts were barely able of thinking, to order them around was impossible. When at the park, they usually got to drag him whatever way they wanted until he could pull them back home again. 

He noticed out of the corner of his eyes how a person with a real pack of big dogs entered the park. He only glanced to see if they were collared, which they were. They looked like they could eat his dogs for snack. Just in case, the male kept an eye on the dogs, not wanting one of the beasts to mistake his ducksquad for a squeaktoy. 

As they came closer, however, something nagged him. Something made this all feel… wrong… He glanced at the dogs again, trying to figure out why this uncomfortable feeling was pulling at his mind. Finally, the pugs noticed the potential friends who evidently had noticed them as well. They began to pull, when Hux wasn’t ready at all for them to do that. He was yanked along, his hair falling down over his face. He hadn't cared to keep it in place when working at home, many hours of frustration and math (in other words, pulling his hand through his hair). 

He managed to get them under control before they reached the pack, standing up and pulled the leashes back. He threw his head back a little, trying to get his hair out of his eyes, before looking up, spotting that the other person had no problem with his dogs at all. Something about the other was… familiar though… He raised his head further and… Froze. 

The owner of this happy dog family, was no one else than Ren, the Killstar-clad menace. He had dogs? He had five of them? And he could control them all… This was… He felt how his ears started to turn red in the somewhat chilly air as he raised his posture. The freak was looking at him, they were alone in a park (actually, they weren’t alone at all, but there was no one here that could protect him), Ren with beautiful beasts of animals and he with the three little piglets. No one was there to stop him if the taller wanted to hurt him but… there was also no one here that could hear them speak. N-not that he wanted to speak with Ren, they had nothing in common and they couldn’t stand one another. Why would they speak at all? 

The gangster looked at him with brown eyes, the light of the cigarette making Hux’s eyes move towards his slightly big but still… _ Gulp _ … Attractive lips. How calm he was… He clearly had full control over the animals around him. He looked just like he would in school… 

The rich kid quickly moved his head down, if they didn’t look at one another, maybe he could just keep on. Ren had of course recognized him, no way that he hadn’t… He glanced back at him again, the male was still looking at him, smoke calmly raising towards the sky from his lips. 

What to say to him…? The pugs pulled again and he ended up stumbling closer as one of them reached the first dog. He barked and lowered himself, trying to make the bigger dog play with him. “...H...h… Come back here…” He groaned and moved to pull them all back. Don’t look at him… don’t speak with him… don’t… Don’t look at me.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Had to end the chapter somewhere, have a little cliff hanger. 
> 
> \---- Facts and Headcanons ----
> 
> Ren:  
> So here was the joke, if he is supposed to be a superior user of the Force and such a talented individual with so much potential, all ruined by his behaviour and emotional ways, in the real Star Wars, we wanted to make him that sort of shit that gets away with being clever. Normally I'd be quite against playing someone with such a variety of talents, but it becomes a lot more funny and a better reference, that way, and doesn't make Ren less of a mess. It was also difficult to illustrate how he struggles with things the people around him would never quite understand, any other way than making it all weird.
> 
> Over the top:  
> Everything is supposed to be over the top and ways to twist Star Wars into silly references. Yes, we are writing this seriously, but the concepts will still be insanely over the top and stupid. This is the last warning we are giving of that.
> 
> Armitage Hux:  
> Strip the General of his role as General and see how well he does. This runs with the concept in the other AU story Capturing the General; when not within his element, Hux is not the best at neither socializing, nor managing people.
> 
> One clearly hates the other more:  
> Once, Adam Driver (Kylo Ren) and Dohmnall Gleeson (General Hux) were asked for a secret santa joke what the characters would have given each other for gifts. Kylo Ren wanted to give Hux socks every year, and Hux wanted to give Ren a bomb. This, if anything, illustrates how much stronger the hatred is for the other, within the General. 
> 
> Shower-man:  
> Yes, that man in the shower is definitely Poe Dameron. Yes, yes it is. 
> 
> Drawing the line:  
> We had to draw a line to the weirdness of names somewhere, and Obi-wan became that line. Now he's old uncle Ben Kenobi. 
> 
> Ducksquad:  
> The pugs are named after the duck brothers in the cartoon Ducktales; this of course, was Phasma's choice of names, when she was a child.


	2. Dear Diary: Ren was supposed to be a shithead, what the fuck is this

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Hux felt like someone had thrown cold water over him, leaving him breathless as well as speechless. Not to mention the way the man’s hands moved as he cared for them, scratching, patting and petting… He had never once seen anyone touch anything with such gentleness… 
> 
> ...Was he getting jealous of his DOGS for being patted by REN…? 
> 
> No. No. Nonononono."
> 
> Continuing the scenario where Hux walked into Ren in the park.

[Ren]  
Did that kid have anything at all together, whatsoever? Maybe Ren wasn’t exactly the one to speak, there, but at least he could do shit on his own, and managed on his own, no matter what he went through. He highly doubted that his rich dweeb of a classmate had to, or could, accomplish anything on his own, at least Ren had never seen any evidence pointing towards such a conclusion. At least his grades were decent, but then again, that nerd studied all the time, and was evidently not catching onto things as fast as the taller of the two.

This was really fucking grand, especially given how the day had been, earlier, and Hux’s snazzy little comments. Hell, the assumed gangster, which he would never agree to being, could nearly smell out fear as well as the dogs he was walking; the kid was terrified of him, now that he couldn’t hide behind his meatshield of a sister.

They didn’t really have anything to talk about, of fucking course, because Hux had never once showed a sign of being interested in anything Ren or their other friends ever said, so the taller of the two had just assumed they had nothing in common. Besides, the ginger evidently disapproved of more than one of his activities, while other guys would be impressed as Hell that he had such a good game with older women, for example. Long story, mostly having to do with him refusing to be home, and looking a bit older than he actually was.

Hence, having nothing to say really, Ren nonchalantly nodded to acknowledge the nerd’s existence, before he bent down and into a somewhat relaxed squatting position, after having walked past his dog, that immediately moved out of the way for the pack leader. Casually, the tall male greeted the excited pug, clearly used to dogs, knowing just where to pet and scratch for the happy little creature to try to push closer. That, of course, meant that the other little pugs got equally excited and pulled forward fast to join in. He grinned, raising an eyebrow, gazing up at Hux, to create some sort of silent understanding that Hux’s control of the dogs was… unimpressive. Even so, he didn’t mind giving the tiny black cuddle monsters a bit of attention, hence, he killed the tiny spark in the cigarette by scraping it against the asphalt under their feet. His own dogs ignored the action, but the pugs immediately got curious, trying to get to whatever was in his hands.

“No,” his voice rang out firmly, glaring neutrally, with an air of authority, at the pugs, that backed away, not even wanting to try to challenge his authority in the situation. Then, with both hands free, he got to actually petting the excited dogs, his own pack still patiently awaiting him to be done. There was an evidently different look on his face and in his behaviour upon giving the pugs attention, it was much, much gentler.

“Are they yours? You don’t look like you’re used to walking them,” he pointed out, very matter-of-factly. His mood had improved a lot, since the early afternoon, and it was rather nice to know that he could casually make fun of Hux, like that, since the little shit probably wouldn’t dare talking back at him.

 

[Hux]

He had not expected the other male to step forward, bowing down and held out his hand for the pug. He had no idea which one was which but he assumed that it was Phasma’s favorite, since it seemed brave. He watched with wide eyes as the burnt marshmallow cuddled with Ren, feeling like the world was rocking under his feet. Of course, pugs loved everything and everyone but to see the freak so knowingly snuggle with his pugs… Oh right. Pugs. Plural.

Hux let out a surprised noise as the other two stooges leaped forward at the promise of good cuddles, yanking the lanky male along with them. His ears had most likely surpassed his hair in redness at this point. He had barely time to think that to himself before noticing Ren grinning at him from down with the happy potatoes, mocking him. Yes, they had definitely rushed past the hue of his hair….

Hux noticed the man putting out his cigarette, he didn’t have to know these dogs that well to know that they didn’t have enough brainpower to not try and eat that thing. “...A-ah, wai-”

Ren’s command boomed out before he could finish his own and to his great surprise, they… listened…? The ducktales trio listened to him… Hux felt like someone had thrown cold water over him, leaving him breathless as well as speechless. Not to mention the way the man’s hands moved as he cared for them, scratching, patting and petting… He had never once seen anyone touch anything with such gentleness…

...Was he getting jealous of his DOGS for being patted by REN…?

No. No. Nonononono.

Hux was chewing on his own lip, a very bad habit that he usually managed to keep under control. His fingers itched a little but he closed his hands, making his body follow his orders. Focus. He looked down at Ren again. Like that, he was a kind of sort of… Good height for…

SHAME. Armitage Hux. Stop it!

The man had spoken to him, he decided to throw all his attention there, clinging to the life-saver he had been thrown. “...Ah. No… They are not mine. As in, I don’t own them. They belong to my Father.” He glanced around at the other dogs, surrounding Ren like his personal guard. “If it means so much to you, I am not the one usually walking them. Phasma does that but tonight, she wasn’t feeling all that well.”

That… was a lot of information all at once. He was rambling, wasn’t he? Damnitall. Soon, he was going to tell Ren all about his childhood and how he had wanted to name one of them Napoleon but Phasma had wrestled him for their names and won the right to name them all… Change the subject… Quickly.

“...Are all these yours? I… didn’t know that your family owned any dogs.”

Good save.

 

[Ren]  
What a pitiful sight Hux was, like this. At least, he wasn’t that fucking annoying of a prick when he knew his place, kind of like these little pests of dogs were pretty damn cute when they obeyed and cuddled, since they looked a lot more like a pest when the ginger wasn’t able to control them properly. Ah, well then, the brat didn’t have to take care of the dogs normally, that explained a thing or two.

Ren’s cheek was still bruised, still stung, but then again, a visible bruise or two wasn’t unusual, Ben hadn’t even made that much of a comment about it, but he bet he would hear no end of it without explaining himself, once he was unfortunate enough to run into his mother, he could probably make it past this week without having to, though.

He cuddled the dogs still, but then stood up when Hux started talking, and signalled to his own dogs that they could greet these little cuddle monsters. Tails started waving in excitement, although the approach of these dogs was evidently a bit calmer.

“Nah, they belong to an old fart, that’s a friend of my parents, and he’s a bit too old to take the long walks with them, hence, I do it now and then,” he said, as nonchalantly as ever, with a shrug.

Did they have anything more to say? No-... he didn’t think so. He studied Hux for a moment instead, not glaring, just observing. Since there was no reason to fight or argue right of the moment, and he wasn’t in the mood to cause a scene or really mess with the pathetic kid, because he was in too good of a mood when he had cleared his mind and was alone on walks, like this, he remained silent. Besides, Hux did a great job of embarrassing himself, all on his own, there was no need to make the effort.

The snob was red in the face, evidently embarrassed. He must be a joke of a weakling if he didn’t manage to hold back just three little pugs. He was the sort of nerd that shouldn’t be around Ren’s regular crew, out of school, seeing that they’d brand him a fag in seconds and probably try to force their way into his pants once the alcohol level in their blood was high enough. Hux just looked like the sort of kid that would break in half if Ren ever decided he had enough and to beat him up. The blush was sort of cute, though, too bad the personality he had seen had been fucking horridly snobbish.

 

[Hux]

Did that mean that Ren was actually helping out in one way or another…? That was rather impressive… he had no idea that helping was something that the male would ever even consider to do… “...I see. They seem to like you.” He commented as the dogs all started to greet one another, the three stooges having a lot of fun meeting this mysterious, friendly giants.

He got increasingly uncomfortable the longer Ren looked at him. It didn’t take too long until the ginger tried to escape. He said good bye and more or less dragged the pugs away from their newfound friends. He didn’t look back, just hurrying off towards his home.

~~

Phasma was sick. She was never sick… It was unreal to see her in her bed, completely knocked out under the blankets and three friendly cuddle-monsters. Hux had figured that he could manage just fine without her and for the first day, it had gone pretty well.

The next day became the start of his own personal Hell. He didn’t dare to be around Ren without his sister, so he tried to study on his own, keeping away from everyone. It began as small yells, words such as ‘homo’ being thrown at his back. He couldn’t tell who was speaking or where they went. Then they increased, someone nudged him with their elbow, making him stumble before yelling loudly that the gay had touched him. Mature… very mature.

It continued like that all of Tuesday, increasing all the time. They seemed to get bolder and bolder, seeing as his meatshield wasn’t there. It was a relief to jump into his car, disappearing from school. His fingers itching and his chest feeling heavy. Good thing that Phasma would be in school tomorrow. She had to.

Phasma was never sick. Never… And now it was Wednesday and she was still sick. Hux felt very, very uncomfortable walking from the car to the lockers. He felt as if his worst fear has been realized as he got to his locker… Someone had scribbled all over it with a pretty awful handwriting.

‘I love dicks’

And then decorated it with a surprisingly realistic member. He felt his body turn to ice, unable to move until he heard laughter behind himself. When he looked, no one was laughing or looking his way. He opened his locker and tried to ignore the looks.

Lunch came, he didn’t want to eat alone so he headed for a bench somewhere, where he could be alone. A gang of people stood before the lockers, that wasn’t usually a problem so he acted as if it wasn’t one now either, stepping past them. There was a call from one of the males, making the rest turn his way. Hux recalled that Phasma had beaten them up when she had started the second year, these guys were 3d years. They seemed very cocky, smugly smiling at him.

“...Do you need anything?” He asked, trying to drill a hole in the first male’s head with his gaze. They all seemed very amused by his words. They started to ask him very personal questions, asking how long it took to wash his ass for his lovers, if he shaved his balls, so many questions about his body, comments about his looks. One of them even went so far as to grab his ass, making the ginger flinch towards the lockers.

“What, do you think that he’s still a Virgin?”

“At least he is good at sucking dicks. I bet he sucks his ‘sister’ off all the time, no way she isn’t hiding a cock in her pants, the freak.”

The last comment made him spin towards the last speaker, his ears and face flushed with anger, which only made them laugh harder. They were clearly getting a pretty good kick out of this.

“I agree… She is more of a man than any of you babies could ever be.” Hux spit at them.

That was apparently the drop, one of them grabbed him around the neck, pushing him towards the locker, forcing him inside. His eyes widened, he hated small, closed spaces. He couldn’t hear them speak anymore, he only heard them laugh as it became obvious that he was scared of being locked into his own locker.

 

[Ren]  
Ren hadn’t really given that much of a thought to Hux escaping, that Friday evening, seeing that it felt like something the little nerd would do.

Afterwards, Ren had spent another two hours outside, until it started getting cold, where his supposed grandpa got his dogs back, trying, futile as ever, to convince him to head back home, Hell, Ren didn’t even respond to that bullshit anymore. At the very least, he was kind and considerate enough to say that he’d be home on Monday, for a bit.

Lucky as fuck, for the lone teenager, his favourite cougar was apparently home this weekend, and up for some Netflix and chill. Jesse was working as a flight attendant, was in her early thirties, and pretty damn hot. They had met at a bar, and accidentally ended up at the same house party, where Ren once more had ended up with people way older than himself, while it appeared that this woman had ended up with people younger than her. They had been higher than the Empire State building, but with clear enough minds to communicate their desires, when they had ended up in bed together, in her apartment. Since then, Ren had seen her now and then. She was grown up, pretty decent to talk to, and one of the few people that kind of knew of his life situation, and to be fair, the woman was pretty fucking fucked up, herself, and didn’t give him all that adult-chatter of what he had to change and do. There was something about Jesse, aside from her hobbies of bondage and sex games, metalhead style the second she took off her work uniform and let her long chestnut hair out, or busy job that kept her away mostly all the time that just made a stable relationship impossible. Ren worked well with her, and she appreciated well how the kid was damned good at making food, or how he was surprisingly grown up in ways where they were pretty well leveled, or how he didn’t mind or feel the slightest uncomfortable if she tied him up and fucked him with a huge strap on, until he had to spend half the next day in her bed from being sore. He had a key to the apartment by now, and had been involved with her for half a year, now, and well, fair to say, his parents had no clue. Most of all, they had agreed that he didn’t crash there unless it was an emergency, if she wasn’t home.

The next week approached, and well, it had somewhat, after a very uncomfortable hour arguing with his mother, and convincing her that the bruise, still evident on his cheek, was just a kid that punched and ran, and that he had not been in a bad fight. Hell, he hadn’t even been that high during the weekend. It had been a calm week.

Phasma was apparently sick, which he didn’t actually really give a fuck about; Ren hung out with other people, not caring twice where he sat down, and he could hang with quite some people, if he wanted to. By Tuesday, he realised that he hadn’t seen the prissy younger brother anywhere, except in a class or two, but then, he hadn’t even seen Hux during all the classes. What the Hell had happened to the kid? Had he been locked in a bathroom somewhere? Bullied enough to stay home? Killed and left in a ditch somewhere? Ren wasn’t really bothered, but really, it felt a little strange to be in school without the two of them, he was so used to the loudmouthed sister, and the uninterested brother always being on his phone, next to them. It was a little boring without Phasma. He hadn’t even fought anyone, or gotten into trouble. Weird.

By Wednesday, the boredom was getting to him. Normally he wasn’t contemplating taking drugs or getting drunk in the middle of a full week of school, given what a damn bother it would be to be found out, and even if the principal seemed to like him a lot, not even Principal Snoke could keep him from trouble if they discovered him with drugs in school. He had shoved that girly ass of a football team captain, Dameron, against a locker, and threatened him once, but not even that kept his boredom away. It was one of the longer lunch breaks and Ren had spent some time with some of the kids majoring in music, because they tended to be good company, and into good music.

When he got back to his locker, going to dump a few things and exchange a few books in his bag, and then head out for a smoke before class, he saw something interesting. Hoh, so that was where Hux had been, probably hiding somewhere. Funny, how pathetic the kids in school were; Phasma was away for a few days and suddenly they wanted to play all important and powerful, bullying the younger brother, who wasn’t even responsible for the problems Phasma had caused them. Hell, Ren didn’t even know half the kids in that group, but it looked pretty bad. Yet, he stayed a bit away, leaning against the lockers there, just listening in. Could Hux defend himself? Had a group of people tried to bully Ren like that, most of them would be downed on the floor; the ginger clearly could not defend himself, not one bit. The tall black-haired male did pity the kid a little, this was quite unfair, with so many ganging up against someone defenseless. Ren didn’t do that shit, bullying people in groups, that was. If he was going to hurt or make someone’s life a misery, he took all the responsibility for it himself, and didn’t need any damn backup to secure him.

Actually, Ren was a little impressed to hear that Hux snapped enough to talk back, with a pretty good comment at that, one that quirked a tiny grin on the tall listener’s lips. Although, that was pretty bad, seeing that the guy that the ginger had insulted used the bait as a reason to snap. Well fuck it, this invitation was so fucking clear, a way to ease his boredom a little bit. Besides, it was just plain tragic to see the ginger kid nearly panic, that almost made him feel a little sick. There was a clear panic and distress, more than just how people usually acted scared of him, that sort of terror wasn’t fair.

Bang.

Just a few people had noticed it, and backed away, but definitely not the guy that was trying to shove Hux into his own locker. Hence, no one really had a chance to warn the guy before his nose connected painfully harshly with the locker in front of his face, and being pressed up about it, with a palm at the back of his head. The guy hadn’t even screamed, but rather yelped in surprise, and made a pained second yelp when he felt the impact hurting his head and nose. Hopefully, it would bruise, the shit deserved it, for acting like a weakling who could only bully someone weak, who was alone, when he had half an army with him. At least, when Ren challenged people, it wasn’t the weaklings. When Ren messed with Hux, he took into consideration that the kid couldn’t manage just anything.

There was shock, followed by a terror in the eyes of the guy, that made Ren grin somewhat widely, and amused, where he was leaning against the locker on the other side of Hux’s locker, letting his hand return to rest in his sweater’s pockets, with the other. He was evidently relaxed, and not even mad. Of course, the guy let go of Hux, his face hurt too fucking much, and he started bleeding.

“Fucking pathetic,” Ren snorted out, glancing around at the rest, “trying to get to the brother just because his sister would kick your ass if you tried. You’re in front of my locker as well, so fucking scatter, and don’t bother that prissy brat if it’s in my fucking way, do it elsewhere.” He didn’t care enough about Hux to want to play the hero, it was just really annoying that he couldn’t get to his locker and do what he wanted, and get the chance to smoke before class. Besides, he rather liked the situation.

Fear. Hell, they scattered pretty quickly. By now, they were too scared of what the madman Ren was assumed to be would do to them, even if they tried to argue. There wasn’t even any comments about him saving that homo.

He looked over at the nerd he had saved and rolled his eyes before pulling him out swiftly, noticing just how little the guy weighed, despite being almost as tall as himself. He calmly looked over at the locker door of Hux’s locker and once more rolled his eyes. Alright, so, there were a lot of things that one could bully the ginger rich kid for, but sexuality was just ridiculous. Seeing Ren hadn’t regarded sexuality as a thing, ever, really, being as bisexual as one could get, he never used it as an insult. It was just childish and showed incompetence, and really had a bad effect on society altogether. Stupid fucks. He brought his hand up to his lips and licked it once, still casual, as if he was minding his own business, then pressed it and dragged it over the scribbles on the locker door, rather efficiently smudging them out so that they weren’t readable, and that drawing was completely ruined, even if there was black smudges over the locker, and his hand, but meh, he could wash it later. Said hand returned to its place in the pocket and the other cleaner hand reached out to ruffle Hux’s hair once. Hoh, that felt… good. He hadn’t ever really considered the potential of ruining the prick’s hair until now, but the locks were soft and nice and it was definitely worth it to mess with it. What a new discovery, he bet he could mess with the kid a lot, like that.

“Don’t let them get to you with something so fucking stupid,” he pointed out, casually as ever, before he unlocked his own locker, and started exchanging books and emptying his bag, all he needed was their history book, right of the moment.

 

[Hux]

Hux had claustrophobia, something that he had probably been stuck with since he was younger. He wasn’t sure exactly why he had it, or rather, what had caused it. It felt like he should know but he couldn’t exactly point the reason. Either way, the feeling of the locker’s metal walls closing in on him, holding him stuck and in place, the suffocating grab, he couldn’t breathe…

Bang.

The guy that was pushing him into the locker suddenly disappeared, a big arm showing up and… pushed him away? No, slammed the guy’s poor face into the locker next to his, that… was sure to hurt.

At first, he thought that Phasma had come to school but to his surprise, he didn’t hear his sister’s voice but instead… Ren’s? It felt like his brains had stopped working, where he was half squished into the locker. He couldn’t see the gangster from in here but that voice was unmistakable. Ren continued to speak and the bullies shattered, running away from the High School Force of Nature that the male was.

The gangster came into view, Hux felt like he was watching a scene from behind a window as the male moved to pull him out. His legs were shaking, a lot, making him half fall against Ren before he remembered how they worked. As he stood there, shaking, the taller man was destroying the letters on his locker, making them unreadable… Ah.. They just disappeared like that… He thought they were permanent. It was a relief to see them yield to the man’s rubbing, becoming nothing but a smudged memory.

As Hux watched, the dirty hand disappeared into the pocket of his shirt and the other appeared. He flinched as he realized that the hand was coming towards him, for a second, fear was reflected in his eyes. Not normal fear, true fear. It only lasted for a heartbeat, until he was touched… gently.

Hux blinked, the memory of the Killstar-clad male cuddling with the three pugs became clear in his mind. He recalled how much he had wanted to be touched like that too, not like a dog! Just… with such kindness…

‘Don’t let them get to you.’

Was Ren encouraging him? Helping him? That was… he had never in his wildest dreams believed that the tall bastard would do such a thing… Even if it seemed to be that the guy wanted to get his locker, there had definitely been some part of him that had wanted to help the ginger.

Said ginger placed his books back into his own locker, picking out the history book as well. His hand moved up over his head, trying to return the hair to a presentable style. He… failed. It fell down in his eyes instead. Ugh… Who cared…?

Ren was heading for a smoke, as he always did. Hux never really cared about that but now, he followed him. Almost like a puppy. What, no… not like that… It was just safer to hang around Ren than to navigate school alone.

It wasn’t that cold outside… Or so he thought. He shuddered somewhat, trailing after the taller as he… left the school grounds? Who did that? Most just smoked in bushes or behind the school, thinking that no one saw. The second he was off school ground, Ren started to fiddle with the trigger of the lighter, lighting that smoke and placed it between his beautiful lips. Hux leaned against the fence, turning his back to the gangster as he pulled his phone up, starting to move his fingers over it. The screen wasn’t visible for Ren, meaning that he could do anything from writing a text to reading on some page.

“...Thank you.”

Not looking at him. Not looking up at all. Focus on the phone.

 

[Ren]  
The ginger brat had been shaking like a damned leaf, barely able to stand, upon being pulled out of that small, evidently uncomfortable space. Ren didn’t really react, aside from aiding the kid in finding his balance again. Normally, he’d think of Hux as pretty fucking pathetic for reacting so strongly, but this wasn’t a regular beating or just someone threatening, the aspect of being locked up in a small space with little to no air ventilation was something a person would react to by instinct. Sure, Ren wouldn’t freak out, but he couldn’t even fit that space, to begin with. People always imagined the worst, and Hell, there would still be that fear of possibly being locked up for hours, and if no one really cared to open that up, he could have been stuck the night, which was highly unlikely, but then again people imagined the worst. Anyway, to fear that was pretty natural, a survival instinct, more or less. Ren would never lock someone up in their locker, like that, it was too cruel, and too much of a bother with the lasting damage it would cause. He wasn’t out to to traumatize people permanently, just get rid of his boredom and messed up thoughts, just distraction, just to have others properly respect him. He didn’t bully people, he just made the people that entered his path or dared challenging him regret their choice.

The hint of true, deep rooted, fear, upon him ruffling the hair of the other was kind of… expected? Not only was the brat shaken from the situation and previous danger, probably pumped with adrenaline, but could the taller of the two really fucking expect anything but that, if he had always been nothing but threatening to the other. Of course Ren understood what a nerd like Hux would feel, when someone that dangerous approached him. The look on the kid’s face was worth every second of that, once Hux realised that there was no ill intent, even more so than ruining the silly hairstyle. Of course that was unexpected, it was half the fun, and Ren found that he was truly amused by it.

Something a bit more unexpected was for Hux to trail after him. He was that desperate to have someone to hide behind, then? Well, to be fair, Ren had no fucking clue just how bad it had been for the other, the past days, and he was aware of the fact. Besides, he didn’t really mind, it had been strangely dull without the rich brat-siblings, even with other friends and people he spent time with in school, and he assumed that Hux wouldn’t dare to be such a fucking bitch if he was alone, and didn’t have someone to protect him from Ren. It felt pretty fucking natural to have the redhead in the corner of his vision as he went about his business of finally getting his smoke, and he still missed the dense fucking sister who’d grab at any bait for a verbal fight. Although, since this was a calm day, he supposed he preferred having just the nerd and not the loudmouth. Besides, had he ever really been alone with him, nah, he didn’t think so.

“They were in the way of my locker, and damned loud.”

“... and you looked fucking tragic.”

He spoke as if he didn’t care about his own death, as nonchalantly as ever, without putting an effort behind things. The taller didn’t really try to be neutral, but he often knew just how invested he felt like being, and it wasn’t much, not very often.

After a few draws of the cigarette, Ren leaned over and sneaked a peek of Hux’s phone screen. He wouldn’t pry, especially if the kid had a social life, which he kind of didn’t expect, really. The black haired male just found that he was bored and that in his lack of motivation, he could check what it really was that Hux always did on his phone, being so uninterested in his surroundings.

Was that… Sudoku? He couldn’t help letting out a half-silent snicker, for just a second, before leaning back against the fence. In the process of sneaking a peek, he had taken a step closer, meaning they were just a meter away from each other. So, either Hux had some weird math-related hobbies or he was simply trying to flee and get distractions? Pretty sad.

He drew another breath of smoke and stared ahead of him, thinking a little bit. He had saved this little shit just a few moments ago, not for any heroic purpose, but rather because he could. At least Ren didn’t think he did it out of kindness, he wasn’t kind, not to his own knowledge. The rich kid seemed to have taken it as an invitation that the smoker wouldn’t kill him, if he followed him around, well, supposedly Hux would have a point in that. A part of him felt like it should bother him, but it really… didn’t? It didn’t matter for shit if the ginger was in his presence, it had never really bothered him, even if the kid himself did annoy Ren, but that was only when his prissy personality showed, which wasn’t always. Hux had proven to be somewhat clever, and interesting enough, whenever school forced them to debate or whenever they actually took part of the same discussion, which happened, even if it was rather rare; at the very least, Ren was only annoyed with him now and then, meaning that generally, he simply didn’t give two shits about Hux.

Another realisation hit the black-clad male as he stared ahead. Right, he had actually forgotten all the talk about Hux being gay, that had followed them around for a long time. He knew Phasma to have beaten kids up for it, and to silence them well. Ren didn’t quite recall how that thing started, or why, because he hadn’t cared, the kids were just fucking stupid for giving a shit about such a thing as people’s preferences. Once they reached their college or university studies, they’d reach a world of people that didn’t quite care anymore; there were reasons that most of Ren’s real friends were past twenty in age. They weren’t as fucking childish and stupid, and because of his looks and ways, he wasn’t treated as a kid, most of the time.

He had nothing better to do, right of that moment, in the silence with the nerd, than to open his mouth and speak, casual as ever. “So, are you gay or is that just shit they’re using to get to you, because you look pretty gay?” He had turned to look at the, now only slightly, shorter male, with curiosity in his eyes. He didn’t look one bit mocking. Meh, he’d probably forget the answer in a few weeks, but it didn’t quite matter, it was better than nothing, right now.

 

[Hux]

Hux felt anger pulse through him as the other male had the nerve to call him tragic looking, his fist curled up a little around the phone, his eyes glancing at the other one, shooting him a short deathglare. Yet Ren was right, there was no way that he would do something or return a sharp comment when he didn’t have Phasma there to make sure he kept all his teeth. Not to mention that the current strategy of survival was based on staying close to the gangster who had sort of maybe but not really for his own sake, no, not for Hux’s sake but for his own… Saved him.

Hux returned to the game, he didn’t even like sudoku all that much but it was a game that was supposed to stimulate the brain, keep it smart and alert. The only thing it had done so far was to make him want to crush his phone. Okay, it always felt pretty damned good whenever he did beat a puzzle. So he kept on, working through puzzle after puzzle… slowly, steadily… Numbers, so many numbers. He could understand numbers a lot better than people, even if sudoku made him annoyed, it was so much better than having to interact with other humans.

There was a snicker by him, making the ginger jump. He turned to the side, seeing Ren being a lot closer, peeking down on his phone. He made a face at him, turning the device so that it wasn’t as visible to the smoker what he was doing.

Silence fell over the two of them, the smoke raising towards the sky as the numbers were being typed and erased as the puzzle was slowly being solved. The quiet was rather pleasant, as Hux already knew, he didn’t really have anything to talk to Ren about. Or so he thought. The question and the comment made him almost drop his phone, turning towards the man with a mix of fear, shock and anger.

“I don’t look gay. There is no such thing… I look proper for heaven’s sake, not homosexual…!” He growled out and looked back at the phone. He had lost the game and the information was being delayed to him in a bright red text, reading out WRONG. Under the big text, there was a smaller one. Try again? Yes. No.

He pressed the no button and stuffed the phone in his pocket, crossing his arms in defense over his chest. He wasn’t as much angry as he was scared, someone like Ren could most likely smell the fear from him.

“...F...fine… I… I…” His hand was moving towards his gloved arm, lightly touching the underside of it, scratching slightly. It was a small gesture, one that shouldn’t cause any notice from Ren. He had never actually said the words out loud, never truly formed the words with his very own lips. “I… Like men. M...men… not women…” He looked as if the words were going to break him, as if it physically hurt him to speak. There was so much regret and pain behind the words. The fingers moved over his arm, over the glove, unable to reach any skin. “The...ere now you know… Go ahead, have as fun as you possibly can with that… Stay as far away as you can or the gay-germs will get you…” He was definitely on the verge of a breakdown.

 

Ren:  
Hoh, he never imagined that the brat would come out and confess like that easily. Alright, easy probably wasn’t the right word because it looked like the ginger would have a break down any second, or well, technically, Ren supposed he was already having a panic attack. Eh, what a drag. It was pitiful and tragic to watch.

So… Hux was one of those kids that had somehow missed the whole notion that being gay wasn’t a bad thing. Of course, a prissy little rich kid probably had some expectations and ideas that he was better than that, which would piss Ren of a little. However, there was too much fear in the ginger’s eyes to consider it was about thinking he was better than it, rather, it seemed like said kid had gone through some shit on that topic.

‘Go ahead, have as fun as you possibly can with that… Stay as far away as you can or the gay-germs will get you…’

Eh, the tall man dropped his cigarette and killed it by scraping his boot over it. How should he put this to calm the kid… uh.. Well then. Evidently, it seemed like the not-so-little-anymore nerd had missed the biggest scoop in their school for the past two weeks, otherwise, he would assume that Hux wouldn’t be telling a bisexual man to stay away to avoid gay-germs and stupid shit like that.

Whore.

Eh, having sex with several different people didn’t make you a whore, and hence, Ren didn’t particularly care about the people whispering and gossiping it, he had worse things to worry about than what the kids in school thought about him. If they insulted him to his face, however, he would put them in their place, just to maintain his position and not having to bother with them further.

Of course, a loner like Hux had not seen the video that had spread around school, lately.  
Ren had been… careless. He had no illusions that he had no one but himself to blame, there. He had gotten a little too wasted and high to tell the floor from the ceiling, and his head was spinning, honestly, he couldn’t remember shit of what happened, and from the obvious evidence that had been recorded, he hadn’t even been able to stand up properly. Then well, by the time a guy had decided to push him back up over a table and fuck him, right there in that all too crowded, sweaty room of the house party. The crowd was quite a bit older, and none of the teens of his school were there, so yeah, that was shit, and something the tall young male had to stand for. At least he hadn’t gotten any diseases from it, Hell, he had been quick as fuck to look that up, upon figuring what he did. It… was shit, to be fair, but he couldn’t afford to care and be emotional, it wouldn’t do any good, it was just to accept fact.

He sighed, and tilted his head a little bit, and then once more, reached out with the clean hand, reminding himself that he would have to scrub those marks away from his left hand, later. The fingers connected with the hair, and he stroke it rather softly, ruffling it slightly. Ren supposed that the most straightforward way to handle Hux whole too-disgusting-to-touch-the-gay issue by touching him.

 

[Hux]

Being gay is okay! There is nothing wrong with you, you just like what you like, it’s natural.

The words from the computer screen filled the room that was otherwise dark, bathing the pale teenager in a strange, unnatural light. It was very late, he should be down in bed but he prayed to all the gods there were that no one would figure out he wasn’t asleep yet. The homepage was full of rainbow flags, of people of all genders and colors kissing, holding hands, being so very happy and beautiful. This must be the fifth article he read that told him just how normal and nice it was. That explained that they had been insecure when they were younger but it was the most important to open one’s heart and be honest to themselves.

PRIDE.

So much about being happy and proud for who they were and that they were beautiful and something about colors and rainbows and Hitler deciding that pink was a color for girls… Okay. What? That didn’t really help him all that much… Another article, another homosexual man telling him that it was okay to feel the way he felt.

Hux shut off his computer, an icy and hopeless feeling clinging to him as he walked over the room to his bed, climbing up among the covers and cuddled himself down among the fluffy covers. He was lucky, wasn’t he… Living in such a beautiful, warm and pleasant mansion… He sank lower, disappearing even further. If it was so very natural to be a homo, why did all the boys shy away from him? Why did they treat him like a disease, how come he couldn’t come closer than 5 meters without getting strange treatment. Other boys, especially when playing sports, were all close to one another, hugging and sometimes even kissing (at least on TV)... It was obviously things a dirty gay couldn’t do. Then he was creepy. If he looked at a man any longer than one second, he was a creep. There were so many parts of the country that wouldn’t mind if he was chased out of the country, where he could easily be beaten down and it would be completely just.

Not to mention his Father’s reaction…

They all said it would be better, they all said it was okay but all the children, all the teenagers looked at him like a freak. Yeah, sure it will get better. If he was even alive after high school…

Something… Happened. At first, his mind was too far away to realize what was happening, it took him quite a few seconds to realize what Ren was doing. There was a hand in his hair, a big, warm, male hand… touching him. Gently. That was… such an alien feeling. For someone who had never really been touched by men, who had been shunned for so long, hell… Even normal touches were rather alien to him. For this gangster to just… That the reaction from someone else, a man, upon hearing that he was too dirty, too gay to be touched… To touch him.

It felt like something very big was stuck in his throat. With blue, lost eyes he looked up at Ren, feeling his chest ache like it was about to break. Ren was so close, it was so easy… Before he knew it, he had fallen just a little, his forehead bumping against the other’s chest. He hadn’t fallen completely, just let himself seek the warmth from the only person in school that wanted to touch him.

He would be angry or upset later about the fact that it just happened to be that awful, stupid, tall, well dressed, perfect-assed shithead named Ben Solo.

 

[Ren]  
Well, fuck it, it seemed like Ren was going to ditch class. What an interesting situation, he didn’t quite mind ditching history class, since he had quite a bit of knowledge on the subject, already. However, to do it because Hux, of all people, was hiding against his chest like a sad and desperate thing that needed to be cared for, was…. Odd, and interesting. The sort of strange situation that definitely threw some color into his monotone week, something fucked up enough to be curious, and that you never imagined would happen.

He didn’t move away when the ginger fell into his arms, like that, or well not exactly falling, but hell, it was close enough. Desperate much? Eh, maybe that was pretty natural. Cute. Yes, the prissy rich kid was rather cute like this, when he didn’t bitch around and was honest with things, and bared some of his insecurities. The very least Ren could do was to take responsibility for having saved the other, and for asking all those things, it was more interesting that way, anyway.

Due to wearing his platforms, he was at least tall enough for Hux to just fall forward and end up against his chest, and all of a sudden, there was soft ginger hair right under his chin. It was a kind of funny color, because it was such a light tone that it always looked like the sun was falling on it, even on such a grey day as this one. Well, this situation wasn’t that much of his responsibility… but he let his hand follow the head of the shorter, finding its way back to stroke the hair softly, now at the back, meaning that the arm was around the shoulders and back of the other, holding him somewhat close, without Ren being all too cuddly.

Yeah, classes definitely had already started.

For quite some time, he just stayed silent, he didn’t quite know if there was something to say about this fucked up situation.

“It’s chill, there’s literally nothing strange with being gay,” he muttered, casually, when Hux started to calm. What the hell was he supposed to say, anyway? That was perhaps not the smoothest of comments but there wasn’t much else to say.

 

[Hux]

 

It might be tragic, yes, that was most likely the word one would use to describe this, tragic, that Armitage Hux was not used to these sorts of soft comforting. To he held when he was upset or have his hair stroked, being calmed by the caress of a gentle hand, to have his worried and fears eased by other assistance… Yes. It wasn’t something he had experienced before.

When reading about homosexuality, about how it wasn’t really something to be ashamed of, the words had felt so cold… So matter of fact. Like the emotionless, black letters on a computer screen that they were. One could read almost anything on the internet, there was no feeling in text, no… comfort. Not the same way as when Ren’s voice, his muscular body and his big, warm hand all simultaneously assured him that no, there was nothing wrong about his feelings and wants. By God, wasn’t that an amazing relief?

Ren was so warm… Everything about him that made him seem so scary and dangerous seemed so… false this close. He didn’t have any sharp edges, he wasn’t hard or felt like a rock upon contact… He was simply a person, not some sort of monster.

Hux didn’t think he was crying, he definitely didn’t think he was... One of his hands had found the edge of Ren’s hooding, wrapping around the fabric. It was very similar to the way he would sometimes cling to Phasma’s shirt when he was nervous, a sort of… plead for attention but not daring to take more than that little piece of clothing into his hands.

He had no idea how long they stood like this; him gasping and shaking, trembling and hyperventilating, and Ren; calm, comforting, warm. How much time passed? A hour, a minute, two seconds? He had no idea, he lost most sense of time whenever he became like… this.

Finally, he was able to pull back from the man, his legs shaking from exhaustion. The male moved away from Ren, letting himself sink down against the fence, where he ended up sitting on the ground. At least he wasn’t hyperventilating anymore, only breathing rather harsh. Looking at Ren proved far too hard so he focused on the ground in front of him instead, trying to calm down completely. It was… hard. Someone else being there made it all the harder…

 

[Ren]  
Definitely missing the last period today, then. Ren supposed that he could ask some classmates if he missed anything vital and important, it’s not like they would dare refuse to answer him, and most of their classmates weren’t that hostile towards him, even in scared ways. Supposedly, only his classmates saw him whenever he shaped up a little and did what he had for school presentations, meaning that they saw his intellect, and his ways when he didn’t quite try to be intimidating. Actually, the black haired male would probably manage rather well anyway, even if he missed a lecture, later during the seminar. Funny, he didn’t quite realise it, but he was probably thinking that the ginger in his arms would probably be in much more trouble than himself if he missed out on the lecture content. It wasn’t that dramatic of a thought, it was just as simple as that Hux should know what he missed, especially since it wasn’t really his own fault that he missed the period.

The slightly shorter male let go and sank down on the ground, obviously a lot calmer, but sure as Hell not fine. Eh, the weather was nice enough, despite the grey and cloud filled sky, and it wasn’t like they were in a hurry anymore. Supposedly, the weakling beside him might wanna get out of here before the period was over and this way would be flooded with the other kids.

Eh, they had at least one and a half hour.

The taller sank down against the fence, next to Hux, relaxing his position a little. For a while again, he just relaxed and remained silent, awaiting the other to calm down a little. After a while, when half the period had passed, he decided to speak up again, though.

“Wanna get out of here? Period ends in less than an hour.”

What the Hell did he just offer? Supposedly, he wouldn’t mind to be just anywhere that wasn’t school. It wasn’t the entire world if Hux joined him for just anything.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> \---- Headcanons and Facts ----
> 
> Ren at comforting:  
> He is so straight forward and tends to just force through his own problems, all puns intended, that he really doesn't have the full answer to how to help someone who is as deeply scarred as Hux. Ren: *thinks of something that could comfort and hopes he won't fuck up* AAAAAAaaaAA.


	3. Dear Diary: Ren made me skip school

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "He was NOT ready for the other male to suddenly strip. He automatically took a step back, grabbing onto the rem of his sidebag, really unsure where he was supposed to look."
> 
> Continuing from the scenario where Ren saves Hux's ass and asks if he wants to hang out.

[Hux]

Calming down was… hard. Very hard. He had never really had a breakdown like this in school, they usually only happened when he was alone. One time, Hux had to stay in the bathroom for a bit longer, very much longer than he had planned, to gather himself before going to the class. Luckily, that had been during lunch, not… like this. He hadn’t missed an entire lesson before. 

When Ren spoke up, his mind didn’t register the first words, instead made him pull his phone up and look at the screen. The truth hit him straight in the face, for the first time ever… Armitage Hux hadn’t been at class… Of course, he had been sick sometimes but this… This had been ditching class for something as pathetic as a breakdown. He should be better than this… 

Hux’s face showed a clear hint of panic as he attempted to stand up but his legs wouldn’t work at all, making him trash in a way that made him feel quite… stupid. Just… Stupid. He fell back against the fence once more, his ears having turned red from embarrassment. 

“Gn.. Did you know how much time had passed?” He more or less barked at the male next to him, needing to direct his anger… somewhere. Someplace… He had to… somehow… Not break down again. Not panic. Yelling at Ren seemed to be a pretty good way of venting his anger and stress. “Why didn’t you tell me? I… I have to go… How much… Just one hour left… I… I have to…” 

But his legs couldn’t move… Couldn’t move…

 

 

[Ren]

Fucking brat.    
  
Ren glared, and of course, he probably didn’t mean to look as threatening as he did, because all in all, he was just tired of the spoiled little prissy brat’s behaviour. Hux was being silly, and there was this annoying imbalance between him wanting to encourage the kid that it was fine to miss just one class, and to be pretty fucking irritated with how much Hux was overreacting to missing a single class.    
  
It was always like that, his emotions always torn in between wanting to do something sensible and good, and be understanding, and being annoyed and maybe slightly short-sighted. It was positively fucking exhausting and only served to stress him up, and annoy him further.   
  
Quickly and swiftly he grabbed the ginger by the chin and turned his head to look back at the annoyed face, surrounded by wild black waves of hair.    
  
“Fucking calm down,” Ren responded; his voice wasn’t exactly threatening, not quite, but he was sure as Hell not happy. “Don’t give me that shit after you break down like that, it’s one fucking lecture, you’ll be fine. I’ll text Sam to check what we’re missing out on, so just fucking chill.” The more he talked… the gentler his voice became, as if the generally angry man subconsciously remembered that he was, after all, making an effort for the other to calm down and realise that it was okay.    
“If you want to, we could go somewhere to read up on what the Hell we just missed, will that calm your ass down?”    
  
Why did he even have a sense of responsibility? Sure, he liked teaching, he knew that he liked helping and being of use, as long as he was appreciated and got the actual credit for it, all too many times people neglected his efforts, and it had resulted in him just not caring anymore. Fuck, Ren hated how he spontaneously did these things, still feeling enough sense of responsibility to not back down.

[Hux]

He had… definitely passed a line...He could see the anger, the rage in the other man's face. He realized that Phasma wasn’t there, his first reaction was to look for her, to want to hide behind her as always. No shield… No one to help him from Ren’s anger… 

Hux flinched as he saw the man move but he was, of course, far too slow to do anything about it. His face was grabbed by that strong, warm and big hand, his face being kept in place by it. Ren looked so wild all of a sudden, the fire in his eyes burning. It somehow made him all the more… attractive. Hux felt his heart flutter in his chest, some sort of pull towards that… wildness, freedom… His face started to heat, as their eyes were locked at one another. 

Ren’s voice turned softer and softer, the more he talked, making Hux’s fears ease. It seemed like he hadn’t made him ‘I am going to slaughter you’ angry. More at the ‘You are going to get punched’, level. Thinking about it… Ren had never once even attempted to punch him, even if he had been threatening. 

Hux slowly nodded and pulled himself back, strangely enough, that really had calmed him down… Truly. Hah… He didn’t feel as stressed out anymore, he could feel his legs again. Was he really going to... ? Yes, it seemed like he was.. 

“...Ah… Okay. I… We can go and… study… together. I suppose.” He moved away, rubbing his cheek a little. Strong… “What place did you have in mind?” If he pretended that he had been outside, at those places where teenagers usually, uh, ‘hung’, maybe it wouldn’t be as obvious how lost he was.  

 

 

[Ren]   
When Hux calmed down, Ren let go of the freckled face, and rolled his eyes in the process; fuck, this was ridiculous, but he supposed that it was a little bit interesting, as well. It was a general way of the young man to be more of a ‘yes’ person than a ‘no’ person; Hux was definitely a ‘no’ person, in general. The difference was that a person that mostly says yes only says no when they have reason to, meaning that they experience a lot more, and try out a lot more thing, while a no person always says no unless they have a good reason not to, meaning they miss out on most things. 

  
He picked up his phone and sent off said text, just so that would be sorted, and then he stood up, holding a hand out to the shaken teenager next to him, casual as ever.    
  
Ren never really explained where they were going, but at least he had told the ginger that there was a damn chill café downtown, where he planned on taking them. Just a café, not what and where.    
  
His phone buzzed on the way down and got to know that the history they were currently reading was the prehistoric one, explanations of how civilizations first arose, and the connections between societies, slavery and money. Alright, that could definitely be a damn lot harder; he could explain that in his sleep, at this point.    
  
Later, he brought Hux into a small street-corner café, in a calmer part of the town, pretty much a back-alley place. The interior and decoration was rather retro in style, and most of all, mismatched to some degree, as if they had been bought second-hand. The light was half-dimmed, but not that dark, and there weren’t all that many people there, just yet. There was a small café counter with different sweets obviously pretty damn homemade, and some alternatives for food, like pre-arranged salads and pizza slices. There were also signs here and there advertising all their vegan products, all the fair-trade products, how this café was a project by the local university and driven more or less only by its students. There was a small, kind of makeshift stage in the corner, with a few instruments and a speaker system. There were a few guitars on the walls, as well. There were band posters and LP discs on the walls, as well, a little here and there, with no particular order or organization.    
  
Ren found a corner table with a couch that he threw his bag onto, and then unzipped his hoodie, throwing it next to the bag, leaving him with nothing but a band-print tank top, with System of a Down on his upper body. It was, after all, a lot warmer in here than outside, and warmer than school.    
  
Next, he found his way to the counter, and paid for a cup of coffee and one of their chocolate muffins advertised to be twice as large as at a normal café, same with their choco chip cookies. The way he greeted the barista made it obvious that he knew her, and maybe their ways were a tad flirtatious, just a bit; at least, Ren was grinning a lot and they seemed to be joking a lot, leaning in a little closer when speaking.    
  
At last, he returned to the table with his snack, and sat down on the couch, bringing the history book up. Finally then, he was actually looking at Hux properly, giving the male some attention, “are you going to get something?”

 

 

[Hux]

Hux did not take Ren’s hand, he stood up on his own. His body was still shaking. It was somewhat hard to move but he wasn’t completely unused to bodily pain. Getting a growth spurt during summer had been a lot worse than this. Or so he told himself. He followed Ren without a word, when they stopped by a red-light, he pulled his phone up and texted his driver that he would be late today, he would contact him when he knew how much longer he would stay. 

Walking behind Ren started to feel a tad strange, especially when he realized that he must look like a puppy or something along those lines. He sped up to walk next to the bigger teenager, taking the time to look around as they walked. He was never in these parts of the city, at least not these days. He had been a few times when he was younger but not… Now. Stores, people, so many of all… Such strange clothes in the windows, people walking their dogs, oh God, what was the matter with that hat? A yellow coat, with those boots? Was there really a need to have that many piercings…? Oh, he was very classy… That hairstyle matched his clothes perfectly… Oh, a pug… 

They arrived at the café, it was like stepping into a new world… Everything was such a mess… The tapestry was… almost sloppinly put up, the tables weren’t matching, the chairs weren’t the same, standing in a mess. There was no real order to it, everything just seemed dumped randomly. The carpet under his feet was thick, it almost felt like his feet would sink into it. So many scents… The displays showing lots of different food, snacks and pastries. Hux started to read the signs, the menus on the walls…

Ren picked a table, making the other male trail after him. He was NOT ready for the other male to suddenly strip. He automatically took a step back, grabbing onto the rem of his sidebag, really unsure where he was supposed to look. Ren simply brushed past him, seemingly not caring at all that his heart was racing. Hux glanced after him and then placed himself down into the...uhm… sofa? It seemed more like a long armchair… Oh! He sank down a lot in it, it was very soft…

His eyes found their way to Ren, as he talked with the girl by the counter. Oh… He blinked, watching as the angry, rough teenager just… Smiled… He seemed like a completely different man, looking so very happy and free, flirting with no shame. There was a light in his eyes, that angry fire just seemed to be a soft glow… He seemed so free, in ways that Hux had never seen before. A man he hadn’t seen before. 

A burning jealousy started to throb in his chest, one he himself couldn’t place at all, yet it was so… overwhelming… Jealousy towards the barista, for being able to bring out such a different side of Ren. He couldn’t hear what they were talking about, even so, he found himself edging forward forward on the couch, listening. 

Ren came back, causing him to look up at the man. His eyes got stuck on his shirt, reading the title of the band. He wasn’t really sure what it meant but he decided that he should google it when he got back home. Oh… yeah, something to eat or drink…? He pulled his bag off and stood up, walking over to the barista. So many things… He had no idea where to start… 

“...Do you have dairy free products with less sugar? And… green or herb tea with honey?” He asked the woman behind the counter, trying not to look at her like she was a worm. He failed, accidentally looking down upon her as if she was miles below him, his questions sounding like orders. 

They had what he asked for and about a minute later, he returned to Ren, sitting down next to him. He wondered if they were washed the cups well… He hoped so. 

Like his classmate, he pulled up the history book and his laptop, opening it. It took a little for it to start, during which time he looked at his pastry. What was it…? Oh well, he… supposed that he would have to eat it.

 

 

[Ren]   
Ren had told Anne that the, according to her, cute redhead he had brought with him was, in fact, a classmate, which was one of the things they had talked about, during their discussion over the counter. The barista didn’t just flirt with Ren, but had pointed out to the tall man how cute the kid was, and wondered if they had a thing. That was something said tall man completely denied, because of course, there was no such ‘thing,’ not really. Hell, he just headed to a good place to study with a classmate, that was normal, right?    
  
Funny enough, Hux didn’t look completely out of place here. Ren, of course, didn’t look out of place at all, Hell, he tended to hang out here a lot. It helped to look way past your own age. Hux… kind of just dressed the part, he didn’t look like a child, but rather, a scrawny person. Adults could be kind of small and thin, too, after all. The style of clothes that the ginger wore made him look like your average hipster University student, and had he not acted so out of place, perhaps he would have looked like he belonged here. Sometimes younger kids showed up, too, but they tended to be a little intimidated by the older crowds, especially during event nights when amateur bands played, or the open stage nights.    


Later when Hux went to order something, Ren just watched from where he sat, casually observing just how….. Well fuck, the kid definitely lacked all that was social ability. Anne certainly didn’t look as impressed with him anymore, and it made the taller man that was waiting for him quirk a smirk on his lips; wasn’t the brat just ridiculous? There was such a stark contrast between the two, kind of hipster, kind of nerdy, redheads, yet they were kind of alike. Besides, despite not looking the type, Anne was someone that Ren had fucked, once in the past, after one of the open stage nights. She was pleasant, witty and wilder than she looked; she was much more to his liking than people would imagine. Hux was… seemingly not much of that.   


Once the kid sat back down again, Ren got to work, explaining the new theme they had in History class and the basics around it, showing what pages were to be read and not. Of course, there were a good 50 pages on it, and the black-haired didn’t feel like he needed to bother to read them. Instead, after he had sat down with his classmate for what was probably over an hour of discussing the topic, he decided to do something else. Hux should get a chance to read, after all. It was interesting to find that his classmate was particularly bright, and kind of good at following, if the subject was explained the right way, and if all the information was presented to him, he did not seem as good at making connections and figuring what would logically be a fact based on just having a general clue of how a society would work. That, of course, was one of the reasons why Ren had no damn need to read all those chapters properly, and left Hux to do some reading.   
  
He got up and walked over to the counter, asking Anne if he could borrow one of the guitars, to which she just confirmed that he could borrow pretty much any choice of them; it wasn’t the first time he used their instruments. Hence, he picked an acoustic guitar that he liked down from the wall and went back to sit next to his classmate.    
“Hey, will it bother you if I play?” 

 

 

[Hux]   
  


Studying wasn’t exactly hard for him, he was pretty good at blocking out most distractions around him, pretty good at keeping focus on what he was doing. Hux had expected himself to be allowed to disappear off in his book, reading in silence but instead, he ended up having a rather good and educating discussion with Ren about the subject before he even stated to read. He even made a few notes as the other one made some rather good comments about a few things. Below them, he stated Ren as the source, if only to remind himself to extra check the credibility behind said statements. 

After an hour, where he tea had been finished, as well as the snack, Hux wasn’t quite as tense about being in here with Ren and he also forgot his jealousy of the girl by the counter. It… felt surprisingly easy to speak to the man now. The ginger had even gone so far as to cross his legs over one another, sitting in a much more relaxed position, no longer looking like he had a stick up his arse (as so many thought about him). 

Ren seemed to want to do something else, leaving him alone with the book, the pages to read. He turned towards the book, picking it up and started to read. He quickly disappeared into the studying, completely focusing on what the text told him. He only stopped to take notes and write down the page-number where he found it. 

Hux was so very busy with his work that he didn’t even notice that Ren was speaking with him, not at all registering that the other was trying to get into contact with him.

 

 

[Ren]   
Well, since the ginger seemed to actually have zoned out completely, and didn’t react at all, Ren supposed that it wasn’t going to bother him to play. Hence, the teenager sat down and started playing the melody for The Mortician’s Daughter, just going with something that was simple enough to play, once he had checked that the guitar was properly tuned.    
  
Now and then, but very rarely, he glanced over at Hux. He kind of had to look a little bit at what he was doing with his fingers, to get it completely right. Even so, he was pretty damn decent for someone self-taught. Around fifth grade, he had found that he enjoyed spending pretty much all the free time he was allowed in the school’s music room, meaning that he could practice, look up tutorials and similar. He had gotten a guitar as a birthday gift when he was thirteen. Ever since, Ren did play a lot of music, he had learnt that he really enjoyed it. 

Music really was a good distraction, that helped him not to think. The slow and boring week had led to him thinking way too much about things he didn’t want to think about. The arguments with his mom, that bitch Rey in the class and the fact that his cheek was still slightly colored from the bruise she had caused, and many things more just kept on piling up in his head, making him restless, making him want a high, or simply to play music, music worked.    
  
Time passed again, and visitors appeared and disappeared, one or two acknowledging Ren’s presence without really striking up a conversation, obviously knowing him, at the very least greeting him. He had re-filled the cup of coffee once, drinking it, and playing a bit of mixed songs that just happened to come to mind. There were surprisingly few people here, considering there would likely be some sort of open stage event, later this evening. Eh, he didn’t quite care. Just like Hux disappeared into his reading, Ren disappeared into his music.    
  
The sound of the guitar was silenced with a sudden, slightly louder mismatched movement where it lightly knocked into the table. What caused Ren to do that? Well, someone had grabbed him by the shoulders, and leaned in over him, and it had startled the fuck out of him, even if it didn’t get to him more than barely reacting, just being the slightest bit visibly startled. There was female laughter, with a somewhat hoarse and raspy voice, and a pair of arms snuck around his neck, in a hug that would have strangled him slightly if it wasn’t so weak. The hands had fingerless leather gloves on, and a long sleeved soft shirt that was slightly trashed, with a military camouflage pattern.    
  
“Hey, fuckwit, are you here to study or will you stay the evening?” The voice was clearly excited, and what Hux, if he looked up, could see clinging to Ren was a heavily makeup-covered and pierced face, and a bun of black dreads. The young woman looked at least older than the kids in their high school, and had a somewhat androgynous look to her, and looked just a bit hispanic, even if it was a little difficult to see under all the makeup and her general style.    
  
Their table had been somewhat surrounded by four people. There was that girl that clung to Ren, which the tall man didn’t quite seem to mind, on the contrary he leaned back against her with an amused look on his face. Next to her, a blonde girl pulled over a chair and straddled it backwards, leaning over the backrest and relaxed. Her hair was clearly over-bleached and she wasn’t wearing that much makeup, at least, her face was thin, and so was her features, almost a little insect-like, in a very human way, the one clinging to Ren had a lot more meat on her bones. The blonde also looked tired, with bags under her eyes, but was still smiling, amused, glancing over at Hux with curious eyes. She was wearing a black and oversized cardigan, and a band t-shirt on, one with text so ruined from washing that it was barely readable, but it was a Judas Priest shirt.    
  
Lastly, there were two guys as well, and one of them looked… surprisingly normal. Short blonde hair, a plain t-shirt and hoodie with a print on the back that couldn’t be seen from where the youngest two were sitting. He had a piercing in his left eyebrow, which was pretty much it, aside from bracelet tattoos on his wrists in tribal patterns, that were only slightly visible under the hoodie. He was tall, probably about the same height as Hux. Lastly, there was a man with hair that was probably dyed black, in a ponytail, and his hair was probably longer than the blonde girl’s that only touched at her shoulders. All in all, they looked just like the sort of company Ren would have, really, he fit right in.    
  
Ren was once more grinning, all amused. “Depends, are you offering dinner, as well?” he retorted to the girl, who immediately snorted out a sound in amusement and responded; “as long as you play with us, tonight.” To that, Ren only nodded.   
  
“Who’s the twink?”

  
The seemingly ‘normal’ guy asked the question, looking at the ginger in a somewhat nonchalant way, but his eyes reflected interest.    
  
Right, fuck, Ren had forgotten that Hux was there with him, for a moment. Eh, alright, this was perhaps not the best crowd for the timid rich kid. Then again, there were worse people that he hung out with. He still hadn’t moved out of the grip of the woman with dreads, but shrugged and grinned. “Hands off, he’s not legal; you could get arrested... he’s a classmate,” Ren paused before the last words, hesitating a bit. Classmate was good, and it was true, and it probably helped them realise that the poor kid wasn’t one of them, and perhaps should be somewhat left alone.    
  
“He’s cute,” the blonde woman commented, lazily, having gone to a position where she rested her head on her arms. Actually, Ren would bet that she was a little bit high, even if not that bad…. Probably.    
  
“Aye, but you’re not his type, so hands off.”    
  
“Why, gonna keep him all for yourself?” she retorted.   
  
“Maybe I will,” Ren simply shrugged off, and changed the subject right after that. “So what, we’re playing tonight? Something old then?” The dread-hair woman started filling him in with details of what they wanted to play, at that.   
  
Meanwhile, the guy with the ponytail pulled up a chair and sat down opposite of Hux, politely reaching out a hand, “the name’s James. You look like someone way too good to hang out with this shithead.” The comment was obviously a joke, and well, it showed that they were all good friends. Ren made a half-hearted attempt to kick this James from where he sat, not really managing, at that comment. The introduction was obviously an invitation for Hux to introduce himself.   


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> \---- Headcanons and Facts ----
> 
> Music:  
> I know that we said good music, but it was so hard not to make Ren listen to Black Veil Brides... ( this is of course a joke, it's not with our taste of music but nothing wrong to listen at, just a fun stereotype. )
> 
> Ren's inner conflict:  
> It's actually quite difficult to illustrate what a mess he is, while he still functions and focuses so much, as he does in the original Star Wars franchise. The solution was making him do things his own way, and of course letting his aggression be in the way where he actually knows how to handle things well, and means well. 
> 
> OCs for days:  
> Well, yeah, there will be so many characters to fill in the blanks, and they are all original characters, usually not borrowed from Star Wars. Of course, there will be more of the actual Star Wars characters later.


	4. Dear Diary: Ren has weird friends

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "When Ren suddenly and loudly spoke up, he ended up jumping slightly, not expecting him to sound so… forceful and loud. Hux looked at him with a complete loss on his face before he managed to gather himself. Tsk… What was that man’s problem…? First, he was cockblocking him and now he was interrupting with a loud voice. He had someone in his lap, was it too much to ask for that he was just happy with that?
> 
> “Why thank you for the help, Ren… Seeing as we’re the same age, I expect you to follow any and all rules and restrictions you place on me as well.” Hux glared at him, staring the bigger male down."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Playlist for the chapter ( explained in the end notes ):  
> https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLmgJ6IbfmbZrEpEvp9aaCpcvl4-w2y6mb

[Hux]

Hux found himself quite enjoying the music. Not because it was his type of sound but because it was generally pleasant to listen to. Mental note, Ren was good with a guitar. 

The minutes passed on and on, time went by and he learned quite a lot as he was studying. This place really was… pleasant. Even if it was a little bit of a pain to be around so many people, it was almost worth it for the surprising peace that the two of them had. Hah… wasn’t that a cute thought? That they were at ease around each other when they most likely didn’t drive each other nuts just thanks to not talking. Oh well, it seemed to work so why bother thinking about it.

The guitar suddenly made a strange noise, one that caused Hux to look up, his eyes reminding of a frightened rabbit as he tried to judge what had happened. A woman had shown up, hugging Ren with a big grin on her lips. She was not alone… Hux quickly turned to look at all the people that had suddenly gathered around their table. Two males and two females. Two blondes and two dark haired. They all had various degrees of broken clothes and pierced faces. 

He focused on the first female, dreads, piercings, loud, probably smoked a lot, judging by her voice… From the way she clinged to Ren, they had probably been close for a while. The blonde girl seemed to like him too, sitting close to the younger male. She looked… trashy… a little like an outwashed dishrag. The blonde male was… most normal, Hux might even call him handsome, even that piercing didn’t seem all that bad. It fit him well… The last one was longhaired, longer than Ren. The ginger used to think the had long hair but this guy beat him. They all seemed like the black haired, even if they somehow managed to be even… trashier? They looked the same, it seemed like Ren truly had friends. Who knew…? 

The four people surrounded the table, making him feel very small and… misplaced. He slowly curled together, trying not to be seen by them. Of course, he was visible, the red hair had always made it very hard to not be spotted in a crowd. The attention was quickly turned towards him, something that made Hux stretch up, removing his legs from one another so that he sat in a much more proper manner. 

Who is the twink?

Hux tensed up visibly, looking almost shocked before he stared at the man, his eyes full of anger and hatred. The few little positive feelings he had felt disappeared right away, his chest felt cold and anxiety bit in the back of his mind. 

Before he could respond to the male, Ren had spoken up, causing the friends to speak to one another. Hux listened and felt more and more unsure what he was supposed to feel… He… appreciated that his classmate was defending him from them. Wait, did that woman just call him cute? His ears started to turn red but he didn’t like the comment, it made him feel very uncomfortable… Then they blew up with crimson instead, as Ren said something about keeping him… 

“I didn’t know I was yours to keep…” Hux grumbled under his breath, only to turn towards the sound of a chair being pulled up opposite of him. A hand was extended towards him, causing Hux to instantly like this man a lot more. A proper greeting with a handshake and a name. Good. He extended his own, gloved hand towards the male, shaking his hand. People at school had been confused about it before, why was he always wearing gloves? No one had ever asked him straight to his face but if they had, he would have told them that he disliked dirt a lot. He hated germs and such, feeling more comfortable to not take any chances. 

“Hux. My name is Hux.” He glanced over the other highschooler, not sure what kind of reaction he would have. No… he seemed just friendly and… happy. Alright then. “Normally, I would think the same but… It seems like he is quite the good jukebox to keep around.” He tried to not let them see how nervous he was around these, much older, people. Should he smile towards them? No… that would only seem false. He pulled his hand back, letting it disappear under the table. He took a grab of the fabric of his pants, trying to suppress his nervous urges. 

 

 

[Ren]   
The most interesting thing of all, was how well Hux seemed to manage. From all that Ren knew of the kid, he assumed that he would be a lot more visibly nervous, well, that was something. Maybe it was even worth considering whether Hux was actually worthless at interaction with strangers, or if it was better if the kid was comfortable in a situation. A grin spread over the other teenager’s lips when Hux turned red from his comment about keeping him for himself. There was some merit to that, he didn’t want either Mike or Haley to put their hands on the ginger, at all, then he’d rather do it himself, so that the brat wouldn’t be scarred forever; do it himself, as in, he was the better option of the three, not that he planned on it.   
  
When Hux talked back to him, he proceeded to roll his eyes. “As if you wouldn’t like that,” he muttered, evidently amused. He actually… liked the idea of this. Maybe the lonely little rich kid needed to see what adult life was like, in the aspect of how little him being gay actually meant here, and how easy it was to joke about, in such a different manner than in school. Beside, part of the joke, was assuming that Ren would want to keep Hux for himself, which meant that it was pretty much equally hinting on him liking men, so that was not really what the joke was about, in the long run.    
  
James just nodded, somewhat politely; “aye, he’s decent.”    
  
The blonde tilted her head a little. “Hux…. is that a real name or made up shit like his name?” She pointed towards Ren. Said male with a fake name just sighed and rolled his eyes, “no, it’s his family name; has a nice ring to it, doesn’t it?” The answer seemed to satisfy her, and she silenced again.   
  
The woman with dreads seemed to have tired of her hunched position and sat down in Ren’s lap without any warning or shame. To that, Ren placed the guitar on the couch between himself and the ginger, letting it rest against the backrest. She looked at the thin little high schooler. “He’s good for a kid,” she started. “You should stay ‘til seven when they start the open mic event, and you’ll find out just how good he is,” she suggested. “My name is Joan, by the way, and the stoned chick here is Haley.” Even upon being called out on her drug use, the blonde didn’t seem to quite react.    
  
Joan was definitely observative enough to notice the blush on the ginger’s face, when Ren commented about keeping him. Was she… playing older sister and trying to set them up? The black haired teenager couldn’t help but to think that was it, if she invited a prissy little high class nerd like Hux to an event like that. Besides, people would be drunk, later, wouldn’t they. How could the rich kid handle that… hm.    
  
Anyway, he responded to the ‘good for a kid’ comment by bucking his hips upwards once, with a grin, resulting in Joan ungracefully losing her balance for a moment, but not quite falling off. “Who’s a kid?” he commented, knowingly, and Joan just let out a rispy laughter. 

Mike had gone away and came back with coffee for himself and James, and just that.

 

 

[Hux] 

As if you wouldn’t like that? Hux snorted at that comment, stretching his back a little upon looking towards Ren. He seemed a little more in his own element now, or at least, it was easy enough to give sharp, clever comebacks towards people. Especially Ren, who he had detested for long enough to know most about what he disliked about him. “To keep you? Never, judging by your body, you eat a lot. That would be expensive.” 

He was about to answer the blonde girl but noticed that Ren was faster. A little annoyance was starting to form in his chest. Yes, he wasn’t one of them, he clearly didn’t really fit with these people and Ren almost seemed to… talk over him. Didn’t he trust Hux to be able to speak for himself? 

The blonde male with the piercing came back, causing the ginger to look at him again. He… Wasn’t bad looking, definitely not. Not to mention there had been… interest in his eyes when he had called him a twink. Mh… Did that mean… That this guy was interested in… Him? The thought made his heart beat faster, a real, breathing man being interested in him…! Yet Ren was cockblocking him, saying that he was too young for it… Ren was the same age, darn it...And the big bastard definitely planned on banging that girl today, was it so bad that he wanted to experience sex as well? 

The dread haired girl spoke to him, causing the ginger to look up. He seemed rather confused until he realized that she was referring to Ren as she talked about ‘kid’. He had noticed that he was good with music, these people were rather scary but… He glanced at the blonde male, who… was the best chance he had so far in his life. He… wasn’t desperate, no… but the thought of being… with someone. Just once, to not know the pain of loneliness… Wasn’t it okay? To wish for some kind of… warmth from another body? 

Hux looked over at the man with the woman in the lap and then decided that he was old enough to do whatever he wanted, despite Ren’s worry that he would embarrass the goth kid. “I suppose… I could stay for a little.” He turned his focus towards the nameless man beside James. 

“Nice to meet you, what is your name?” He looked the blonde straight into his eyes, trying to make it clear that Ren’s comment didn’t mean anything. How did one make it obvious that he was interested without making it too… obvious. Hux gave him a smile, a small, subtle one. 

 

[Ren]

Fucking Hell-... Of course he could see that. Fucking-... He had known Hux for years, he knew how the kid worked, despite his previous lack of care for the kid; if that flirting wasn’t obvious to Ren, he wouldn’t know what would ever be fucking obvious. If the little brat wanted to get into trouble, and possibly end up hurt, Ren supposed that it would only teach the kid a fucking lesson, because he sure as fuck wouldn’t bother. He definitely wouldn’t fucking bother. Well, the ginger and the others weren’t currently looking at Ren, so they probably didn’t see his gaze darken, and the slightly aggravated sigh he pulled, at that. However, the woman in his lap could clearly feel him tense up, and she looked between the two only teenagers at the table.    
  
Joan had known Ren since… hm… well somewhere around her high school years. She was only four years older than him, anyway. She had known him for quite some time, kind of passively so, until he started showing up at the same places when she was at the University, and she noticed how he had turned into less of an angsty and emotional kid, and more into a broken adult, pretty much like everyone else. Sure, it’s not like they didn’t end up fucking now and then, but to a degree, Ren was kind of the younger brother she never had, and she cared for him, a little more than the rest. It probably had something to do with his age, and probably something to do with those late night talks and just the look on him, because to Joan, he had always been pretty easy to read.    
  
She couldn’t recall a single time when Ren was really bothered by what others did, or if someone he knew decided to fuck someone not so well suited for them. Sure, Mike was a pretty decent friend, but he had this attitude, a little surprising for a gay man, that strangers were only interesting if he could get into their pants. He had caused a lot of tears and controversy, quite some drama, through the three years she had known him. Fair to say, this Hux kid looked much more like a normal kid. Sure, he was tall and well dressed enough to blend in here, but he was much more likely to still be seventeen, by looking at him, than the teenager in whose lap she was sitting. Supposedly, the kid could still be a virgin, or just… well he didn’t seem like the most forward and secure individual. Something obviously bothered Ren, and Ren wasn’t the type to get jealous, even if he would want to get into the ginger’s pants himself; jealousy had never been like him. Hence, there had to be something else that made the man want to keep the older people’s hands off this kid. That was a warning sign.    
  
Even so, she smiled brightly in response to Hux’s comment, and nodded, “then dinner ‘s my treat for the both of you. Ever been here before?”    
  
Meanwhile, the blonde man that had sat down opposite of the nerdy teenager, sipping on his coffee and observing the kid. Upon being asked to introduced himself, he shrugged, and a grin spread over his lips, quite a predatory one, even if it was somewhat charming and evidently polite. “Mike, and the pleasure is all mine,” he responded. It felt good; Ren was a bit of a bitch quite so often. The grown up blonde felt about the same as Hux did about the angsty teenager trying to cockblock him; it was none of the kid’s damn business. It was a little hard not to think about how this lanky and weak young man in front of him was intriguing, and how that was rather pretty. This Hux was pale, freckled, and would probably look good with a few marks and bruises around his ass, and with a flushed face. That he was a minor was a bit of a setback of course, but if the kid wanted him that badly, and evidently flirted himself up like that, he supposed it would be chill enough.    
  
“Careful, kid, he’s a predator,” James jokingly added, and Mike nudged said man’s shoulder, a tad annoyed. “Fuck you, I’m not that bad, not with a decent kid like him,” Mike retorted.   
  
Ren… didn’t respond, he didn’t want to talk to them about this fucking issue, because he was obviously tense and not liking the idea of Hux being around these people all evening. He wouldn’t have minded, actually, seeing that his classmate was managing well enough, now that he had calmed, he wasn’t so out of place, and said kid was a lonely fucker who needed some company. What truly bothered the black haired teenager was that just a few hours earlier, the kid had cried in his arms, shaken and scarred, and definitely not at all prepared to be around a shithead like Mike. Fuck it, perhaps Hux would learn something.    
  
He spoke up loudly, for all around the table to hear. “Let’s just be fucking clear, that if any of you buy out for him, I’ll tell on you.” He sounded serious, and kind of calm. Ren was different, they didn’t even check his ID, but Hux was sure as Hell not drinking alcohol this evening, if he was to stay. Ren wouldn’t even want to think of the headache of how to deal with the kid if he was drunk as well, the taller teenager would worry a damn lot more than he would want to admit, and it would definitely ruin his evening. Besides, it was a policy of this place to throw the person out if they were found out buying out for someone. In Ren’s case, the people that were aware of his age would usually not tell on him.    


 

 

[Hux]   


It… didn’t exactly sit well with the teenager to have someone who wasn’t family pay for him. Of course, he appreciated the offer, not even he was that much of a jerk but… To have one of Ren’s many sexfriends pay for his meal… He wasn’t like the other teenager, he didn’t live on charity. Hux shook his head. “Please, I am fully capable to pay for my own food. But if you insist, I wouldn’t mind another cup of tea.” He looked at Joan as he spoke, before turning to the one who was just introducing himself. 

Mike… So that was his name. Hux felt his heart beat faster at the way the other male grinned at him. It looked like he wanted to devour him, a look that must have been meant to be sexual and that made the teenager’s stomach turn and twist with strange lust. He wondered if that was the way Mike looked at someone when in bed as well… He shouldn’t get this excited from just a look but it made him feel a lot more confident… Haha… to think that he was flirting with another man, so openly, so.. Daring… He had never dreamed that it would be so very easy…! Another smile spread over his lips, this one a little less tense, his blue eyes seeming shinier with relief. 

There were no alarm bells when James jokingly warned him about the other male, there was no worry or panic from Hux. He glanced over Mike again, seeming ever as calm but a little… excited, that was hard to hide. “Predator, huh… I suppose I am not entirely unfamiliar with those.” He was absently playing with his sleeve under the table, nothing but a nervous habit. 

When Ren suddenly and loudly spoke up, he ended up jumping slightly, not expecting him to sound so… forceful and loud. Hux looked at him with a complete loss on his face before he managed to gather himself. Tsk… What was that man’s problem…? First, he was cockblocking him and now he was interrupting with a loud voice. He had someone in his lap, was it too much to ask for that he was just happy with that? 

“Why thank you for the help, Ren… Seeing as we’re the same age, I expect you to follow any and all rules and restrictions you place on me as well.” Hux glared at him, staring the bigger male down. 

 

 

[Ren]    
What an easy prey, Hell if this kid was so openly flirting back, what was the big deal? Besides, he looked like he was handling himself perfectly fine, so what was it that the black haired teenager was so fucking bothered about? Mike didn’t quite understand, if the kid wanted his attention,there was no real problem, was there? Hux seemed like a proper kid, a lot more mature and collected than Ren, and that wasn’t so bad, was it? The ginger could evidently handle himself. There was no real way for Mike to know Hux properly, and from what he saw, he couldn’t see the issue, or what differed from Ren, aside from this one being a tad more smooth and mature.    
  
After Hux’s comment, Ren glared at him, and there was a, to them, very familiar glaredown. Fucking Hell, Hux could be such an ungrateful bitch… Part of the taller teenager would want to let Hux get drunk and regret all his life choices later, but part of him absolutely refused. There was a more protective side of him that wouldn’t let Hux get into that trouble, that just wouldn’t deal with the consequences of it. Fucking-... Here it suddenly suited the rich brat to act all grown up and to give good comebacks instead of the half-hearted emotional shit he always spouted at Ren. The air between the two of them was obviously tense, and the others did watch with interest how their usually really aggressive teenage friend would respond to this.    
  
“Fucking-.. Fine. I won’t.”    
  


There was a silence for a moment before the University students started laughing. Haley looked nearly bewildered and confused, not laughing as much as the rest of them, but rather, she looked confused. “You’re not getting wasted?” she asked Ren, staring with eyes the size of plates, as if it was more or less unthinkable.    
  
“I’m not,” he spat in response.    
  
“Good fucking luck, mate,” James responded to him, grinning big. Hell, this was amusing to all of them, and it was evident that all of them would find it incredibly hard to believe that Ren would stay sober, all evening. Even Joan was staring at him in somewhat disbelief. However, in her case, it only aided her suspicions. Fuck, Ren was serious about this kid, in one way or another. Not serious as in just wanting to fuck him serious, but more… as if he was looking out for Hux, and genuinely worried for his wellbeing. Fuck, that was cute.    
  
This Hux kid was managing quite well, he blended in. It probably aided with the fact that the cutie was probably almost as tall as his classmate, making him at least seem like he could be an adult, as well. Although, if Ren was this worried, Joan figured that it would be something else.    
  
She got up and actually got a cup of tea for the kid, after having asked of what kind he’d want, not minding to treat the kid to that. He was… very different from his classmate. Yet, there was this dynamic between the two, as if they were really close, even in their bantering.    
  
Time passe like that, for another hour. The young adults were talking about just any topic, and Joan had pushed Ren further in on the couch to sit down as well. Random topics about what they would play, since they had to sign up on a handwritten little list by the stage, to put some sort of order into the event. People started filling in. All in all, yeah, they seemed to like Hux, if anything, perhaps Haley was a little confused about him, as if he was a little too nerdy and proper to fit with them. The ginger was, after all, a lot more proper than the whole bunch. All of them took a pause, kinda in turns, to smoke outside, as well, in smaller groups. Mike had invited Hux to join if he wanted some fresh air, mostly to talk. They all ate something there for dinner, and even more people showed up.    
  
Sooner or later this place started to get crowded, and the general drinks that were served started changing, turning this place into more of a bar than a café, really. While James bought a round of beer for the lot of them, Ren stayed true to his word of not drinking. He was, after all, one of the most stubborn men in this universe; he would not lose to Hux. It also became evident that Ren knew a whole lot of people, that crowded this café, even if not all of them. The group of friends that Hux had actually started to blend in pretty well with introduced him to one person after another. One thing was evident though, from that point onwards, they didn’t mention that he was a high schooler, just that he was Ren’s classmate, or friend.    
  
The stage opened and people played. Joan had signed herself and Haley up to sing, starting the evening off with something a little calmer. They sang Here’s To Us by Halestorm, making a bit of a twist with two singing voices. Haley had a much softer voice than Joan, and they had dragged Ren up on stage to perform an acoustic version of the music, to their singing. It was pretty good, as if they had practiced the very song many times before, and people obviously appreciated it. Ren took part in several songs of theirs, but there were also times when he didn’t play. The gang wasn’t really a band, but at least more routined than him. When time started to pass and things started getting a little late, people started getting tipsy and whatnot, Joan pulled in full scale performances with the other people. Haley apparently played drums, and despite being drunk she did a surprisingly good job. James played guitar, and Mike bass, and Joan sang with a lot of energy and spirit, showing that she was rather used to the attention. Love Bites, I Like it Heavy, and lastly when things once more started to calm a little, she sang I’m Not an Angel. It was hard to not think of Ren when singing that song, hah, perhaps she was getting a little drunk and silly in her reasoning.    
  
Ren got a lot of attention from people, but whenever he could, he was around Hux. He wasn’t being all that overbearing, because he lost himself in conversation and other things. However, when people approached Hux, he had a tendency to be kind of close. Not the back-off-bitch kind of close that would make people think he was being aggressive, more like a passively possessive kind. He had pulled Hux into his lap once, since the seats had changed a bit, and they had gotten closer to the stage, meaning that there weren’t always that many seats, and some were pulled aside to create some sort of open area in front of the stage itself. Calmly his arms had rested around his waist, as if it was the most normal thing in the world. He was definitely knowingly in the way for Mike, and it was a lot easier when being sober, admittedly. Perhaps not being drunk one evening wasn’t so bad, and so far, it wasn’t that bad. Hux seemed a little too proper to make too many loud complaints about his classmate putting an arm around him, being passively close, but it definitely upset and confused the brat.

 

 

[Hux]   


It seemed like the idea of Ren not drinking that evening was more surprising than if a green alien with a snout had walked into the café now turned bar. The way everyone reacted made it very clear that he was a heavy drinker, one who got easily wasted and who seemed to like it that way. The woman with the blonde hair was almost cute when she looked at him like he had just grown another mouth, if she had been an animal and not a fully functioning human being… 

Hux got one more cup of tea from the woman with dreads and thanked her politely for it. He might be annoyed with her closeness to Ren (for some reason that he himself had yet to figure out…) but that didn’t hold him back from acting like a proper human being. Not to mention that the tea here was very tasty… 

Hux met a lot of people that night, a few that looked interesting and some others that he might just get nightmares from. Some said a few words to him, some just nodded, people were generally pleasant. Hux tried his best to stay around Mike, or at least a little closer to him to make sure that the blonde didn’t forget about his existence. He felt a thrill of happiness as he was invited to come with him to smoke. Of course, he didn’t like smoking at all but it was actually kind of worth it… He just stayed a little away from the smoke, as to not make the scent get stuck in his clothes or hair. 

The stage opened up and this little band of friends ended up there on lot. Hux was impressed to see just how well they all acted on the scene. Whenever he had the chance, he placed himself closer to Mike, often right next to him but he made sure to never touch the other first. Not even bumping against him. The blonde was charming, it was pleasant to speak to him, even if Hux mostly tried to avoid choosing the topics, prefering to listen to the other speaking or answering basic questions with.. Perhaps not entirely honest answers.

It was hot in the café by now, the heat finally winning as Hux had removed one of his shirts, now only wearing a black dress shirt and his long gloves. They reached up to around his elbows, hiding most of his underarms, the gloves were not visible through the hems though. He had long since put his computer and books away, placing the sweater shirt over the bag. 

Another surprise that night was just how much Ren apparently wanted to get in his way… The man seemed to be everywhere, sometimes showing up and putting an arm around him. As he did that, Hux felt his heart beat faster, feeling the scent of the man’s sweat and of his hair. Ren had even gone so far as to pull him into his lap once, the feeling was so weird and alien to him that he hadn’t been able to help his reactions. His body had felt very hot and his ears had turned red, especially from the fact that Ren of all people, was holding around his waist, far too close to his crotch for it to be comfortable for the ginger. He hated to admit it but he had been aroused by it, having been held like that… He desperately told himself that it wasn’t because of the man himself but because of the position. 

The blonde girl appeared, pulling Ren up on the stage with her and some more of their friends. Instead of staying on the chair alone, the ginger started to look for Mike. He spotted him a little away, he was standing near the more or less bar counter. The teenager got up and approached him, first making sure that the man saw him and then leaned against the excuse of a bardisk right next to the blonde. Finally, he was out of the view of Ren, being able to flash the man a small smile. The excitement from Ren’s lap was still there but his pants were a little too loose for that to be obvious. At least that was what he was hoping for, seeing as 90% of the crowd was drunk. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> \---- Facts and Headcanons ----
> 
> Good music:  
> Halestorm just accidentally fit Joan's voice so well, meaning that if you do want some music with this, reading it on your computer, I made a playlist of the songs. Do keep in mind that it's probably not as well sung and well done as the original performers, when done by amateurs, in the fic. 
> 
> https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLmgJ6IbfmbZrEpEvp9aaCpcvl4-w2y6mb
> 
> Auto-play:  
> Auto-play is the concept of writing for other players' characters, which is very problematic when it's without their consent. We do not normally approve of auto-play, but keep in mind that we are a couple living together, where every time-skip and everything we write with one another can be confirmed with a simple question out loud.   
> Moral of the story: auto-play is bad, but not when it's consented.


	5. Dear Diary: This was all a mistake

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "All the pieces fell into place, oh so fucking easily, all too easily. Now it made so much fucking sense what her friend had been so worried about; Joan supposed that she should never have doubted Ren, from the start. 
> 
> The kid was a mess. "

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WARNING  
> Here comes a chapter including non-con sexual content and it's done somewhat realistically, meaning that it can be very triggering. The chapter isn't  
>  **meant** to be smut or enjoyable, and there is a summary at the end if you do not want to read through. There will be lovely Skywalker-Organa-Solo family content later to make up for it, and good smut ~
> 
> Writing this part of the roleplay made Nathan steadily go into:  
> 

[Ren]

Far from all the slots in the little list of performances had been filled. It was usually like that, it slowly died out when people started getting too drunk to actually perform well. Haley, however, was still up for one, and a lot of the singers that knew Ren personally wanted to make use of the fact that the man, against all odds on the planet, was still sober. It was damned useful for them, meaning that the music wasn’t dying out. On Ren’s part, however, it meant that he was being listed for a lot of songs all of a sudden, without really having consented to it.

Joan was not exactly wasted, but definitely tipsy, and her tipsy tended to be kinda…. Bubbly and giggly. She was being very touchy and cuddly with another girl, and had since a while back given up on singing since her voice was giving in; being a smoker was a little hard on the lungs. James was off somewhere, maybe to the bathrooms, maybe to get a smoke, but he wasn’t visible as it was. Haley was slurring a little with her singing, but wasn’t doing terrible.

  
Mike was… not completely wasted. Hell, he was standing up and managing to have conversations, so so decently at least. He had definitely had a lot to drink, and his gaze was a little unfocused. Of course, when that little cute twink showed up, all smiling and charming, the drunk man gazed around to find Ren on stage. Good, the fucker should mind his own business. It wasn’t that he was scared of Ren, no no, not at all-... He was just sensible as all else, knowing that the fuckwit could be uncontrollably aggressive, and that he was strong as a goddamn bear. It was just self-perseverance, not fear. Now Ren was out of the way.  
  
The blonde grinned, moving a little closer, seemingly to be able to hold a decent conversation over the sound of the crowd and speakers pumping out music. What was definitely not with purpose of making himself heard was sliding a hand around the surprisingly tall kid’s waist, being that sort of tipsy-touchy kind of regular drunk in his behaviour, acting as if it was completely normal. “How’s the evenin’?” He wasn’t really slurring, but wasn’t all that clear either. “Having fun even though he’s clearly babysitting you? Seems the fucker got off your ass, at last.” Mike was pointing towards the stage, and it was probably pretty obvious who he was referring to.

 

 

[Hux]

It was a little annoying to find that this man looked after Ren too, the man had clearly made it seem like he was his guarddog… He was so very much in the way, hovering over him… Ren had no monopoly on him, he didn’t even… He was just trying to make sure Hux didn’t get what he so desperately needed… It felt like a huge relief to no longer have the black haired in his way. Hux glanced over at the stage, stopping as he saw Ren up there, sweaty and concentrated… He was so very… different up there than in school. It was rather… impressive, hah…

He was called back to the moment by an arm that was suddenly lacing it’s way around him. Hux flinched with surprise before his head and body felt a burst of happiness and joy. He was being touched by a man that wanted him… A man that so clearly didn’t mind him being gay or thought there was something wrong with it… The relief and happiness that came from this drunk pulling him closer in what almost counted as a half-hug. God, it felt good… Really good.

Hux decided that he could take his freedom here, moving a little so that he was now leaning against the somewhat shorter male, feeling the warmth from him. He smelled very different than Ren but that was good why the heck would he want someone to smell like that rage filled asshat? This was a lot better, even if he could have done without the booze and tobacco scent.

“I have to admit, I am having fun.” He spoke close to the other’s ear, resting his head on his shoulder. This made his speaking a lot more intimate or at least...that was the plan. Seemed to work. He could feel a tremble through his body, he was shaking just a little with anticipation, nervousness and hope, it was pretty clear in his eyes when he looked up at the blonde. “I had no idea that… I’d feel so much more comfortable with people above me in age. More… experienced... people.” He paused just a little between his words, not too much to make it obvious but at least a little teasing, suggestive.

 

 

[Mike]  
His head was pounding a little, the booze in his bloodstream and getting to his head. It was a fucking relief to be on a high of alcohol, and have a great damn evening in the middle of exams and school life. Fuck, he’d probably skip the lecture, tomorrow morning, given he’d probably have a pretty fucking bad hangover. Worth it.

What was even better, in all this, was how that ginger brat was cuddling up to him, evidently horny. Hell, the kid was still sober, wasn’t he? What a desperate fuck, then. Mike didn’t mind the slutty kind, not at all, and he kind of expected it, or let his mind fill in the blanks with what seemed obvious truth to him, even more so when affected by the alcohol. Of course, such a prissy and perfect little brat had to be one of the slutty and horny ones, who’d want to give himself to a stranger, because let’s be fucking real, they didn’t know each other at all, and the kid wasn’t heeding to any of the warnings of his friends; it was definitely on him if he wanted sex, and Mike definitely wouldn’t complain.  
  
There were many reasons why Ren didn’t want this man specifically to touch his classmate, none of which Mike really cared about, or understood half of, anyway. One of them was that the blonde didn’t give a shit about the kid, not in reality, Hell, why should he care for a stranger? What mattered was that the kid was going to get a dick shoved up his ass, and that he seemed desperate for it, more than that, Hux didn’t matter to him. Besides, that’s why people picked up strangers at bars, right? It was only to be expected; Mike never asked for intimacy.

  
Listening to Hux being suggestive only made the grin on Mike’s lips wider.

“So, have you two actually fucked? I bet he can’t be that fucking good,” he pointed out. Well, he had fucked Ren, but never had the dick of the other up his own ass, so he wouldn’t know, but even so, the aggressive shit couldn’t possibly be that good, at least not better than himself. That sort of inner wish of being the biggest and best, masculine competition and things that would make Ren roll his eyes and just not even start the debate. He didn’t really want to talk about the man on stage, but it was a start to talk about sex, and see where he had the ginger, right of this moment. Besides, the two classmates clearly acted like there was something intimate between them, yet, they didn’t seem to be dating.

 

 

[Hux]

Best thing about this… He would never again have to see this man if he completely messed this up. Hux wasn’t really that stupid to believe that the two of them having sex would mean anything to the male who spewed his alcoholic breath over him. What made him so desperate was the longing for another person’s touch, to know that the world was alright with gays and to know that he wasn’t going to be a virgin until he died. Of course, the man behind the touches didn’t actually matter that much, he was just really, really longing for some kind of intimacy. If he never again saw Mike, that would be okay, hell, that was most likely preferable… It didn’t matter, he just wanted sex, just wanted warmth, just wanted to not be ashamed over the growing member inside his pants. Over how much the other’s hand excited him.

Out of nowhere came a question that he had never in his days been able to seen coming. He flinched slightly and his ears turned very red. “W...what? You think I would ever consider having sex with that emotional brute?” It sounded so unthinkable in his ears that he had no idea what facial expression he should accompany with the sentence, he just stared at the man like he was nuts. “How… I… I would rather have sex with a stick than ever let him inside of me…!”

No, he didn’t have any attraction towards that man at all… He just happened to have a pleasant arse, nice legs and wonderful, warm hands… Not to mention that his eyes could sometimes look so… kind. No… He didn’t have any feelings for him…! Just because he appreciated the way the man happened to look, it didn’t mean he would ever want to go to bed with him. Never…!

He looked up at Mike, was he… amused…? Hux looked annoyed, not sure why the other male had thrown that in his face… “For some reason, he decided that I need to be watched over like some sort of child… Why are you even talking about him? He… doesn’t own me…” The last words were hard to say, not because he was thinking of Ren but… Because he was almost thinking of someone else. He didn’t want to think, he didn’t want to let his better judgement and feelings catch up with him… Damnit… Why had Mike… Why did he have to go and mention Ren?

 

 

[Mike]  
Damn, there were obviously some loaded feelings and emotions between those two classmates. Rather than thinking better of it, especially in a half-drunken haze, it felt pretty good to do something that could get to Ren, not because Mike hated the kid, or anything, not at all, it wasn’t something that deep rooted. He was just a little annoyed with how popular a high schooler was, and that a high schooler was bigger, stronger and more dangerous than the majority of the people in the whole damn bar, and probably the street and all the other places this block to accompany with it.  
  
At Hux’s reaction, the man was clearly amused. What a proper and prissy fuck, he wondered if he could turn him into the slut he expected of him; it seemed very much possible. Besides, he didn’t quite care. It was probably a lot more interesting to be forward.  
  
“Nah, I was just thinking that a decent and pretty guy like you deserved a better fuck than the emotional brute; wanna get out of here?” It was casual, and forward, and not a single bit of shame in it. This Hux seemed so desperate that he wouldn’t bother too much with tricks to get into his pants, if they both wanted it, they should just fucking get on with it.

 

 

[Hux]

Decent… Pretty…

Did he really mean that…? Hux felt his heart beat faster at the compliments, he had never been called pretty before, especially not like this… Not by someone like Mike. His cheeks actually turned red now, the happiness and hope shining straight at the Predator with clear honesty. Yes. Yes, he did very much want to come with him.

Hux never really thought properly about how these things happened, two people met in a bar, got horny and then… They ended up in one of the two’s houses. Actually… how did the walk there go… They never showed that in movie… Was it because it was that boring?

“Yes…!” Oh God no, that sounded way too breathless… He mentally slapped himself for keeping so little control over himself… Ughn… “I’ll just get my bag. Don’t move.”

He was actually pretty fast for his taller body, slinking past the crowd and returned to the man in just a minute. He still looked so very nervous and hopeful, reaching out to take the other male’s arm. That was how one did it… right? He felt his heart throb faster at the prospect of just… being touched. Of feeling good under the hands of someone else instead of… feeling awful and ashamed.

 

 

[Mike]   
It was the small hints, the reactions and ways the kid spoke, but he really seemed to be a virgin. Was that why the brute of a teenager was watching over him like a hawk, if they didn’t have a thing? Mike didn’t quite give two shits if Hux was a virgin or not.

Alright, he was gonna bet on a virgin. The way the ginger turned red and responded with a little too much excitement clearly hinted on it. How fucking cute. A little slut of a kid that wanted some dick inside of him bad enough to go to a stranger for it; this would be enjoyable.

Hux disappeared and came back, and of course, the blonde never really thought twice of the fact the kid got his bag, it only made sense not to leave it there, unguarded, while they were up to other things. However, Mike had never intended to bring someone like this home, or bother like that, he wasn’t interested enough in a child. Besides, it was never really his style to bring strangers home, that you did if you expected to fuck them more than once.

Instead, he pulled the, now noticeably, almost annoyingly tall kid along with him. It wasn’t that much of a bother to be shorter, it wasn’t very noticeable, but somewhere in the back of his mind it nagged him, made him feel inferior, maybe made his masculinity a little tested and sore in ways he wouldn’t understand himself. Made it even better to just think of bending the ginger over and fuck him.  
  
His balance was a little off, but not enough to be visibly a problem, it just made precision a lot harder. There were also people there, on the way, but he never gave two damns if they saw him take a guy into one of the bathrooms. Hell, Mike would definitely not  have remembered to lock the bathroom door behind him after he had shoved the tall twink inside, hadn’t it been for the strong impression and annoyance of how much Ren was guarding this one. Hence, fumbling the lock in place went pretty damn quick. At this point, he just wanted to get off before he got down from his high on alcohol.

He didn’t intend for the charm and the kindness to disappear, he was just a little too drunk to care. Quickly, and much more rough than intended, mostly due to his lack of precision, he got the the business of bending the kid over against the toilet and getting rid of the pants. He didn’t need much more than the ass available. The best way, of course, to hold the other down was by the neck and the hair, depending a little on position. He didn’t expect him to struggle, the kid wanted it, after all. Mike never once considered that he’d want something else than a dick shoved up his ass, and perhaps into his mouth, while at it. He didn’t kiss the other, wasn’t touching him intimately, that was something you saved for lovers. He was also a little too drunk to actually care if the other struggled, at this point, his judgement getting messed up, and it was hard to be precise enough not to accidentally be too rough and hurt Hux just a little. He managed to get the pants off the other and was about to stick a finger up his ass, therefore forcing it into the mouth of the other.

  
During all of that, Joan had just waved the girl she had been goodbye; apparently, she had decided to head home early. The smoker really found this chick pretty, and had gotten an invite to join her after this, or follow her home, where she had declined, already having promised Ren to stay over, tonight. Hell, she would get good sex nonetheless; even if it was a bit of a pity, she would not go back on her word. Instead, they had exchanged numbers, so that was pretty much a score. She had gotten up, deciding that she needed another drink, or at least a smoke, maybe both. For a while, she had looked back at Ren on the stage, amused with how long he was playing, the kid had a lot of stamina, at least, and now that he was sober, he did pretty fucking well. Who knew what a little cute twink could do to the tall teenager…. Speaking of which, where was twink? She didn’t spot him immediately upon scanning the room, and therefore shrugged, and headed to the bar, rather well in time to sneak a hint of Mike pulling the tall kid along with him around the corner. Well, fuck.  
  
Part of her didn’t want to bother, since the kid seemed to obviously want that that guy inside of him, but part of her also felt really obliged to at least fucking check on them. She knew Mike all too well, and it was easy to figure out to what bathroom stall he would go to. The building itself was more than just a café and had a stairway to other rooms that were for other university activities, and storage, the bathrooms were just doors along the corridors and in corners, rather than anything separated into stalls and whole bathroom areas. She figured that it’d be one of those in the corner where he usually headed, a little out of sight, and went over there, listening in. Hell, she felt a little like some sort of secret agent, or spy, but it was just the booze speaking to her, in her head, probably, or maybe her just trying to not worry about the worst possible scenarios. If they just liked what they were doing, she’d just move away again.

 

[Hux]

Ah… of course the other hadn’t planned on bringing him home… Thinking about it again, maybe that was a little… no, very foolish… He trailed along after Mike, letting the other pull him away, over to the toilets. Hux suddenly realized that those toilets were… small. They had to be small, enclosed spaces. He almost stopped but Mike was too fast, pushing him into one of the tiny rooms. The male quickly felt how he was starting to sweat, cold sweating.    
  
“M...Mike?” He tried to not let his voice reveal how the panic was building inside of him as the slightly shorter male was fumbling with the lock. How drunk was he…? “I… I don’t do w-” Before he managed to finish talking, he was grabbed and pushed over the toilet seat, something that made his face heat with embarrassment. So small… He swallowed and struggled under the other male’s hard grip, not so much that it was like fighting, just to try and get his attention. “Mike, it’s… too small…” 

Hux felt how a hand grabbed around his neck, pushing him down over the toilet seat as the second hand pulled on his pants. Don’t panic.. He did want this… it was just… so small… He had to stand it, this might be the only chance he was ever going to get… The hand in his hair was pulling at it, making his face press down against the cool surface of the ceramic seat. That… was surprisingly pleasant, made his cold sweating calm somewhat. 

Uhnn… The other was being rather rough, the undressing went very fast and rather clumsily, he… didn’t get a kiss, there was no stroking or caressing, no more gentle words, but instead a somewhat dirty finger that pushed past his lip and into his throat. Hux gagged slightly but understood what he was supposed to do. He started to lick and suck the finger, trying to busy himself as much as possible to keep his claustrophobia under control. He couldn’t back down now… He might not get another chance… 

It wasn’t like he wasn’t horny, hell, the guilt and embarrassment only seemed to add to the growing heat in his pants. The roughness wasn’t that horrible, the small space was a lot worse, but if he closed his eyes and let his tongue play with the finger, it didn’t seem so bad. 

Something that also became apparent was a secret that Hux had managed to hide from everyone but Phasma. When his sister had been rebellious one day, deciding to get a tattoo, Hux himself had fallen into a wish for a small rebellion as well. As his sister got inked, he himself had decided to get a tongue piercing. It might seem drastic and ill thought through but the mouth was the only place that he was guaranteed to not be discovered in school and where he could easily remove it without leaving a big, visible scar for everyone to see. It was also not noticeable towards their father, which sort of took away the point of the rebellion in the first place… Either way, it was a very strange feeling to have that bony finger brush against his piercing, causing it to move in all kinds of strange directions. 

Yet he didn’t ask for him to stop. He couldn’t, not… like this…

  
  


Mike:   
The kid seemed to get cold feet, which of course, only resulted in Mike giving him even less of a choice, because he might not get what he wanted otherwise. It was that simple, and besides, there were no obvious signs of distress in the other, simply discomfort, and that the kid had to blame himself for; he was the one who consented. Had the blonde been sober, he would probably not have thought things over in the same way, but right now he was too busy forcefully pushing the finger inside the ginger, not caring much to how it would feel for the other. A little pain wasn’t so bad, and it was usually outdone by pleasure, later, besides, Hux had done well with coating his fingers in saliva, meaning that the two fingers that forced their way inside may be a little painful at first, but it wasn’t that hard to get inside, and there was no real warning before said fingers started moving.

Joan didn’t… hear much at all. There were evidently people in there. Perhaps she had no real reason to worry. She wasn’t exactly sure where they were either. Maybe she was just getting worried for nothing, perhaps Ren had spoken out of jealousy, after all, and not concern. It just…. Didn’t seem right.    
  


  
[Hux]

A sharp pain, burning, pulsing as the two intruding digit pushed inside of him, hit Hux so forcefully that he gasped. It made him hate himself so much, that this feeling should bring him to the verge of tears… He was used to the burn of intrusion but it was nothing like this… Mike was obviously far too drunk to be able to treat him carefully. But… the fingers felt a little good, right? If he wished hard enough… would it not hurt so much…? Shutting off his mind and try to just feel good…. 

The fingers started to move and this time, he couldn’t stop himself from letting a pained noise leave his lips. He had to try and get Mike to listen to him. Hux started to struggle now, trying to grab the other male’s arm or hand. 

“Mike… Mike! You have to… move gently… I… I am no...no...ahh… Used to this…!” It was something that in his own head probably sounded like an order but to the drunk hornball, it most likely sounded like begging. “I don’t… Want it t-t-too… just h-hurt… C-calm down… You will get to… just… slow down…” 

  
  


Mike:   
So far so good, not that much of a mess, despite the teenager squirming a little too much for it to be all that nice. It took him a while to at all hear the complaints, and he stopped for a second or so, letting out a somewhat annoyed huff. “We don’t have all eve’, kid, just.. Fucking be still and it won’t hurt as much, I promise,” Mike pointed out, and maybe his voice was slurring a little. He didn’t slow down, besides, it was just two fingers and they slid in pretty well, it shouldn’t hurt that fucking much, anyway. Whiny brat. The promise was clearly just something slurred out to not have to stop, or change his mind. “You wanted this,” he hissed out, between the pushes. By then, he had freed his own erection and pushed it up between the other’s legs, kind of happy that the other was a little taller, when it came to this. Just to get some damn friction from the thighs of the other, just getting himself off, it was kind of evident that it didn’t matter much if the other really felt good, it wasn’t going to be horrid anyway. 

Meanwhile Joan located the voice, and heard some of the words, hell there was no damn sound isolation in any of these doors, making it all too evident when people fucked behind them. The words she heard made her stomach sink a little, but it was… not a call for help, and not a call to stop. She wanted to stop them, she really did, but at this point, it just sounded like the kid was trying to get the drunk man under more control. It shouldn’t be that bad…. Ugh. She remained there, ambivalent to what the Hell she was going to do, or why it would even be her concern in the first place. She just wasn’t someone who could leave someone alone, definitely being way to empathic to even consider it. Damnit…

  
  


[Hux]

They… didn’t have all evening… That… was probably right, actually… He felt shame burn in his chest, it was such a mix of emotions that welled through him, so many things he wanted to say… But people didn’t listen, did they…? If he hurt or not wasn’t a problem, right? That was how one learned from their mistakes, by regretting them and by hurting… 

He felt as if cold realization washed over him, suddenly everything felt so clear… He wanted this, it wouldn’t hurt so much if he just stopped acting so weak about it… He had wanted to be touched by anyone, he had been desperate enough to give himself to this man, who probably had a lot more sex than he ever had… It wouldn’t hurt so much if he could just relax… Relax… relax… breathe… 

The fingers were starting to feel less overwhelmingly painful, even if it was almost… disgusting to be touched by someone he no longer wanted… It almost burned worse than the fingers. 

Hux flinched when something impossibly warm touched between his legs. He flinched and tried to look behind himself, causing the nails of the man to dig into his skin. He quickly stopped with his tries and instead grabbed the seat under him, fighting back all the sickening feelings that pushed through his body. The pain helped to distract him from the small space, as well as the hot, pulsing member between his thighs. He closed his legs a little, trying to offer friction to the other male’s dick. 

You wanted this. 

You wanted this.

You want this. 

“P-put it… in…” His voice was very weak and begging. Not even close to an order this time. 

  
  


Mike:

This was starting to get a lot better, and the twink was being a lot more obedient. Good, it felt good, after all. The drunken haze only made it all the better; the kid was loosening up quite a bit. There wasn’t room for much thinking, the alcohol reduced the man to not much more than his impulses and instincts, which right now was to take the other man. Pushing inside now would probably be painfully tight, but not impossible, and he was too horny to care too much. Had Mike been sober, he would likely have considered that there was no way it wouldn’t hurt the ginger to start pushing inside of him. People often happened to forget that it took time for the body to process the alcohol they drank, which meant that they could get drunker even without drinking more, for a while, before it started toning down again. He would definitely blame the lack of control on being drunk, was he ever to be confronted like this, and he would probably speak of just how much the kid had wanted it, evidently.    
  
He pulled the fingers out of the male below him, spitting on his own hand, seeing that he’d not want those fingers in his mouth after being inside someone’s ass, fuck that. Even drunk like this he’d know it would be disgusting. Luckily, it seemed that the kid was at least decently clean, and perhaps he was a little too drunk to notice whether something had stuck to his fingers. The man leaned back a little and coated his dick in his own saliva, as much as he could. It didn’t have to be slippery and perfect throughout all of it, a lot of people liked it rough, liked when it burned, especially when drunk. Hux was sober, of course, but he couldn’t seem to recall, they were never sober when he was this drunk and bent them over a toilet somewhere. The ginger had clearly just consented again. At least, that was what the man thought, as he grabbed him by the hips and started pushing inside. It wasn’t quite made to fit, not yet, not well enough, but it worked. Sure, the man was average, but he was a somewhat big guy altogether, at least obviously way bigger than the fingers that had previously been inside the kid. 

  
  


[Hux]

He instantly regretted it as soon as he was penetrated by that burning, hot member. He couldn’t hold back the tears anymore as the feeling of something that big was pushed inside. Someplace, somewhere, it might have been pleasurable but to Hux, this was… Too much, far too much. Even someone used to pain, even someone who was taught to not speak against someone older than himself. No, he mind could no longer handle the mix of shame, pain and fear of the tiny room. 

“S...stop…!” That was a very clear voice, only broken by panic and pain. He tried to get away from the man at this point, actively struggling to be freed from the grip. Enough was enough, he… had been quite foolish to let it continue for so long. “I… I changed my mind, stop… Stop, you are...b...breaking… Mike…!” He wasn’t able to finish any one of those sentences, just slurred out requests for him to stop. 

  
  


Joan:   
Fine, okay, maybe she was just being ridiculous and paranoid. It was hard not to worry about someone so young, with a guy who wasn’t the most considerate. Joan didn’t like this, but perhaps she’d just have to accept it. Ren had handled sex with countless drunkards that weren’t really considerate; perhaps the kid could as well, perhaps her friend had just been jealous, all along.    
  
The, now all too sober for her own liking, woman was about to head back into the café-turned-bar to find her friends, when she heard someone, assumably that ginger kid, starting to voice clear demands to stop, clear complaints. He sounded…. Well not good. She froze for a second, feeling cold as ice for a moment, not liking this one bit. The worst part was that the complaints didn’t stop. Fucking Hell, no she was not standing for this. A lot of people would likely hesitate, a lot of people would not want to find out what was behind the door, a lot of people would be worried to get the wrong door, or other consequences; in general, people were afraid to act. Probably part of why Joan and Ren got along so damn well was because the two of them were people that acted, that didn’t hesitate that much, that got somewhere, too forward, focused and reckless to actually think twice. It wasn’t the first time she separated people that had sex where they shouldn’t, for various reasons. She barely had time to think of what a fucking pain in the ass Mike would be about it, it didn’t quite matter right now. It was a regular lock, hence, she just pushed a long thin part of her inverted cross ring to force the lock open. It was supposed to be easy to get into these places in buildings like these, drunkards were dangerous, after all. Perhaps it was a goddamn blessing that she was sobering up.   
  
Mike hadn’t stopped, but he had definitely gotten interrupted, perhaps he was a little more drunk than he had anticipated. He had tried to be nice, really, but the voice didn’t sound very nice as he just threw out promises of how it would stop hurting, telling the twink that he was being a child, that he was being weak, that he should just handle a little more.    
  
There was a loud thud when his back hit the cold tiles of the bathroom walls, opposite of the toilet. It was the little type of square room with the toilet against the wall next to the door, with very little space. He was still close enough to nearly touch Hux, but not really, not anymore. Joan didn’t need to see much to be fucking fuming, being… a lot like Ren at many times, Hell, people often thought they were related, which made some of their public makeout sessions a little awkward. Fucking drunk bastard son of a bitch with no damn self-restraint-... it didn’t take long for her to start scolding him, voicing the fact that Hux was in fact a fucking minor and that this was just fucking cruel. Evidently, she wasn’t scared of Mike, at all, not even drunk.    
  
It was probably self-defense, some sort of defense mechanism brought up, together with a hazed mind, but Mike just got pissed off as fuck at her scolding. Their voices were rather raised, and even if it was a short conversation, it was clear. It wasn’t his fucking fault that the  kid was so desperate to have his dick inside of him. Hux had begged. Hux had wanted it. Hux had clung to him like a slut with no damn thing in mind beside wanting his dick, since they had arrived here. It wasn’t his fucking fault that the kid couldn’t handle himself. He was likely to regret it all when sobering up, but Hell, that didn’t stop him right now from voicing out that the ginger had no one but himself to blame.    
  
He was met with a middle finger pointed at his face, as he spat and left the bathroom. The little power package that was Joan immediately switched focus, evidently still fuming, but forcing control and cool, worry taking over. “Fuck, he’s a goddamn asshole, I hate when he’s drunk and thinks that he can have sex with anything and anyone…. Jesus fucking Christ, I am so sorry, I shouldn’t have left him alone with you, are you okay? Can you stand?” There was so much worry, and kindness in her eyes, and she very much bit back the reminder of how Hux had not heeded a single warning from any of them. She evidently didn’t give two shits about seeing the state he was in, but rather, checked to see that no one else was around, so that Hux could get his pants back on and look a little more decent. He evidently wasn’t fine. It led to the university student pulling him out of there, once he was as presentable as he would get, seeing to grab his bag on the way; she would definitely not have noticed unless she had nearly stumbled on it, on her way out. In many senses like these, when it came to determination, her brown eyes probably reminded a lot of Ren. 

There were, as mentioned, several floors in the building, and sure, a lot of people used them to sneak away and be all over each other, trying to find privacy, but it was easy to tell if there was a corridor and space clear of people, and the third floor was. When they were finally alone, she looked up at the tall kid, when they were in a place where they were alone. “Are you okay?” No one wanted to be seen by everyone or forced into a crowd of people when they were hurt like this, and she didn’t quite care if she overstepped boundaries by seeing him, herself, because fuck, she was too worried about Hux to leave him be.    
  


  
[Hux]

Of all the things that Mike had said, calling him weak had hurt the absolute most, at such a level where he thought he might just fall into an anxiety attack. It was getting impossible to see the room through the tears, it was getting impossible to focus on anything but the rough thrusts and the promises were all that remained with him. Hux wasn’t struggling but he was still begging the other to stop, to not be this forceful. The worst part was that a tiny voice in the back of his brain was enjoying this, enjoying very much to not have to think and only feel. Perhaps pain could be pleasurable if one only wish hard enough… 

No, no, no… It hurt too much, sex was supposed to feel good, this was just… not right… right? Bite down, just a little longer, don’t be so weak… Weak… weak… The pain was suddenly ripped away from him, causing the younger male to more or less fall over against the wall, his whole body was shaking but his legs were the worst. 

At first, he thought that Ren had showed up, his position from the floor disorienting him quite a lot. He heard her voice and realized that this was the little woman whom had been sitting on Ren’s lap before… Who bought him some tea. He had a little hard to catch up with what she was saying but she clearly wasn’t happy with Mike. 

He had wanted it, he had begged for it, he had been acting like a slut. W-wait, when had he done such a thing? That… Hux felt his face turn red with shame, looking up at the other man with eyes filled of betrayal and pain. Even if he had been desperate and begged for it, it… It was his fault, yes but… Wait, was he leaving… He almost tried to get up after him. “M… Mike, wait, I… I didn’t mean t-to…” He was gone and Hux was left with her instead… 

He felt like everything went in a daze, being pulled out of the small room (thank God) and pulled away further. He wasn’t sure why they didn’t leave the building but went up instead… Until they got to an empty corridor where Hux felt quite uncomfortable to be alone with a woman, even if she had a few points that looked like Ren. 

When she stopped, he made quite evident that he didn’t want to touch her, instead moving away from her to sink down against a wall, it hurt so much… Everything hurt, his body, his… butt, his head and his chest. He was still on the verge of a panic attack, heart beating way too hard and his breathing way too fast. There were clear traces of tears on his face and his neck ached. 

“I… I… I am… He… I am sorry, I… He… he is right… I shouldn’t have… I just… I wanted i-it… b-but he was so rough, I… I thought I would b-break… I didn’t really want him to stop altogether… I… I am so sorry…” He didn’t really seem to be able to see her anymore, staring down at a spot on the floor with wide, frightened eyes. “He is right… Where… I have to apologize… where… did he go?” 

  
  


Joan:   
All the pieces fell into place, oh so fucking easily, all too easily. Now it made so much fucking sense what her friend had been so worried about; Joan supposed that she should never have doubted Ren, from the start.    
  
The kid was a mess.    
  
The worst part was that he was a sober mess. When people were drunk and acted out, they often reacted like this, but they’d be fine in a little bit, their senses were so confused with the brain put in the alcoholic blender, that they panicked and got emotional and prioritized wrongly, Hell, it happened all the time.    
  
Now this, this was different. This tall kid was completely sober, and not particularly affected by anything but the shock of what just happened. Yet, he was on the verge of what looked like a panic attack, and immediately went into a spiral of self-destructive thinking, of blaming himself unnecessarily. His emotions were up the walls, over something so simple as this, and something he had seemingly been able to handle. 

The short woman hesitated only for a moment, feeling dread in the pit of her stomach. It was-... weird, the sort of feeling of that the boy in front of her was so fragile that doing anything could just make it worse. Of course, much like her friend Ren, that worry only lasted a few moments until she got pissed off at Mike, at the world, at herself and a little bit at Hux for what he was saying. “Hux,” she demanded, clearly, sternly but not at all aggressively. “It is not your fault, at all.” There was an intensity to her, and a burst of energy and life in the brown orbs looking at the ginger, that was likely to remind very much of someone else. “Mike has no right to be that violent, and he’s a fucking shithead when it comes to sex. It is  **not** your fault. Don’t go to him, he’ll just be worse. It won’t help.” 

She paused and swallowed, wanting not much more than to hug the poor thing, but it was clear that he didn’t want to be touched. Ugh.    
“I should… go get Ren for you,” she spoke. It felt obvious, seeing that the two seemed quite close to one another, with a lot of unspoken sexual tension.    
  


 

[Hux]

Ugh… There it came, all those stupid, pathetic reassurances… The things people always said on movies and TV shows when someone had been hurt by another person. They never, ever considered that the one crying could have done something wrong, instead, they always took the side of the hurt one, most likely out of pity. Mike was very much right, he had wanted sex and he had been desperate enough to ignore all the warnings and signs that he should stop, instead, he had eagerly jumped at the chance to get fucked, believing that he could actually handle whatever pain that came with it. 

Slut. Weak… weak slut. 

The way the girl reminded him of Ren actually just made it worse right now, he didn’t need that perfect example of a man mock him further for being weak… Just because Ren was bigger and… and everything else that Hux wasn’t. 

The more he thought about it, the more he was convinced that it actually hadn’t hurt that much and that he was probably overreacting… Mike… was most likely right, if he was more used to men… It could have felt better if he hadn’t tightened up so much from… from being weak… He had been erect, he definitely had and he was still semi hard from not getting to finish… 

Hux used the wall to push himself up, promptly ignoring everything that the female was saying. “You don’t say a word to that… moronic… piece of… You have nothing to do with anything… Stay out of it…!” His feelings had turned to hatred towards the people around him, even if he knew that she wanted to help, it only made him all the more determinate to show that he hadn’t done anything worthy of their false pity. 

He grabbed his bag and turned around from her, trying to walk as steadily as he could, somehow hoping that that would prove himself stronger then they all seemed to see him. If he had to guess, he would assume that Mike was out smoking, that was what most smokers did when they were stressed or upset. Hux ignored the girl behind him, if she said something, he didn’t hear and didn’t care if she said. 

The cold air felt wonderful against his face, it was such a relief to feel the cold bite into him. On his way down the stairs, he had done his best to rub his tears away, looking more than ready (he hoped,) to find and talk to the blonde. There were many people around here, the smoke from their mouths seeming so… menacing… And he, in return, felt so small… Mike… It was good that he was tall, not that it helped that much when it was this dark outside… What time was it even…?    
  
“Mike…? Excuse me, Mike?” He started to navigate the crowd, holding on to the rem of his schoolbag hard enough for his hand to go white under his gloves. There were a few people that turned when he spoke but it became evident rather quick that he wasn’t here. 

Hux stopped a little away from the smokers and pried his hand away from his bag. As he dug through his pockets, he tried to not think about how open his body felt, how raw and exposed he felt even with clothes on. He located his phone and felt his heart fall further as he realized just how late it had gotten. He should have been home long ago and the list of missed calls that lined up to five informed him that his father wasn’t happy at all about his absence. Without even leaving Ren a thought, he hurried away from the bar. The station wasn’t too far away, he could take a cab from there to get home faster than walking. Never, ever in his days would he take the public transportation. The mere thought of such a thing was more disgusting than the idea of having intercourse with Ren. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Summary:  
> Hux thinks it's a good idea to have sex with Mike, only to find that a careless, emotionless fuck in a public, dirty bathroom, with a drunken stranger, is far from anything he has ever wanted, only, Mike won't let him get away. Joan saves him, and Hux, now filled with guilt and self hatred, convinced it's all his fault and on him, heads home without a word to Ren.


	6. Dear Diary: Ren wasn't supposed to become important

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "He turned around, managing to snap out of his thoughts and looked at her. “Why yes, me and that brainless killer whale, in a t-shirt, were kidnapped by aliens last Wednesday, and taken aboard a spaceship. We were held captured for three hours and were then returned to Earth on a cow farm outside the city. Any other questions?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's getting increasingly hard to keep chapters anything but incredibly long. This should be a reasonable cliff hanger to end at, however.

[Ren]

His fingertips were starting to get damned sore from the continuous playing without a plectrum. Besides, most of the people still singing were slurring enough to make the lyrics incohearable; in short, perhaps it was time to lay down for the evening. It was getting pretty late, anyway, and the teenagers had school the day after.   
  
Further reason was how skittish it made him feel to be so sober. Hah, well fuck, maybe it was even depressing to see so many people whom he knew were as messed up as himself, laughing and enjoying themselves, only the booze capable to make them truly confident and relaxed. Perhaps, he was projecting a little bit, not every single young adult in the room could be an absolute mess, but it felt like it, in times like these. Maybe it was a little bit distressing to coherently think through all of this, although, he’d be damned if he lost a bet to the little arrogant snot of a ginger-... where the Hell was Hux? 

He did not like the feeling like there was a deep pit in his stomach, the equivalent of staring down a dark and deep hole, really fucking ominous one, having no way to tell what was on the other side, leaving all the horrors up to his own imagination. Common shit really, that twisted feeling of starting to imagine a lot of uncomfortable things; it almost felt like the first few times it looked like his father was going to leave the family once and for all, when Ren had been old enough to comprehend the shit they were fighting over day in and day out; it ended by the time he realised that the man was too much of a coward to leave, so just a few years later.

  
Well fuck, he supposed he would just go and have to find the fucking runt, to settle his damned emotions, that his far too sober mind wouldn’t just let go of. He didn’t like worrying about worst case scenarios, not one bit, it made him want to punch a wall, mostly because it had caused him so much fucking stress in his younger teenage. It was part reason for his whole damn carefree attitude, that worked just fine, if he didn’t have to babysit idiots; maybe having brought Hux was a mistake. Eh, no, he should just fucking chill and realise that he would calm down again when he found his classmate, because he was likely just fine.   
  
Still, where the Hell had Hux gone if he was nowhere to be seen inside the café-turned-bar. He didn’t like it, pretty damn obviously, but honestly, the teenager could just as well have ended up having a nice discussion with someone, or went outside to get some air, maybe a fucker somewhere was sober enough to have a somewhat decent conversation the way Ren would know the ginger to enjoy them.

The first face face he found that could be a clue to his little detective adventure was Mike, who seemed to be slurring beyond fucking belief… fuck he looked tragic when he acted like he could stand up properly, talking to some guy Ren had a fair suspicion seemed rather desperate, or he would probably be less impressed with the way the wasted blonde acted. Somewhere inside of him, there was a bit of relief that the man had found another prey to try to get inside the pants of than Ren’s classmate. Well, he couldn’t fucking care any less. The tall teenager went straight up to the duo at the bar and grabbed Mike by the shoulder, not aggressively or or particularly hard, simply steadily, forcing the man to turn in his direction.   
  
“Hey, where the fuck did Hux go?” he voiced, not feeling like he had any fucking time for wasting time on drunkards.   
  
Pretty damn predictable, Mike immediately pushed at him, trying to shove him off, letting out a borderline aggressive groan when he found that the giant of a teenager wasn’t budging one bit. This could, of course, go two ways, depending on just how deep under the blonde shithead was, somewhat as expected, it went the way of Mike realising that the only way to make the teenager get off his case was to give some sort of answer, precisely what Ren needed. The slurs weren’t all that coherent, but sounded an awful lot as something along the lines of that it wasn’t his fucking concern where the jailbait had gone, and that he was busy. Alright, seemingly not with Mike then; Ren just shoved him off and headed out of the bar, hoping to find wherever the kid was hiding.   
  
The more time passed, the more his patience was tested, and patience wasn’t exactly his most prominent skill, rather the opposite. It was like the ginger had just gone up in smoke and disappeared. It wasn’t until he managed to get a hold of Joan again that she pointed out that the kid had probably left.   
  
Well fuck it, then. He wasn’t about to spend any of his time being upset that the prick wouldn’t even tell him when he was leaving, rather, it felt like he should have expected the sort of behaviour from that little shit, he probably didn’t even know how to act around friends, didn’t seem like the type to have any, really, either. Hence, Ren just decided to forget it, he could question the idiot in school later, and for now, just spend a cosy evening with a friend.   
  
Something he didn’t like, however, was how something was evidently bothering Joan that evening. Well, that could be just anything, and she kept insisting that she was fine. He couldn’t be arsed to worry. Actually, he had definitely filled his worrying quota for at least the rest of the month. He really shouldn’t stress himself out like that. He didn’t mean to drink that much on a late Wednesday evening, but shit happens.   
  
Next day, Hux wasn’t in school, but at least, after asking a teacher, it seemed that he had called in sick, and thus, at least he was home and safe, and not dead in a ditch somewhere. It was a wonder that Ren managed school that day through what was pretty much an epic headache, but Hell, it wasn’t the first time, if he just looked pissed off enough, people wouldn’t bother him. It wouldn’t be the end of the world that he could barely hear the teacher.   
  
Friday arrived, and Hux still wasn’t in school; had he managed to get sick as well, perhaps. The sister’s flu could easily have gotten to someone as weak as Hux, Ren reasoned. Eh, it wasn’t the end of the world, he’d just go about his business again, although, the rest of that week was, in fact, rather boring. He wasn’t lonely or anything, he just didn’t like his ‘friends’ in school all that much, and without the stuck up siblings, it simply was rather boring.   
  
At least his dad was home during the weekend, it seemed. Ren agreed to return on a deal of no discussions, terms of ceasefire really, in return that he would cook dinner for the bunch, and so he did. It was awkward, it tested his sanity, the whole room just oozed of his mother wanting to say so many things to him, that he wouldn’t like to hear, but she held back, for the sake of their little treaty. There was something unnerving about seeing his parents being close and romantic with each other, apparently, this was one of those times were the fuckers realised they missed one another when away, God knows for what reason though, Ren didn’t get it.

Having slept in his own bed and not being high or drunk made it surprisingly easy to get up and be arsed to get to school in time, early even. Good for an early morning smoke. More like, he hadn’t been able to sleep and couldn’t help but to leave before six, knowing well that his family wouldn’t be awake at the time. It also made for less questions, when he threw old clothes in the laundry and got new picks for at least half a week, packed down in his bag. Arriving early in school meant no fuckers disturbed him, or asked why he had an extra bag packed when there wasn’t any P.E. lessons scheduled that day. Besides, he was feeling… okay. Today was an okay day. 

Furthermore, the rich kid duo was back in school, it seemed. Phasma looked a little out of it still, like she was forcing herself to school even when she shouldn’t, it didn’t take away any of her generally threatening aura to most, really, but to Ren, it made her look a look a little out of it, and weaker. Before the siblings had arrived, Ren had passed by their lockers, and seen some new scribbles on the ginger brat’s locker door, that he had actually made the fucking effort to wash away, properly. Hell, the bathrooms were right there opposite of them, in the corridor, and it wasn’t that much of an effort to just take a piece of paper, wet it, and scrub the scribblings off. He wasn’t entirely alone, of course, but it didn’t matter to him if people saw him, it wasn’t any special kind of gesture. It would just cause more of a headache if the kid went all pouty about being called gay again, as if that was supposed to be a real insult.

Perhaps Hux had gotten sick, after all, he didn’t seem all that well either, and his eyes were glazed in that way someone would if they were overexerting themselves a little. Still, Ren didn’t care much as he simply approached the other at the lockers, casually, at that. He wasn’t intending to seem like he was cornering the kid, it probably had more to do with his sheer size than it had to do with his body language at this point, well, perhaps a little bit of body language, instinctually so after having the ginger just bail out and disappear last week.   
  
“Do you usually sneak off into the night without saying shit to the people you’re with?”   
  
Maybe a little salty for having been worried for nothing, just a little bit.   
  
“I hope you’re ready for the quiz today, don’t let my work be for nothing,” he pointed out, knowing well that they were supposed to be writing down a few short things on ancient civilizations during the History lesson. All in all, he wasn’t very angry or aggressive, it felt a little more natural to speak to the ginger now than it had previously.

  


[Hux]

Life was a lot better with Phasma in school again, at least 135% better. All in all, it was very nice to have his sister to, uh, rely on when people in school ended up being predictable and small minded assholes. Hux walked over to his locked, shutting out the world from his mind and just focused on trying to remember what classes were today.

Unfortunately for him, his memory was interrupted by someone talking to him, causing him to raise his head. By pure instinct, he took a step to the side when he spotted Ren looking down at him. Despite them only being a few centimeters apart, the dark haired always ended up feeling so big, especially when he was this close. Then he recalled that the dark haired man hadn’t been that horrible to him lately and so, he managed to find his footing.

Hux looked straight into the locker, definitely not avoiding to look the man in the eyes or on his face, he just needed his books, definitely. He felt tired, and his body ached, despite washing himself at least ten times the past four days, the feeling of being unclean hadn’t disappeared. This had come with a horrible itch on his arms, especially the wrists. He was lucky that his gloves were in the way for him to be able to itch them right now or he might have broken the skin.

He let out an annoyed sigh as he picked the books from his locker and stuffed them into his bag, still not looking at the man beside him. “What do you want, Ren? You dragged me to that place and I left. I don’t remember having an agreement that I would tell my captor before I left his dragon cave.” He slammed the locked shut, a lot harder than he meant to and locked it. Upon tucking his keys in his back pocket, he ever so slightly glanced at the other’s shirt, coming face to face with a band logo. It said, simply, Ghost. “Ah. Good to know you’re not among the living anymore. I won’t cry at your funeral. Now leave me alone.”

  


[Ren]  
That was, in fact, a lot braver than the not so little twat usually dared speaking up against him, even more so face to face, whereas normally, he would wait with rudeness and retorts until he was safe behind his sister. Perhaps something had changed last week, perhaps not.   
  
When insulting Ren, there were certain protocols to follow for it to work. It was, contrary to popular belief, rather difficult to actually offend him. Being taken for granted offended him, having his efforts rejected and devalued offended him, truth, on rare occasions, could offend him more than all, but perhaps, truth rather hurt than offended. Sometimes the schoolground menace would act like he was offended, only because it would make it seem like he tolerated a lot less than he actually did, meaning that people wouldn’t dare pulling shit on him.   
  
Hux was, for the moment, speaking nonsense that could in no way get to the taller of the two. Actually, being compared to a dragon was rather cute, a little amusing in a way the edgy teenager enjoyed, there was nothing wrong with that. Besides, no one could in any way cheat the black haired teenager to believe that Hux hadn’t wanted to be there, at least to begin with. In fact, the ginger seemed to have enjoyed himself, and perhaps, to some degree, it had worked to show him that there were people out there who wouldn’t give two flying fucks that he was gay, or tease him for it, for the matter; they had sort of established that he was into men, anyway, but too young for the crowd, out loud, and that would kind of spread in a somewhat casual way; besides, Hux really did look as gay as they come, despite the ginger himself evidently disagreeing on that point.  

Retorting, at this point, wasn’t even hard. Ren sort of just smiled, amused. What a fucking twat, but not the kind of twat that made him want to break his nose, rather, the sort of twat that was very easy to mess with further. Besides, he had to give it to the ginger nerd that the comment about his shirt was clever enough, and a little funny.   
  
“I don’t know, sensible fucks usually at least let people know they didn’t die in a ditch somewhere, but I guess that’s beyond you, princess” he retorted, somewhat mockingly, but lazily even then. It seemed like the two of them were able to banter the way he and Phasma usually did, what a… pleasant surprise? Maybe, it could go downhill quite fast. Hux really had the princess retort coming, after comparing Ren to a dragon. Besides, the boy was the clever sibling, which meant that the banter meant something more and was less predictably stupid.   
  
He was about to say something more when he glanced down at his classmate, still a little unused to how he nearly reached his height, at this point, and his thoughts were interrupted with a realization.   
  
Was Hux wearing makeup. Uh, it sure seemed so. That was… well not gay, but it kind of fit his image a little bit. Though, not that it said much of accuracy, but Ren couldn’t recall ever having seen such a thing before, maybe the kid did on regular occasion, maybe not. It showed a little with what seemed to be concealer under the ginger’s left eye, where it had lumped together enough to create a not very smoothly blended line; it would probably have been very hard to see if one wasn’t this close.   
  
Without putting too much thought into it, he looked around just once, to see that people were minding their own business, before he grabbed Hux’s chin and quickly, but at least decently carefully, used his thumb on the opposite hand to blend out that dot of makeup, until it wasn’t visible anymore. The reasoning was simple, really, the twat would experience Hell again if his bullies figured out that he was wearing makeup, too. The fact that he could just have told Hux so that he could go, just across the corridor, to adjust it himself, didn’t even occur to Ren. He was the sort of person who often chose physical contact before not having it, and it made him forget himself, after being closer to someone, like, say, when they cry in your arms for half an hour. For all it was worth, Hux had soft skin.   


The gesture was silent, if Hux wasn’t a complete fucking idiot, he would get what Ren had done, and afterwards, he closed his locker and headed towards class. His mind quickly fell into thoughts of other more pressing matters than disastrously emotional and gay twats, like the fact that he had seen a glimpse of that girl, heading to class, meaning that she was back in school again, as well. She had somehow managed to avoid him, but now, he’d fucking find her again.   
  
As Ren left, he never noticed the silent shock he had left a certain big and broody young woman in, who had witnessed how he just gently touched her brother’s face. She had seen why and what he had done, of course, even if that had taken a moment to realise. What had happened while she was gone…?   
  
One didn’t need to be the brightest person on the planet to realise certain things when living with someone, one of those things, in Phasma’s case, was her brother’s complete lack of interest in women. Hux had never said it straight out, and of course, with the reactions their dad would have, it only made sense if her brother kept it a secret that he was probably more into men than women. It was the subtle things, like where his eyes actually strayed and who they were gazing at, like the time she had forced him, when they were much younger, to take her friend out on a date and he had not managed to show a single bit of interest in her, and hadn’t wanted to touch her, well, it had been a disaster to tell for another time. Also, things like having grown up with someone, making it a little easier to know when something made them uncomfortable, and no insult hurt her brother more than being called gay. It had taken years, but it kind of just, added up. Yet, she wasn’t exactly the sort of person who would talk it out, and it didn’t seem like her brother had ever wanted to, either, meaning that she never really mentioned it. She didn’t mind her brother probably leaning towards being gay, it kind of… suited him. What she did mind was the absolute trash of an addict and shithead being all close and touchy with her brother. Eh, how does one approach these things. Hux was the sort of person who was silent most of the time, not striking up conversation, rather, he was a listener.   
  
“Did something happen between you two last week…? Was that why you came home so late?”   
  
Perhaps a little blunt and straightforward, but the blonde girl had little to no reference of other ways to go about it. Her voice touched at disbelief; when Ren had first approached Hux, she had been ready to push him into the lockers, only to find, that the trash wasn’t even being particularly rude. What the fuck.   
  


[Hux]

He couldn’t stop himself from retorting back to the other, they had always had a little bit of that bantering going on, but only when Hux felt safe enough to hide behind his sister, so the face to face yapping was somewhat new. A tiny part in the back of his head reminded him that Ren was a borderline nutcase, but it somehow seemed a lot less likely that he would get a fist through his teeth if he spoke back to him. Something that didn’t change, however, was the ginger’s sarcasm. His weapon of choice, that he used to hide pretty much anything that resembled true feelings.

“Assuming that any so called ‘sane fucks’ would hang out with you, Ren.” He crossed his arms over his chest and leaned just a little on one hip as he lift an eyebrow up at the muscular teenager. “You wouldn’t have had to worry, if I had died, I would have written your name in blood next to me so that they would be able to track you down and lock you up for your crimes against humanity.”

They stared at each other for a little bit until Ren suddenly reached out and grabbed his face. He felt panic surge through his body and his mind told him to duck and cover, preferably in the safe shadow of Phasma Hux, yet the touch was so unexpected that he simply froze, trying to comprehend what was going on as another big hand slowly approached his face. The thumb connected and started to rub him, leaving the ginger to believe that the stray dog had gone completely bonkers. What was he doing? Was this Ren-speech for ‘you are now my bitch and I will pet you.’

Then it was over and the menace of a man turned around and left, leaving Hux in a complete mess of conflicting emotions. It took him just a little longer and then, he came to a horrifying conclusion… Ren had seen the makeup. This lead to the realization that the man had not only seen the makeup but corrected it? That was… even harder to believe… He couldn’t exactly see his own face, but Ren’s hand hadn’t been dirty, so the likeliness that he had just smeared, oh he didn’t know, darkness or something, on his cheek was not very high.

Normally, Hux would not wear makeup. He didn’t particularly like it and knowing what some of that stuff was made out of, he was more than happy to skip it. Not to mention that it would not aid in his claim of not being gay, if someone came close enough to notice it. Despite all that, ever since the party, the ginger had not been sleeping well. In fact, he had slept so badly that Phasma had thought he really was sick and not just staying home because she wasn’t able to be his shield. When he had looked himself in the mirror that morning, he had found that he was pale as snow and with giant dark marks under his eyes. Looking like that would have cause a bunch of questions that he didn’t want, worst case scenario, Ren would connect two and two and start asking about what actually happened at the party. He did not want that.

Speaking of things he didn’t want. Phasma talked to him.

He turned around, managing to snap out of his thoughts and looked at her. “Why yes, me and that brainless killer whale, in a t-shirt, were kidnapped by aliens last Wednesday, and taken aboard a spaceship. We were held captured for three hours and were then returned to Earth on a cow farm outside the city. Any other questions?”

  


[Ren]  
Armitage Hux was probably the only person who could snap like that at Phasma, making her feel stupid for having asked, without expecting a punch in the face. She would never admit to it, but it wasn’t unusual that she was even more aggressive than Ren. All in all, the giant of a girl hated being talked down to like that, sarcasm made her feel like an idiot.

However, her brother was making it awfully clear that he did not, in fact, want to share anything about his adventures last week, and while that was a tad worrying, Phasma did not believe that said brother would make any real bad mistake. She didn’t like the prospect of him having spent time with Ren though, the drug addict didn’t deserve to even be in the same room as Hux, they were on completely different levels. Besides, her brother had been unusually shut in and down since last Wednesday, meaning that part of her suspected Ren of having done something bad. If he had, she would kill him, without a moment’s hesitation, however, they didn’t act like he had, because Hux seemed less scared of Ren then he had ever been before, so perhaps not, and he had just…. Helped her brother with his makeup…? She did realise that he had a little makeup on him, she had seen how he looked when he woke up, before he applied it.

Phasma was simply left wondering, as the day passed on, and Ren was very strangely different around Hux, at least according to the sister. The two of them were acting like… friends? Friends, in a sense of what those two idiots were capable of. The tall kid wasn’t leaving the ginger be, and kept on talking to him like he expected something different than sarcastic aggression in return. It almost felt relieving to Phasma, even if she was a little ashamed to admit, that she didn’t have her brother tailing after her, at all given points. She hadn’t minded that much, but there had been many moments in her life where she had been annoyed with having to act like a wall of safety for her brother, and how people teased her for constantly having to protect him. The more time passed, the more the sister calmed, because aside from the fact that Ren wasn’t the best type to be around, at least the shithead was treating Hux fairly, and kept other shitheads and bullies away in her stead.

While it looked to the world like the ginger brat and edgelord were getting along, that was far from what Ren was experiencing. It wasn’t the end of the world, but he wasn’t sure why he kept on getting this overly negative responses when he now had awareness that Hux could, in fact, be decent to hang around; it really was obvious that the twat was avoiding him, but strangely, it wasn’t as annoying as it could have been. Like always, the ginger was still there in the background, except, next to him a little more often than not. It seemed that shitheads simply left them both alone, and when they didn’t Ren didn’t mind showing them exactly why they should leave them both alone.   
  
The overgrown teenager started finding a bit of joy in small things, and small victories, like look on the ginger’s face when Ren reached out and ruffled his hair out of place, all of a sudden; the look was absolutely priceless. Besides, Hux’s hair looked better that way, the teenager seemed completely fucking oblivious to the fact that he looked less like the sort of twat that could be bullied, and a little more hipster that way, in a fashionable way. Ren started enjoying those times where he completely outdid Hux in comebacks of conversation, and the challenge of it, because honestly, the prick had his ways of going too far, rather than saying clever things, and it could be frustrating and aggravating.   
  
He did believe that he liked the fact that Hux was less scared of him, but he wasn’t sure. He was letting the rich kid step over the boundaries he kept people outside of, the one where they expected him to snap and strike at any moment, which kept them from going too far or getting too close. It wasn’t like his classmate would treat him nicely or with care, Hux seemed completely unable to do that, or consider people’s feelings towards what he was saying. Yet, it felt better than the kid cowering behind his sister at all times, a lot better, actually.   
  
Speaking of boundaries and lack of respect. That Rey girl just wouldn’t fucking stand down, no matter what he did. For the past weeks he had been called to the Principal’s office thrice because of her, and how she seemed to think it was somehow heroic to get into his personal space and show how she wasn’t scared of him. The fact that she never gave in made it not worth it, in the end, he’d get into serious trouble if he went too far, and apparently, the girl took it as victories. That of course, was also complete idiocy; how on Earth was it a fucking good thing that she was willing to go too far, where he chose to be a reasonable human being. Fuck he hated these fucking teeangers and stupid kids; to the girl, it seemed like she was just ridding the school of some evil terror, always taking the side of those that continued to test their waters in their ability to terrorize his everyday life, out of stupidity or curiosity, he didn’t know.

Luckily, Ren had gotten along pretty damn well with Principal Snoke ever since he enrolled in this particular school. He had gotten himself into shit rather early, and found that school principal was a good listener. The man enjoyed some of the music that Ren was into, and most of all, listened without judging. So far, Rey was the only one that had gotten into deep shit for her antics in school, because Snoke understood that this was about her pestering the teenager to a point of snapping, rather than him stepping out of his own boundaries. She was often upset, arguing that Ren didn’t have the right to act and snap even when she was the one who started it, or provocated him, yet, Snoke still took his side, which was a pretty fucking damn relief.   
  
Hux wasn’t as much of a pain as the rest, and started becoming a bit of a relief. Ren did have other friends, of course, but they had very little real interest in him, and they were obviously more fascinated by him than they cared, which was just fine really, he didn’t need people to be closer to him than that.

After two weeks there was yet another victory, one that made him feel pretty fucking good about himself. Hux very often chose to insult his taste of music, the tiniest little bit of leakage from his headphones, and the ginger was at it about the supposedly tasteless screeching noises. This once, the stuck up fucker actually asked what he was listening to, of course, he seemed to try to make a gesture of not actually caring about the question.   
  
Instead of simply answering, Ren reached up to grab his headphones, pulled them off his head and simply put them over the pale ears, not so accidentally messing up Hux’s hair a little in the process. Music often varied for him, even if anyone that asked would get a few different branches of the rock genre thrown at them, often pretty old things, and classic rock. Still, any person varied their music a little, they didn’t have strict genre rules if they weren’t pretentious fucks who wanted to make a statement. Ren would much rather listen to music he actually liked. Right of the moment when Hux had asked, during study time, he had just happened to have felt like listening to an old album by Dream Theatre, called Awake, released 1994, with a bit of obvious 90’s music traces in the sound of it. Like anyone presenting something they like, or an insight to what they listen to, he was a little tempted to change it to something he would assume that Hux would enjoy more, but at the same time, that was starting to get a little damned pretentious, he’d get into an actual conversation about it, the day Hux would care about it for any other reason than insulting it.

All in all, it wasn’t so bad. A more grown up mess of a twat, an asshole of a stuck up shithead who simply wasn’t that bad to be around, not all in all. Yet, he couldn’t just let go of the feeling that Hux was avoiding him, or holding some sort of unnamed grudge, and it was getting kind of fucking annoying now and then, yet, Ren knew better than to forcefully pry when it came to things that really weren’t his concern, most of the time, at least; he would not see his efforts go to waste, again.

  


[Hux]

Time passed and as every pretentious mentor in every story liked to tell their not very agreeing apprentices, ‘time heals all wounds.’ The time with Mike still made him feel sick, the mere memory was too much to think of, but together with the distraction of the menace Ren, the days slowly became manageable again. Hux still felt like he looked like Hell, and would still wearing a bit of makeup to school to hide it, but he had reached the part where he could sleep rather okay. He had come to the conclusion that it had all been his fault in the first place, for having wanted something like that.. Now he was fighting with the knowledge of what he had done and how ashamed he was for wanting and then backing out of it, needing to be saved by someone else. Hux was more than used to Phasma standing up for and getting him out of trouble, but to have someone he didn’t know save him and see him in such a position was beyond mortifying.

Sometimes, it was too hard to look at Ren. The memories became too strong, and it was all the more easier to not have the killer whale in his face. Other times, he found that he didn’t mind that much to be protected by another big bear. He especially liked it when Ren would just barge in and nearly knock out people that were bothering him.

There were, of course, a bunch of things that made Hux really dislike Ren. Excluding the fact that he was a druggie, a brute, and someone whose face was generally asking to be disliked, he was also talking like a borderline savage sometimes, listened to music that had perfected the art of replacing talent with screaming. Above all listed crimes was the newly discovered war against Hux’s appearance. In other words: the fact that he was ruffling his hair on the most unexpected of times. He also refused to get a clue, and to leave him alone.

He should hate it. He did, yet he did not.

The days became a little more entertaining with him around. He also began to notice a few things about him that Hux imagined no one else had noticed. At first, he hadn’t really believed it when he began to notice that Ren didn’t do anything unless he was provoked. Spending more time around him, the ginger saw him fight a few times, but Ren never raised his fist without someone pushing him too far. Worst of all was that new girl. Hux wasn’t about to do anything about her, it was a lot more fun to just watch them dance around each other like two wolves over a piece of meat, but he could see that she was pushing the killer whale a lot more than most other would. A strange, unwelcome part of him had started to dislike her more because of the way Ren became when he was around or saw her. He sort of… forgot most of the things around himself and like a dog, borderline growled. The ginger could not make sense of why he felt like he did though.

Of all the things one did not expect about Ren the most surprising was just how good of a study partner he was. Hux was very, very strict towards himself when it came to his studies. He was only satisfied by the highest grades and it had long since been a giant pest to him that the delinquent had better grades than he did. He was not about to admit it, but Ren was brilliant in school. He was lucky to have been born with such an outstanding mind, not everyone was that lucky.

One day when they were studying, as had become a thing they tended to do together during the times when their newly created peace treaty was in effect and they stopped verbally assaulting one another for amusement, Hux finally asked what Ren was listening to in his headphones. The song that played in his ears as he got the big things placed on his head was so far from what he was expecting that he temporary forgot that he A) hated to be touched and B) that he hated having his hair messed up. For a few second, he looked up at Ren with surprise in his eyes but when he saw the man’s smug face, he accidentally pushed his face away with his hand. “Oh please. Don’t look so satisfied.”

\---

One day when he got home, he realized that he had gotten a text from a number he didn’t recognize. He was about to delete it when he noticed the first words of the text. “Your knight is a whor-” Hux also noticed that there was a video attached. Despite better judgement, he slowly pressed the button for open and started the video.

It was filmed at a party with some music blasting in the background. Hux saw a number of people he didn’t recognize but they all blurred out when he realized what exactly was being filmed. A man had been pushed over the livingroom table, on his back and was taken. It didn’t look staged which meant that this was most likely someone that had just filmed something that happened at a party. It was leaving a very disgusting feeling in his gut and his mouth. He would not have been able to handle someone filming when he had sex, least of all like this. Then the man on the video turned his face a little to the side, revealing who he was. Somehow, it felt obvious as soon as he saw Ren’s face. Of course it was him, why else would anyone send him a video like this with Ren’s name in the message. Hux almost felt silly for not having realized it sooner or… maybe he did and was just denying it to himself. Worse yet, his classmate seemed so far out of it that he wasn’t at all realising what was going on.

A feeling of disgust and horror washed over him as he continued to watch. He couldn’t look away as the sex just continued. He heard a few remarks from the people in the room alongside someone giving a little chuckle. When it was done, he just stared at his phone until it turned dark.

The more time they had spend around each other, the more he had heard various nicknames that were aimed towards the overgrown teenager. One of the more common one had been whore. Suddenly, it made all the more sense as to why. A few weeks ago, this would have been amazing blackmail material, and something Hux would have bullied Ren for, but now it was hard to keep back the tears of hate and rage that threatened to break loose out of his control.

It took a very long time but when he had gathered himself, he knew exactly what he had to do. Not for Ren but for himself. Mostly for himself.

The next day at school, Hux didn’t look at Ren when they met by the lockers. He kept staring down the corridor until a certain person showed up. It seemed that in his desire to send him the video, the teenager had forgotten that his number could be tracked through the text. Hux walked towards the teenager whose number he had tracked. He managed to see some amused faces on his way towards his target but it didn’t distract him from his goal. Which was, simply, to hit the guy in the face, as hard as he could. Hux was weak but he happened to have a big phone, something that very much came in handy right now. When he was almost there, he pulled the phone out of his pocket and used it as a club to whack the teenager over the face as hard as his thin body would allow. It was sure to get him in trouble but for now, it was worth it just to see the look on all of their faces. “...I got your message.” The ginger hissed through clenched teeth.

  


[Ren]  
Another morning, another day in school, it really wasn’t more than that, at least not to Ren. He was a little tired, because against all better judgement, he had decided to watch a movie way past midnight, as he stayed over at a friend’s place, avoiding his family, as much on routine as ever. He had that sort of headache that was barely there, but gave him a hard time to focus on what he was doing, fucking great. Most of his days were slow and boring that way, and he was about to pester Hux a little before class, he had rather spontaneously gotten this idea in his head, and now after his last music victory, he wanted to know Hux’s opinion on Van Canto. In short, they were a group that mostly performed covers of other groups, in an almost all vocal version, they were an acapella rock band, that was pretty fucking unique; at least, he wondered if the ginger would appreciate the technical brilliance behind their music. 

Although, Ren never got that far, because the twat seemed to have just decided that this was one of those mornings where he was too good to interact like a decent human being; Hux seemed to be firmly ignoring him. Well fuck it, then. Today was less of a good day, and one of those days where the headache made it hard to control the aggression and sense of betrayal he felt when being ignored, like the prick was somehow above him-...   
  
Smack.   
  
That sound was all too familiar, but the sight, oh Hell no, that sight was so out of place that it left the tall teenager just gaping in chock. He watched as the guy, who had just been smacked over the cheek with a larger Iphone, cowered together in pain, tears in his eyes, but most of all, complete and utter disbelief was written all over his face, and really, who wouldn’t be in disbelief.   
  
Hux just… hit someone? He just hit someone hard, using the extra weight and density of his phone to make sure that it hurt, leading to Ren, in a daze of surprise, somehow gathering that the redhead definitely planned that punch ahead.

It wasn’t at all a graceful hit, which was to no surprise really, for someone who didn’t practice violence on regular basis, and who wasn’t particularly strong. It was pretty fucking unbelievable, and well, pretty much all the onlookers, classmates and schoolmates alike, seemed to think just that. The kid that the ginger had messed up was obviously in a lot of pain, and screaming out something half-coherent about Hux being insane, and something about gay and eh, okay fine, he didn’t fucking care and it didn’t make any sense, he would have to fucking question Hux. So… the rich kid had maybe just been too focused to really give Ren any attention. What was this, some well planned scheme of vengeance against a bully? He really fucking needed to take the ginger aside and ask him, if he pulled the kid aside, then at least they could probably manage until the first period before Hux would get into any further trouble for what he just did, it was after all routine, Ren knew how these things worked. He didn’t waste much time at that. Hux had caused a nosebleed on the kid, it seemed, and the kid was far too busy with that to stay in spot and be angry at the ginger.   
  
Hence, Ren shut his locker and quickly made his way over to Hux, grabbing him by the sleeve and pulling him aside. He was about to drag him outside, but obviously wasn’t the only one who wanted his attention. The rich bitch of a sister looked like a confused dog, to be honest, like she truly couldn’t comprehend what had just happened, but then again, Ren didn’t blame her for being in even more disbelief over Hux physically hurting someone. Great, she followed them outside, fucking wonderful. Hadn’t the guy Hux punched run of to the bathrooms to stop the bleeding, Ren would have considered dragging his classmate there, just to make sure Phasma couldn’t follow.   
  
He’d just fucking have to ignore her and ask.   
  
“What the Hell was that about?” The proclaimed menace didn’t sound like he was accusing Hux at all, more like he was truly lost, and perhaps, just a little, impressed. If this really was getting back at a bully, Ren would almost feel a little illogical ounce of pride inside of him, that Hux had finally managed to stand his ground, for himself.

Of course, little did he know that it wasn’t exactly for himself that Hux had punched the guy, which may have been a good thing, he probably would have had an even harder time comprehending that, without any warning. 

 

  
  
[Hux]   
His heart was beating harder than after one of the torturous P.E days. He had never punched someone before, the adrenaline that pumped through his veins made him feel far too overstimulated to notice much about the surroundings. He could tell that the teenager was yelling at him but the words made no sense. He had the urge to kick him again but knew better than to do it. Instead, he just stared down as his victim ran away from him and towards the toilet, leaving a trail of blood after himself.

Hux barely noticed that he was pulled away, instead he just followed with his fist balled around his phone. It wasn’t until he was outside in the colder air that he managed to snap back and look up at Ren and his sister. He blinked slowly before looking down at his fist and then up again.

“...Hah. I… somehow can’t believe I got all the way there to hit him.” The voice was filled with disbelief to the point where he almost sounded like he was between crying and laughing. No, actually, some tears had begun to roll down his cheeks but he quickly just wiped them away with the back of his hand, laughing again. “I can’t believe how you guys just… Punch people… Like that, you know what I mean.” The tears kept on rolling down his cheeks but the ginger couldn’t tell why. He was now shaking as well, his legs barely able to keep him up. He sniffed and stuffed the phone back in his pocket so he could focus on rubbing his tears away.

“Oh God, I can’t believe I punched him… Hahaha… Did you guys see his face? He looked completely beyond disbelief… I… Kind of need to sit… down…” The last words were mumbled before he half stumbled over to the closest bench and sat down, hiding his face in his hands still. This did not stop his shaking. “F-fighting really… isn’t my thing.”

  


[Ren]  
The fuck…   
  
The ginger brat didn’t make any damned sense whatsoever, but then again, maybe that was to be expected. Ren just sighed, and let Hux move over to sit down; the nerd seemed to be nearly as shaken as that day when he had been saved by his taller classmate, a few weeks ago. Fine, he’d let the other calm down.   
  
Disbelief still washed over him, made it feel like it creeped over his skin, but to some degree, his mind seemed to have made sense of it all by thinking that Hux had indeed gotten revenge against one of his bullies, which made it a lot easier to focus on his classmate, rather than the events that had unfolded just earlier. It made it easier to focus on the fact that the ginger had to fucking calm down. Hence, he crouched down in front of said ginger, in a comfortable enough position, patiently waiting for him to calm down a little, but then reached out to ruffle his hair again. The little Ren had gathered, Hux didn’t very much like being touched, which the taller of the two often ignored, but not when the other was like this, then Ren would want to let Hux come to him, rather than touch him too much, like, more than touching his hair once.   
  
“You got him pretty fucking good,” he started, a somewhat wicked smile, while still remotely gentle, spread over his lips. “What the Hell did the fucker do to deserve that one coming?” Comfortably calm was surprisingly easy to remain, mostly because he had no reason to be emotionally invested or aggressive about it all; when one thought about it, it was pretty fucking funny of a situation, that shocked most people, at least for an outsider.   
  
Phasma was… in disbelief, very much like everyone else. However, Ren failed to see her standing behind them, looking uncomfortably lost.

Her brother wasn’t at all the type to show emotions, and while he was meek, visibly weak and someone that she always felt need to protect, they never talked, not about emotions. Well, Phasma herself wasn’t exactly the one to show any emotions; any child of Brendol Hux would have learnt to swallow that down and try not to show any weakness. Hence, her brother usually didn’t cry in front of her, not very often, and every time she had seen him in pain and suffering, she had just stood there awkwardly, or left the room, not able to cope with having no idea how to act around him when he was hurt. They weren’t supposed to show emotions and weakness that way, which left her standing there awkwardly and out of place, eyes averting away from her own brother, not saying a word.   
  
When she looked up, she found that the shock which hadn’t even settled had been nothing compared to the unbelievable sight ahead of her. Ben Solo, commonly known as Ren, was crouching in front of her brother, and calmly talking to him, acting like someone who actually knew how to comfort someone. She never noticed her hands curl up into fists, and she averted her eyes again, shifting her weight to the other foot, feeling restless and uncomfortable. Since when was Ren someone to look out for others? What the Hell happened between them when she was gone. She really had nothing to say, and it gave this bad feeling in her mouth, and made her want to not be there, it made her feel useless.   


 

  
[Hux]  
This was wrong; showing emotions to someone was wrong; he should know better. He had been going over his punch for half the night and all morning, he knew what to do and he had done it but now, when it was all over, it was beyond hard to figure out what he was feeling. As he sat down, he had managed to gather himself enough for his emotions to no longer make him cry, even if the trembling was continuing.

Ren’s hand ruffled his hair, causing him to give a disapproving noise, and swat a little after said hand. As he did, he found himself looking down at the overgrown teenager, who was kneeling in front of him. He did not have enough self control to stop his face from blooming out into red. Hux huffed and straightened up, trying to push his hair back into place as he leaned back. He crossed both his legs and arms, trying to present himself in a much more secure manner, but it only served to make him look somewhat insecure. At least, he had reached ‘stick up the ass’-insecure again, instead of broken wreck, definitely an upgrade.

The face in front of him was kind and gentle. It was hard to look directly at him and even harder to look away. The question that left the other’s lips, however, made his chest heat up with the same anger that had resulted in that guy’s nosebleed. He closed his eyes and pinched the bridge of his own nose, at least making an attempt to not let his feelings get the better of him again.

“...He…” He hadn’t even thought about trying to explain this, least of all explain it to the person whose honor he was defending, when he had attacked the filth who had sent him the video. “You… Actually, this is all your bloody fault!” Oh, it was so much easier to aim his anger towards Ren, almost familiar in a sense. A welcomed normal, in this day of extremely abnormal happenings. “How could you be so… so… reckless!? That shithead sent me a video, it was… you… And I… Well, you were obviously drunk or high off your stupid ass and you should know bloody better than to just… let that happen in such a crowd. Bloody Hell, Ren are… are you okay? Did you go to the police for that? I swear, if I ever… see that bloody monster who would… Actually, I will phone-punch them all. Oh really, I will! God… I think I never once was this… this… Damnit…!” His little speech soon turned into rambles and before he knew it, he was back to having tears in his eyes as he glared down upon the killer whale in a T-shirt. “People like that don’t deserve you…” He couldn’t tell what that last thing was supposed to mean. He more or less just ended up mumbling it into his hands and directly hoped that Ren hadn’t heard it.

  


[Ren]  
Fuck.

It dawned on him very fast, exactly what his classmate was talking about.   
  
Shit, fucking Hell, no, he did not want to talk about this; Ren had been so sure that he was done with his damned explanations to people.   
  
At least, Hux definitely managed to take him off guard, the black haired teenager’s lips were slightly parted, as if he was about to speak, but couldn’t get the words off his tongue. He was completely fucking taken off guard.   
  
This was a long story. Fuck, how long had it been even, three months or so…? His lips formed into a strained straight line, and actually, he averted his eyes, tables turned for once, as he felt the stare of his classmate burning into him, rather than the opposite. Ren hadn’t actually expected that people that mattered would still see it, or well, perhaps that was foolish, perhaps he knew better, but just didn’t want to fucking think about it, wish thinking, perhaps. Some people had asked him about that goddamned video, out of concern and worry, and he had to explain himself then, mostly people just teased him for it. Hell, even Phasma had mocked him for acting like such a lowlife whore.   
  
Well, perhaps, this was the actual reason that Ren did not carry his mother’s family name. Organa was a fairly unique name, and if he could ever be traced back to being her son, things like these would likely be much of a public embarrassment for the famous politician. Leia Organa wouldn’t admit that she was ashamed of him, at least not to his face, but Ren himself had felt like this was why it was good that their connections could, in fact, not be traced very easily. It helped that he looked a lot more like his father than mother, and that he was so ridiculously tall, and his dyed black hair helped too. Luckily, his family had no idea about that video, and he had lived in fear, for months, that they would actually find out, until he finally managed to somewhat half-assedly convince himself that he didn’t care.   
  
It had been a mess, that sort of thing that one can’t really fathom the gravity of until one had actually experienced it. It was that sort of thing a guy like him never thought he’d experience, the thing mostly only girls feared, and therefore were a lot more careful out in public and at public parties.   
  
He had been drunk, and possibly quite high, and it was a house party of mostly older strangers. He didn’t remember much more than that. There had been some particularly bad things going on at home, and he really just wanted to get away, and it had worked for a while. Only, when he came to, it was impossible to figure out how many people had been inside of him, and it wasn’t until someone he knew showed him the video that had been going around, that he even realised what was going on. It was still impossible how many people had been involved, but at least some douche whose face wasn’t really visible in the video, making it all the harder for him to figure out who it had been, had decided to push him down on his back over the living room table, pulling his trousers down just like that, and decided to fuck him, in the midst of all people, something that Ren would never once had agreed to, had he been able to tell the ceiling from the floor, or remember anything at all.   
  
He told himself that he wasn’t ashamed, that it didn’t matter, but the feeling of discomfort burned inside of him, in shape of shame, among unnamed other emotions, and when someone treated it like this, it was even harder. It was one thing when strangers shouted whore after him in the corridors, at least those fuckers he could use as punching bags, but when someone like his newfound friend questioned it like this, it would mean that he had to face the action and its consequences. He didn’t find the words.   
  
The first thing Ren had done, after all that, was to get himself testet, to make sure that he hadn’t gotten any damned diseases, and that alone had been stressful beyond belief, until the results came back, showing that he had gotten away just fine, for that time.   
  
He blamed himself, he had blamed himself ever since he had gotten to see what had happened, to just let himself get lost like that, and end up in such a fucking bizarre situation. It really was unreal and so distant, until one had experienced such a thing themselves, unbelievable even.   
  
There was a long silence, and honestly, Hux’s words nearly zoned out. The overgrown teenager still avoided eye contact, firmly, and bit his lower lip in frustration, before he stood up again. “We are going to be late for class,” he pointed out, definitely not running away. Act like you don’t care, fucking Hell, just try not to seem bothered; that of course, was a lot harder in practice than in theory. He pushed his hands into the pockets of the hoodie he was wearing, about to walk away, yet it didn’t feel fucking right to-... fuck, fine. Fucking Hell.   
  
“... We’ll talk later.”   
  
And just like that, the famous menace was off, pulling his headphones up to cover his ears, resorting to power metal, when Don’t Say a Word by Sonata Arctica started playing, hoping he could focus enough for class, and that the music could drain him of a bit of emotion.   
  
The day passed, but Ren didn’t get away from Hux, and to his great surprise, the young man got a hold of his number somehow, meaning that finally, Ren agreed to meet with the other in the nearby park. Ren didn’t have any dogs to walk, that particular day, but the fresh air felt wonderful against his face. He was awaiting the other, pulling the black and white scarf, with a plaid pattern, closer up over his chin, before burying his hands in the pockets of his hoodie again. It wasn’t that cold just yet… he was just fucking uncomfortable with whatever encounter this would be. Hell, the ginger brat had gotten as far as to get his number just for this.   
  
When he finally spotted the ginger, it was hard not to averting his eyes. Well fuck, it seemed that now his mind allowed him to recall the words of the other crystal fucking clear. A very minor comfort was the amusing sight of Hux dragging his three dogs with him, obviously too invested in getting answers to let the pugs drag him about their usual way.   
  
“... What do you want to know?” Straight to the point, it was still hard to look at him, hence, Ren just looked away, in a somewhat nonchalant manner, trying to not look as uncomfortable as he felt, hands still in his pockets. It was probably better to just start over, it felt the most natural to start the conversation over, besides, it felt a lot better to talk to the twat and not his sister, Hell, Ren refused to explain himself in front of Phasma. Hux was… different, it was a manageable level of discomfort.   


 

  
[Hux]

Hux barely had time to realize that Ren was running away from him. The whole situation was so unreal to him, to find that the teenager before him was capable of showing other emotions than just anger and smug satisfaction. It must be all the more unreal to the one crouching before him, because Ren was avoiding his eyes. Had there ever been a time when the other was avoiding to look at him when they spoke? No. That answer was simple as that. There had been no such time before this.

In the silence that followed, Armitage Hux ended up thinking about his life, about what had gotten him to this point. A month ago, this would never have happened, he would not have risked his reputation and the wrath of his father for Benjamin Solo, of all people. The man was more than capable of taking care of himself, he wasn’t exactly a man whose honor needed defending, least of all by a weakling like himself. Yet, after that party, after the mistake he had made in allowing that guy Mike to pull him into the toilet, something had been different. Not only inside himself but between him and Ren. He preferred not to think of it, simply pretending that everything was fine and the same was a lot easier to do. Yet this was a situation that could never have happened unless he had know the horrible feeling of having someone inside of him that he no longer wanted there.

He shouldn’t care, it was just the druggie shithead that had gotten himself into a situation where he only had himself to blame. They didn’t know each other and they were definitely not friends, he just happened to know more about the guy than he had previously to all this. There was no logical reason for him to be this invested in the man and his foolish mistakes.

Ren stood up and broke his trail of thoughts. Was he actually running away? That was new. Pushing seemed like a bad idea, if Ren hadn’t added those last words, he might have just given up there and then. However, the sentence gave him the reassurance he needed. He would definitely keep on until he was satisfied.

It didn’t take very long for Hux to be called to the principal’s office. He told himself that he was going to be fine, after all, Ren had been called there three times the past month and he still had his head attached to his shoulders. He had never spoken to the principal alone and in all honestly, the man freaked him out. Even from afar, it felt like the man could see right through him. He took a deep breath and entered the office, sitting down in the chair before the desk and hoped to a higher power that he didn’t believe in for this to not be as hard as he imagined it to be.

The talk was surprisingly easy. After they got over the heavy detail that this was something very much unexpected of the male Hux sibling, and that his father was going to have to be contacted. This was followed by the question of why he had attacked another student. Hux had turned this question over and over in his head, finally reaching the conclusion that this was perhaps one of the few situations were truth was in order, or at least some truth.

His sentence became a lot lighter as he did. Hux told the principal that the student in question was spreading around a video of a person in the school being raped. He explained how he had gotten it late the other day and after watching it, he had searched for the number on one of those search sites. When he had realized who it was, he had gotten so angry that he had been unable to think straight. The hit was, he admitted, planned. When asked if he regretted it, he had of course lied and said that he did, but he could tell that the principal could see right through him on that point. They talked for a bit more, before he was sent home for the day, being told that his father would be contacted later that day. He had been asked to show the video to the man for proof, but he had refused to, saying he deleted it. It didn’t feel right to show Ren like that to anyone.

Well back home, Hux had messaged his sister, pestering her until she got him Ren’s number. In return for the favor, he agreed to walk the three bean-buddies for the whole week, effective immediately. Like so, he contacted the overgrown teenager and arranged a meeting.

When he arrived to the meeting that evening, he was indeed pulling the ducktales trio along with him. They were as unruly as ever, but when they saw their new best friend, and

proclaimed leader of the pack, they all ran over to greet him. Ren, however, ignored them and spoke to Hux instead. The ginger noticed that he was out of breath before speaking, and had to take a moment to breathe before he could answer.

“This is not any kind of interrogation, Ren.” He ended up sounding a lot more annoyed than he was expecting, and quickly moved to brush some of his own hair out of his face, to try and hide the fact that he was annoyed with himself. “I guess I was simply just… wanting to know if…” He stopped, one of his hands moving a little closer to his own wrist as he too avoided to look at the teenager in front of him. “If you are okay. Are you okay?”

  


[Ren]

This was really fucking awkward. Since when was Hux actually entitled to care this much about his classmate? Fine, according to Ren, even if the ginger wouldn’t agree, they were most definitely friends, and that was reason enough; it was just that the twat wasn’t the type of fucker to treat others in any other way than being an asshole towards them. The overgrown teenager would never have brought Hux along to that café or to meet his outside friends if they weren’t actually friends, and to the twat’s credit, that was better than pretty much anyone else they knew in school. Sometimes, it was rather nice to be that one person who had something others wanted to get, to be the person who could introduce people to older chicks, or get them into a party, despite being under age, because he knew the people; some people were simply lucky that way. At the same time, being that person always came with being unlucky, because it meant that people didn’t bother with or actually wanted to know him, not really; even when they assumed themselves to be his friend, it was only ever really if it was beneficial to them.   
  
He really did not want to admit to himself that it might feel good to have someone worrying like this. However, that was, for a different reason than most people would probably assume. It wasn’t that he thought it impossible for people to care about him, or worry, it was just that sometimes it had no fucking credibility if people cared. Anyone would worry if they knew the person in question, making it harder to zone out their humanity, but further, anyone grown up or decent would worry as well, even if they didn’t quite know the person very well, because they had some sort of fucking sympathy for people around them, which was too much to ask for all the teenagers who thought that video was hilarious.

Furthermore, it was hard to tell if it felt good that Hux had, in fact, punched the guy, or not. Part of Ren felt pretty fucking good about it, it was more than anyone else had done, but it wasn’t still something worth real credibility. So what if the ginger got so upset that he felt he served justice by punching the fucker; it was probably just because the anxious mess wouldn’t be able to handle his emotions any other way. In the end, by some logic, it was all for the kid’s own sake that he had decided upon having vengeance.   
  
Ren always considered all those things, he had to; he knew well that just because people cared for real, or had convinced themselves that they cared, it didn’t mean that they’d stick around, or actually do something that was worth anything, in the long run. He had learnt that the hard way; besides, he always managed to push people away, so it was hard to imagine that this would end any differently. It was so much easier to keep everyone at a distance from the start.   
  
The corner of his lips quirked up into a somewhat unamused and weak smile, and he still refused to look directly at his classmate, as Ren bent down to actually greet the excited dogs, all so happy to see him. Dogs were great that way, no going behind your back, no falseness or complications to the relationship.   
  
“You know that things is like, what, three months old or something? I’m fine; the fuckers will stop thinking it’s funny sooner or later.” Well, that was what he had kept on telling himself for the past three months. 

 

  
  
[Hux]

Armitage Hux was certain of a lot of things, among there were some extreme ideas, such as the notion that being homosexual was something one should be ashamed about, which was the reason that teenagers were wired to use ‘gay’ as an insult to hurt one another, and another being that he had no friends and never once had. Sure, he had people he could talk to and people he didn’t hate being around but other than Phasma, who could herself be very untrustworthy, he didn’t consider anyone his friend. It might seem like a borderline idiotic idea, but Ren had never once called them friends and so, he had no reason to believe that they were friends.

On the notion of Ren, Hux had during the day been wrestling with a simple yet for him unfamiliar notion, this being the realization that he cared enough about Ren to not want him to be put through something like what he had seen on that video. Why he cared was a mystery to the ginger, whereas anyone could have told him that it was because he somewhere, deep inside of him, had started to regard the overgrown teenager as a friend and a safety to be around. Hux figured it was because of the thing that had happened back at the café-turned-bar and how he himself still suffered from the aftermath. Nothing more.

It seemed to take an eternity before Ren crouched down and started to pet the triplets from Belleville, but it was a little relieving to have him do something. Anything. Hux looked down as they crammed for the attention of the hand, almost making a pug tower in their excitement to get some of that good petting action that the ginger tended to neglect.

The words that left the taller’s lips made him snort with annoyance and cross his arms over his chest, once again ending up in that rather homosexual-looking pose with his hip a little to the side. “Why no, I did not exactly look for a date on the video. I was far too busy being bloody terrified by what I saw. That would have been scarring for anyone, even more so a straight male, do you honestly believe that I would fall for such an obvious lie? I will have you know that I happen to be an expert when it comes to lies and that was admittedly worth a 7 out of 10 but it has to be at least a 9 for me to fall for it.” He ended up rambling a lot more than he had planned.

  


[Ren]  
He was fairly certain that he wasn’t blushing, and the pugs were pretty good of a distraction; he still avoided eye contact.   
  
Thinking about it all, maybe he simply agreed to meet with Hux because he wanted to see what this upper class prick would actually do. Ren definitely wasn’t hoping for real caring or understanding, but it was curious beyond belief to how someone like the twat would react to all this; it wasn’t like it made a big difference to the shame and pain, he buried that rather deep already.   
  
To distract his mind, he started counting differences between the three dogs, that did look rather similar, hoping to learn to recognize them, for some unclear fucking reason, but perhaps, if they were friends, he would see more of those pugs; besides, they fucking adored Ren, obviously, as they crammed together to get his attention, nearly tumbling each other over.   
  
The slight aftertaste of his own breath, smelling of a bit of smoke did fairly well in hiding the foul taste that came with the array of emotions he struggled to control. Well, he was managing so far, this seemed to work.   
  
Then, suddenly, Hux said something to take him completely off guard, and for the second time that day, the overgrown teenager looked up at him, from a crouched position, looking all but big and intimidating. Surprise was written over his face, and the words clearly caught his attention, but it was pretty much impossible to tell why for an onlooker. It could be the shame, and discomfort, simply that Hux stated something so harsh out loud, or simply because Hux had seen through his facade of being fine; one could imagine plenty of reasons just by the look. At least, he looked pretty fucking taken off guard. Reality, however, was a little different, because the words made Ren realise something, a little off topic. Sure, it wasn’t fucking great to have that arrogant brat tell him how he was supposed to feel about all this, but even more than that, it reminded the crouching man of something very awkward. He never really cleared up with Hux that he wasn’t straight. Well, fuck, wouldn’t this be fucking awkward…   
  
He wasn’t angry, at least. Perhaps, there would be a risk that he would lose his temper if Hux kept on telling him what to feel, because, to Ren, it clearly seemed like self satisfying responses; too much moral, too little actual care about the young man in front of the ginger.   
  
He chewed on his lower lip for a second, and rather quickly averted his eyes again, obviously losing his focus a little, as the hands petting the three pugs went limp for for a few seconds. He should probably distract himself before it all became too fucking heavy.   
  
“You, a good liar? You know that you’re a terrible fucking liar,” he pointed out, still not looking at said terrible liar, but at least there was faint smile on his lips for a mere few seconds, before it vanished again.   
  
“Listen, I-... Fuck, it’s okay, got it? You’re right, I was being fucking dumb and reckless; I can’t remember shit of that evening, anyway. It is my own fucking fault for being that deep fucking under, I get it.”   
  
“... Besides, I think I was kind of flirting with some of the guys there, a little earlier, it’s not like it was completely out of nowhere, even if I have no fucking recollection of agreeing to something like that… and I have no fucking clue who it was.” Let’s see if Hux could read between the lines, at all, this was a lot less awkward than telling him directly.

  
Perhaps it was one of the downsides of not talking to his parents about things, and simply watch his surroundings. No one ever really told Ren that he could count on anyone but himself, maybe just given his image of sheer brute force. Maybe it was simply the fact that people often had a hard time reasoning about things they had been through themselves; had it been someone else, it would have been obvious to him that it wasn’t their own fault. Had it been a girl, or someone weaker and smaller, he would never even consider it was their fault that someone else took advantage of them in a state of being completely defenseless and blacked out.   
  
As for himself, he really didn’t know how to fucking handle it, which was why he had ignored it, for most part, trying really hard to not fucking think about it. It felt so wrong to be defenseless, and taken advantage of, in a sense that his mind just kept on wanting to fucking deny it, badly.

  
  


[Hux]  
The three dogs noticed that the hand that was petting them went still, causing one of them who Hux’s knew as Dewey, since he was the one with a beauty mark right in the middle of his forehead, to steal the palm all for himself as he pushed his head into it.

Hux watched them crammer, as the other teenager pointed out that the ginger was an awful liar, something that made the redhead turn a bit redder in the face. He moved his arms a little closer to himself and let out a low snort. “Silence. I am an excellent liar.” At least that had caused Ren to smile a little, making the situation a little less tense.

Then he ruined it right away, and the tension was back. He briefly wondered if the pugs could actually feel any of their discomfort, or if they were too drugged by the prospect of big hand scratches. What Ren said was true, it was his own fault for getting that out of it. Logically, it should be. He should only have himself to blame, Hux did blame himself completely for what happened with Mike back at the bar, and so, of course the overgrown killer whale was responsible for his own body being exposed to such a thing.

Yet, that logic didn’t work. No matter how many times he went over it in his head, it simply didn’t work. All in all, the thought that it was Ren’s fault that he had been raped like that made the ginger feel sick to his stomach. It was, undeniably wrong. Maybe to a bloody psychopath or sociopath, that logic would be sound, but no matter how much Armitage Hux wanted to think of himself as emotionless, this proved a little too well to him that he wasn’t. Even if the big teenager had been flirting with them, it still meant th- wait a minute.

Hux blinked, forgetting exactly what he had been thinking and stared down at the lone wolf and his three piglets. “You… Flirting with them? But… you’re a man. And I have seen you with… you… You like women, don’t you, why would y…” It finally dawned on him. One could be attracted to more than one gender. His jaw dropped slightly before he quickly moved his hand over his mouth, his face turning a deep red.

“You bloody… T-shirt wearing menace!” He took a step closer and gave the man a kick on his hip. Not a hard one, he didn’t actually want to hurt him. “You tricked me. Okay, so you didn’t exactly… trick me but you…. Oh God, don’t give me that look…!” He threw the leashes on the black haired and stomped off towards the closest tree to gather his head. He needed some distance from the other man, and as the new guardian of the royal potato harvest, Ren was unable to escape off somewhere.  

  


[Ren]  
The thing which Hux had been the best at for the past weeks, when they had actually been friends, was distracting by simply being pretty fucking good quality entertainment.   
  
Ren couldn’t help but to be a little smug about it, which washed away the dread a little bit, and made it easier to not feel like he wanted to punch something, or someone, or maybe even himself. At least, the ginger wasn’t stupid enough to actually say that his classmate had tricked him, not in a convincing manner, obviously not able to trick himself that it would be the case; the truth was really simple; Hux had never asked him, and thus, Ren hadn’t told him.

At least, the proclaimed menace wasn’t stupid enough to think that the whole situation made a difference because he was a man, his head was just stuck about the fact that it was him. Had it been Hux who had been sexually assaulted, Ren would have probably killed the fucker, or so he told himself; it wasn’t in any way about a gender, it never was.   
  
He was rather quick with picking up the leashes to the little lumps, knowing well that they weren’t well enough trained to be trusted to remain in place without someone keeping them on a leash, a little like Hux then, hah. It was a bit of a sweet gesture, he supposed, to be trusted with someone’s dogs, really, because no matter what the twat would have to say about it, at least, they were his dogs, and he definitely cared about their well being.   
  
So far, Hux was kind of passing the test, in a sense, there wasn’t any visible fake pity, and while annoyed and emotional, he wasn’t making Ren answer for all that much either, as some seemed to feel fucking entitled to, when it was none of their goddamned business.

It seemed like they were lucky to not have all that many onlookers around them, in the park. Well, the weather wasn’t all that great, it was grey, and cold, but at least it wasn’t raining. Damned lucky then, that no one was staring at the dramatic and theatrical sight of the prissy brat, all so upset with Ren. If there had been onlookers, it would probably have looked like some shitty relationship drama, especially given that the taller of the two had the dogs trusted with him, and leashes thrown on him like that.

What a curious thought. It wasn’t like Hux was unattractive, it was rather the opposite actually; it had always been the prick’s personality that had been a good five turn offs at once. Now that they knew each other differently, at least a little tiny bit, even if it wasn’t all that much, it had become a lot more fun to cause reactions in the ginger, and it wasn’t bad to be around him. Maybe he should point out to the angry young man that it would look like they had a relationship drama going on, when he acted like he did, out in public, like this. That, if anything, would cause one Hell of a reaction, probably. Perhaps, it could even cause a strong enough reaction to make the kid forget all about that video for a little; Ren just wanted it all to be over and forgotten, refusing to think that it would leave any traces in him, even if it probably had.

Not really giving too much of a fuck, Ren sat down on the grass then, giving the pugs further chances to cling up to him and cuddle, trying to keep them from running after their owner, who obviously wanted to be left alone.   
  
It was a curious fucking thought, even more so than the last, to think that he had come to care about the prissy little brat. He could admit that, sure. He wasn’t a monster, and Hux had been through a lot of fucking unfair shit that he shouldn’t have been forced to endure. If one stopped and didn’t see the ginger as a helpless little twink, and actually considered the fact that he was able to endure things, and able to act, much as he had shown earlier that day, then yeah, Ren wasn’t worrying too much that he’d be a bad influence on the other. If anyone told him differently, he’d probably say that Hux could handle it, because that was what Ren believed. Hell, the ginger could even handle the life Ren led outside school, most probably, even if it wasn’t the sort of thing the kid should be involved it; he still knew more than mostly everyone else in school, because while Ren talked about those things, he didn’t just bring classmates with him when he met with friends.   
  
Good, now he was distracted again, for a bit.   
  
“You done soon?” It didn’t actually sound as mocking as he thought it could have.   
“I don’t think I owe you an explanation for that shit, you didn’t ask, but I told you there’s nothing wrong with being gay, now stop throwing a tantrum, or onlookers might think we’re having a relationship twist going.” 

 

  
  
[Hux]   
He stomped off towards the closest tree and stopped there with his back to the collected disasters behind him, glaring into the bushes around him as he tried to remember how think properly. It suddenly seemed beyond hard, especially when his head was spinning with the new information.

Where to start… Ren had a point, of course he hadn’t been lying to him. It felt like he had but that wasn’t exactly true. Keeping information and lying weren’t the same, even if the result felt similar to the borderline shaking Hux. He lift his hand and moved it over his lips, staring out at nothing.

He now recalled more things about the night at the bar, about Ren himself. The way he had been staying close to him and the way they had almost touched a lot of times, no, wait, he had even been pulled into the man’s lap. Wait… did that mean that the black haired was, in some ways, attracted to him? The thought was too strange for him to dwell on, he decided to just wave it away, accidentally swatting with his hand in real life. He decided to focus on the talk he had back when he first told the man that he was gay. If Ren had maybe just said something… Hux groaned and hid his face in his gloved hands, shaking his head. “...Stupid… shithead… grhn…”

The teenager called out from behind him, causing Hux to turn and look at him. He hadn’t realized that he accidentally messed up his own hair. He slowly turned, stomped in place and then made his way back to the other. The three Stooges all turned as one and tackled his feet, as if they hadn’t seen him for five years. The redhead almost managed to ignore them, only swaying a little in place. “First, we don’t look anything like a relationship in a couple. No, I… you know what I mean. Stop smiling. Stop it, I said. Goddamnit, Ren.” He placed his hands over his face again, groaning loudly, as he did, he managed to mess up his hair further. “Goddamnit…”

For a few second, he stood there, hidden in the darkness of his hands. “Okay… Okay. I… I will pretend we did not have this little distraction. Returning to the earlier topic. I… I think it’s not especially… Good to do somethi- you know what, I am not good with putting things poetically or nice. Drinking and smoking, and all those idiotic things you do are beyond stupid and it was bound to end with you getting hurt. But nothing you did up to that point of… the video, makes it your fault. I read that online. I didn’t understand it until… you know.” He moved his arms down and around himself, avoiding the teenagers eyes. “However, I… I… know how it feels. I can’t… accept it, either…” He swallowed and put his hand in front of his mouth, feeling like he was about to throw up from having admitted that a similar thing had happened to him.

  


[Ren]  
Ren didn’t realise that he was smiling until Hux pointed it out. He was though, almost with a bit of glee to it, because the ginger was putting on one Hell of a show. Had someone told him that this prissy brat of all people would provide such quality entertainment, a month ago, he would probably not have believed them, but it really was true. It was in, sometimes clear, but mostly pretty damn subtle things, like how the ginger didn’t notice himself when he messed up his own hair, but if Ren did it, it was all barking and biting he received as a reaction, like a yapping little dog. On the note of couple, he couldn’t care fucking less what people around them thought, it wasn’t any of their goddamned business, which just made for more quality entertainment, when he knew that he could get to Hux like that, who would, in fact, care about what the surroundings thought about them.

He really did not feel the slightest bit bad about messing with the ginger like this. It made him feel powerful, but not in the same way a bully would, but rather, some sort of pride in being able to ruffle the feathers of the ginger, in being able to make the other act less like an emotionless twat, uninterested in the world around him, and more like a person who had, well, a fucking personality. It probably wasn’t exclusive to Hux, it had just been forever since Ren had a relation to someone he knew well enough to be able to poke and probe the right ways, someone he knew enough about, and had enough interest in, to actually know those things about. He hadn’t quite realised that he had missed that feeling. It came in bits, like how he had actually listened and remembered things Hux said about himself during that little evening out a few weeks ago, and how perhaps not all of which the ginger presented to strangers was entirely true, things he could confirm while talking to said ginger later on, for the past weeks; he hadn’t commented on any of the lies though, it mostly just left him with satisfaction to be the only one to know the truth, a little childishly so, not that he noticed.

At the words of the others, he bit back a laughter and held his hands up, showing that he wasn’t about to defend himself, still holding the leashes to the dogs in the left hand.  
  
“Throwing our dogs at me too, honey, I thought we had shared custody of them, how am I supposed to take care of them on my own?” The words followed up with a shiteating grin, although calling Hux ‘honey’ was probably the weirdest thing he had said in a while.   
  
The fun didn’t last very long, however, because Hux seemed he still wanted to talk about shit of which the taller of the two would rather want to just fucking forget. Fuck, fine.   
He sighed, letting his hands rest on the grass, leaning back a little, and looked up at the ginger, while he listened to him speak. This time around, seeing that the turmoil inside him had calmed, just a tiny bit, he at least managed to look at Hux while speaking. Ren looked incredibly unimpressed with the statements, hardly following what the Hell the twat was trying to tell him.

“I don’t need your fucking pit-... wha-... wait what the fuck did you just say? What the Hell do you mean you know what it feels like? Since when the fuck have you been through something like that? I don’t need you to fucking tell me you can imagine what it would be like;” Ren was borderline hissing by the end. This wasn’t some bullying-a-kid-for-being-gay thing, and he really had a hard time believing that Hux would have been in a situation like himself, which was the reason to the first reaction being that he believed the other was trying to give the all so classical ‘I can imagine and therefore I understand how you feel’ shit. His voice had definitely been raised, a bit, and he glared daggers at Hux, not quite fucking understanding what the twat was getting at this time.

 

  
  
[Hux]

Ah, there came the classic Benjamin Solo anger, the one that made everyone fear and avoid Ren, like they would avoid a rabid dog. It was not the least bit hard to see why he was making people around him nervous, least of all when the teenager was borderline growling at him. The ginger moved his arms closer to himself, unconsciously sinking a little deeper into his scarf to gain further protection from the other’s anger.  He never really imagined himself standing before the teenager, risking his wrath unprotected, while claiming that Ren was the victim to the situation that had happened to him. It made the ginger think a little further; how could it be his fault in his own case and not Ren’s fault when something like what happened in the video had happened?

Hux bit his own lip, he had been silent for a little longer now, something that was sure to only piss Ren off even more. The pugs had noticed that something was off now, they were walking in between them, looking at the two teenagers with their tennis ball eyes. One of them, he thought it was Huey, had decided to sit on the ginger’s foot in an attempt to console him from whatever pain he was holding back.

“No. I… I did not say imagine. I know what it feels like b...because it happened to me, t-too.” He was stuttering, he wished to all the gods that he didn’t believe in that he wasn’t, but he was. He felt so utterly small and disgusting, his very skin felt disgusting, and all he could do was swallow to try and bite back the tears that threatened to escape. He never wanted to cry in front of someone ever again and here he was, in front of the same person, almost crying like a girl. “I tho-thought I wanted it… I never thought I’d… have the chance. You don’t know what it’s like to actually… not be able to… have a chance to… Y-you have all the people in the world who wants you, not everyone is that bloody lucky…” He was crying now, his voice broken apart but pathetic sobs as he hid his face behind his hand. “But it was all so wrong… It hurt so much and it was so small and dark and I… I didn’t want it anymore… B-but he wouldn’t stop…” He stopped to breathe between his words before croaking out the last words. “Y-your… friend, the short… one… Helped… Made him stop. S-she promised not to t-tell you.”

The redhead was trembling now, he felt like he was about to fall together and so, he half sat, half fell down onto the path, not caring that his clothes were getting dirty. Now when he had said everything out loud, his hands had moved to his mouth as he tried to keep the sickness inside his stomach at bay. He didn’t dare to look at Ren but instead stared down at the pugs who all gathered around him, unsure of what had happened to make him come down to them.

  


[Ren]

On a scale of one to fury, Ren wasn’t all that angry, not at all, there were lots of more levels to spiral down into Hell; to himself, he really was just upset, the way he’d raise his voice. His feelings, which were bothering him, weren’t rage, per say, but rather a lot of other discomforts that were a lot harder to deal with, and much harder to put a finger on.   
  
In this level of anger, the teenager still expected answers, when he spoke up about shit, especially from Hux. Hence, what followed the two young men and the pug trio, was a long awkward silence, because the taller of the two teenagers wouldn’t lay down until he had won this goddamned ‘discussion,’ and for that to happen he needed Hux to admit defeat.

What came next, was the complete opposite of defeat. Far from Ren winning the discussion.   
  
What came next was fucking rage, at least a good high level of rage, borderlining upon fury.   
  
There was just one problem. Who the fuck was he supposed to direct the anger at?   
  
It took mere fucking seconds to realise what Hux was on about, of course, he wasn’t a fucking idiot. He knew exactly what day, what person and what circumstances this was about, just hearing about it. The detail about Joan answered both questions the black-haired teenager had, and questions he hadn’t been aware of that he had, and some that he really didn’t want the fucking answer to. Fuck. There far too many things to say for someone to comprehend all at once. He wanted to fucking punch Mike, hurt him bad for what he did, a rage boiled up within him that he didn’t quite understand, but it was strong, hateful and out for blood. The man had no fucking right to touch the minor that the ginger was, and a shithead like him was the last thing that the twat needed as a first experience. Hell, if that was the fucking case, Ren would much rather had done it himself just to get it fucking right-... What. Nevermind, now wasn’t the fucking time to even consider why the Hell he just thought of that.   
  
He was pretty fucking pissed at Joan for not telling him. Hell, they had spent the entire fucking evening together, those weeks back, and seen each other since then, and yet, she didn’t fucking tell him, but rather protected someone who was, to her, a stranger.   
  
He positively loathed himself for this. Where to fucking start, really. It was because of him that Hux had been there, during that evening, at all. It was because he didn’t look out for Hux that the idiot had gotten away with behaviour he shouldn’t have and wasn’t used to, in a crowd he knew little to nothing about and didn’t quite understand. Few things cut as deep as helplessness, and it made him feel pretty fucking helpless and guilty to realise first now what had been wrong all this time.

Then of course, he was furious with Hux for not having listened to him. Hell, all of that would never have fucking happened, if he had listened to Ren’s warnings about the fuckhead of a guy, who only seemed capable of thinking with his dick. If the ginger had just fucking listened to his classmate, he wouldn’t be hurt like this, and he wouldn’t be crying like a mess, and Ren wouldn’t have to feel guilty, and Joan wouldn’t have had to lie. It made Ren fucking pissed that the prissy brat showed him no respect, and just like Ren’s family and people around him, never listened to the young man, ever.   
  
“You fucking idiot, I told you to not fucking go near him! I can’t fucking believe that you would-... ugh, fucking forget it. I get it, you don’t need to fucking listen to me and you’re just doing this fucking pity train for me because you fucked up and got hurt. Great. Fuck off.“   
  
The leashes to the dogs were thrown back right at the ginger, and before anyone really had time to react, Ren was walking away, angry as fuck. He just wanted to turn away from shit he couldn’t deal with, he couldn’t fucking deal with this all.   
  
There was no time to consider what Hux said about it not being Ren’s fault, even though he was right, to some extent, of fucking course. Even if it wasn’t Hux’s fault that someone else had decided to force themselves on him, even if it never was the victim’s fault that someone decided to act against them, it was still all too fucking much for Ren to handle right now, it felt like he was shaking out of upset and anger, like it couldn’t be contained, and that he should, as per fucking usual, turn his back to the world, until it calmed down again.   
  
Already as he was leaving, he was starting to feel a deep dark pit grow in his stomach, a dread that he didn’t want to feel, he didn’t want to think of how hurt Hux must be, and that shouting at the ginger like that might have some really harsh consequences. Fuck, it was all wrong. It wasn’t what he wanted to do. He didn’t want to leave the other. He just, didn’t fucking know any other way to contain himself.

  


[Hux]

The things the taller teenager had just yelled cut deeper than the whole ordeal back at the café turned bar. They made the ginger feel even more disgusted and hateful towards himself, but the instant the other said those words, Hux knew them to be true. All ideas about it not being his fault were washed away, all ideas about it being rape disappeared too. It was all his own fault and he couldn’t even blame Mike for it anymore. Ren was right, he should have listened. This was all on him and the anger towards the video with the black haired was merely an illusion about similarities.

The leashes hit him hard enough to flinch, causing all the dogs to confusedly move around. Ren stomped off and Hux found himself alone on the cold ground with the pugs surrounding him.

_Fuck off._

When the bloody Hell had he started to enjoy the company of that horrible excuse of a person? When had it become nice to see the other’s face and to hear him talk? When had they reached a point where Benjamin Solo meant something to him and why in the world hadn’t he realized it sooner? It was too late now, he had chased away the closest thing he ever had to a friend.

_Fuck off._

The dogs moved around him as he shifted, one of them laying down on his leg as the other continued to wander around him with confused huffs and grunts. He didn’t have the energy to reach for the leashes but somehow found that his fingers had circled their way to them, holding them tightly.

“...You’re all pretty stupid, aren’t you…?” Hux mumbled and slowly started to pet one of them on the head, causing it to sit down too. “I guess I am too. I am talking to you as if you can understand me. Hah. People will think I’m insane…”

_Fuck off._

“Did you guys know that I’m an awful person? I think everyone else are stupid too, not just you guys. Phasma is an idiot too. Ren is a fucking idiot as well. I really don’t like people at all. I’m always looking down at them, all of them.”

_Fuck off._

“So… it’s really just good, you know? Now I don’t have to pretend to care anymore. Now I’ll finally be alone again. No Ren to bother me, those guys will probably leave me alone too. Now I can focus on… on… I’ll think of something. Phasma will be happy again, she won’t have to be bothered by him anymore.”

_Fuck off._

He curled together to a ball, pulling his legs up and shattering his pugs everywhere as they tried to avoid the moving titan. “I didn’t want anyone to stay with me either way. I much prefer being alone.”


	7. Dear Diary: aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "This was without a doubt, one of the strangest things to have happened to Armitage Hux. He was standing in the house of one of his father's enemies, having a conversation with Leia ‘don’t-make-me-mad-darling’ Organa about a mailbox, as Benjamin Solo was attempting to cast a spell, which components consisted of black hatred and red rage, at the couch potato that was his apparent father, all this while the ducktales trio had cornered the mutated experiment dog-bear, and were now busying themselves with trying to lick their way to the creature’s face. Hux was smiling, mostly because he had little to no idea what else he he could possibly do in this bizarre situation."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Actual chapter summary:

[Ren]  
This was all wrong, all fucking wrong, and he knew he was doing the wrong thing, and he would regret it and swallow it like every other thing he regretted. This however, this he wouldn’t be able to convince himself that he didn’t care about or regret in the long run. He didn’t know why, it just stung fucking deep. 

Maybe it was the empathy for the other, and the fact that he had come to caring, the fact that he liked the prissy brat, with all the bad attitude and bad personality included, Hell, part of the reason of what made the other attractive-... uh, decent to be around, was the fact that Hux wasn’t that much better than Ren himself, which was very much a comfort. 

Why was he doing this again? It was hard to tell. It just felt like people around him always disappointed him, rather than the opposite, just the way Hux had gotten himself into trouble in a way that Ren would feel guilty about for a long time to come. Just the way his uncle had retaliated against him before he had done shit in his life, simply because the man was convinced that he would go down the same fucking road as his grandfather and become a criminal, and possibly get himself killed. Just the way his father probably didn’t even want a child to begin with, or so he came off as, given how many times he had almost left the family. It was so much better if he just stayed the fuck away from people that weren’t like him, and didn’t know how to keep a respectable fucking distance. Ren usually never even got to the point of making the mistakes, before people were disappointing him, he had just fucking stopped trying. 

So why was it that he stopped in his tracks, a bit away? The sight of the ginger crying, the very first time, when Ren had saved him near their lockers, came back to him. Fucking Hell, he knew that Hux was a mess and that no one, to Ren’s own knowledge, had gotten close enough to do shit about it. However, it didn’t answer the question why he had turned around to gaze behind himself, feeling ridiculous relief over the fact that Hux hadn’t gone anywhere, and hadn’t left the spot on the ground. 

Was it really okay to just-... well fuck, he really should just leave, if anything, maybe take care of this mess another day, when he himself wasn’t upset enough to feel on the verge of tears. How the fuck had the ginger brat managed to draw something like that out of him? Only fights with his mother made him nearly cry, making the idea of talking to her all the harder, because of the effect she had on him. 

This was all a mess. It had spiraled into one so quickly; it seemed the both of them had a talent for making that happen. 

It wasn’t until pugs were bumping, rather than brushing, against his legs clumsily again, that he realised that he had, walked, well, nearly fucking jogged, back to the ginger. 

It really surprised him as much as anyone else. Even more so to kneel down on the ground and pull the redhead into a hug, effectively hiding the other’s face against his chest, while burying his nose in the hair on top of the other’s head, in the process messing up the hair even more… heh. 

He held the ginger, refusing to let go, and after a while, realised that maybe, just maybe, he had been crying a little. Well fuck, Hux was fucking right and Ren had to admit fucking defeat; when compared to the other, there was no way the taller of the two could say that the things which had happened to him were in fact his fault; it wasn’t Hux’s fault that similar circumstances happened; it wasn’t his fault that people had treated him like shit and betrayed him again, this time strangers. 

He probably hadn’t dared letting himself fucking care since he was… thirteen? Fourteen? It was hard to tell, it was that one time his uncle made clear what a fucking monster he expected his nephew to be, without said child having done anything that wrong. 

Crying almost felt alien, but it felt surprisingly good, even more so to just hold the other and refuse to let go. He… had no words really, not yet, he needed to fucking calm down, and Hux needed to calm down and he needed to let the fact that Hux mattered sink in. 

He would probably come to regret this. 

 

[Hux]  
Whatever in the world had just happened? Hux hadn’t even managed to figure out what to do with himself before footsteps stopped just by him. Before he had the chance to raise his head and look at whoever it was, he was grabbed. Panic washed over him, he had no idea who this was and what his intentions were when touching him. Then his face was pressed against soft fabric and a scent that he had gotten a lot more familiar with during the past month filled his nose. He almost forgot to breathe for a while before he was sobbing again, his arms lacing around the teenager and, he allowed all the walls to fall. Oh he was already regretting it… But it felt incredibly relieving to being comforted while crying, that really was something new to the ginger. 

None of them probably knew how long it took until they both gathered themself, Hux himself was beyond surprised when he realized that he was still holding on to the leashes. The dogs had found that they were not going anywhere and had thus ended up laying down in a pile. Hux face was red and his hair had been ruffled beyond recognition. He truly didn’t look like himself like this, the only thing that could connect the teenager to his name was his gloves. He breathed deeply, looking up at the other before rubbing his eyes and avoiding looking at him again. 

“...I don’t… Know why you came back. I… I didn’t need to b-” He stopped himself. “F-fine… I guess I needed that. A, a lot.” Hux breathed deeper, reaching up and vainly tried to fix his hair, Ren hadn’t let go of him, making the whole action quite hard. He didn’t know what to say or do from that point, ending up looking down at the pugs instead of facing Ren. He started to play with his sleeves, more or less squirming under the other’s eyes. 

After a little longer of not knowing what to do, he spoke up again. “...Y-you are right, I should have listened. You were right. I… I don’t know what else to say. I am so-, sorry.” He swallowed and moved to hide his face against the other’s shoulder again, becoming closely acquainted with the scarf that the teenager had around his neck once more. 

 

[Ren]  
It wasn’t as evident that Ren had cried, more than his face being somewhat wet and his eyes being redder than usual. 

He had no idea what he was doing, but he felt lightheaded, as a comfortable high perhaps, it felt good, and he found that he was smiling, just a little. It wasn’t necessarily because shit had been solved, or gotten any better, it was just that the energy would burn out completely sooner or later, when one was burning through strong emotions. He probably was smiling, because this was such an unlikely fucking scenario, and Hux made him feel good and it felt really fucking good to have calmed the other down, evidently calmed him down. 

Fine, it made Ren feel damned good about himself. Hux, different from most others, was rewarding in a different sense to actually interact with, in a way he didn’t expect. Having the other relax into his arms, was a beautiful sense of achievement, and it felt like it fucking meant something, given how neurotic and distant the young man was around just anyone else.

What was next was that Hux was positively fucking adorable when he looked like such an awful mess. He sighed, leaning forward enough for their foreheads to bump against each other lightly for a second, only for a moment though, because right about then he figured that it was a little fucking too intimate and that was actually awkward. 

Right, so uh, speaking came next. There was something rather new with this scenario, normally, when he had to admit that he was wrong, he just got more shit out of it, and no one actually acknowledged it, this once, it might actually matter.

“You should have,” he started off, following up with a deep sigh, gathering up his courage a little, and he reached out to ruffle the ginger’s hair. “It’s not your fault though, it’s none of your fucking fault that he can’t keep it in his pants, and that he chose to act like an asshole and wouldn’t fucking stop-....” Okay fuck, don’t get too upset again. He leaned in again, burying his nose against the ginger locks, feeling the soft hair against chin and lips. He closed his eyes, and tried to not fucking blow up about wanting to murder the bastard for what he had done. “He chose not to stop, anyone doing that is a fucking shithead, it’s not on you, and you didn’t do a thing wrong, even if you might have thought you wanted it, are we clear?” 

He drew back again, feeling a little embarrassed and ambivalent; he felt like the most natural thing was being close and comforting the other, but whenever he did, he felt awkward and like he was overstepping a boundary, it was damned hard to decide how to act. 

“... Are you busy tonight? I uh, I just thought that maybe, you could stay over. I don’t know about you, but this is a shitty fucking place to have these conversations and if people didn’t think so before, they definitely think we’re dating now.” 

He was probably serious. He had never imagined he would ask of just anyone to come home to his goddamned family and house, of all things. He was, however, fairly sure, that he could convince his mother to stay off his case and not bother with them, if he actually told her some truth, and maybe then it wouldn’t be that fucking bad. 

The idea had come as just a spontaneous impulse, really. He didn’t want to leave Hux alone right now, and didn’t want to dwell on why that was. 

 

[Hux]  
Maybe it would have been nicer if Ren had just stopped talking altogether. When he continued to speak about the older teenager, it only seemed to upset them both. Hux didn’t want to hear about Mike, he didn’t want to talk about it anymore. He was far too tired for it at this point but he made a small effort to nod a little, just to prove to Ren that he was actually listening still. 

It seemed like Ren made himself a tad too angry and so, he ended up burying his nose in Hux’s hair, causing the ginger to squirm a little in the other’s arms. He would have imagined it to feel uncomfortable or to in the least dislike to be touched like it. On the contrary to what he was expecting, he was actually enjoying, perhaps even enjoyed it a lot. 

Then Ren had pulled back, leaving a confused Hux to look up at him. What was it with the doing a thing and then pulling away out of nowhere? Wasn’t that just a tad rude? Hux huffed and rolled his eyes, not at all disappointed that the warm breath in his hair was gone. “Fine, oh, Supreme Leader. We are clear. Was there a reason you made that sound so demanding?” The last wasn’t as much of a question as it was a simple biteback. 

What Ren said next really did take him more off guard than anything the teenager had ever said before, Hux found himself just gaping at the other for two seconds before he regained his grip of reality. “You… just asked me to come to you home?” He gestured towards all of Ren at once. “I… feel like I should make a joke about you living in a trash can but I am so surprised I can’t figure out what to say…E-except that we do not look like we are dating at all! You are just imagining that.” 

It took him a little longer to realize that he never answered the teenager’s question and so, he glanced away, sinking a little deeper into his own scarf. “...F-fine. I’ll send a text to Phasma and tell her I’m staying at your place. Father isn’t home until Sunday so it will be fine. I, uh, guess I am bringing the three musketeers? Here, you hold the leashes so that I don’t have to fight against them.” He didn’t take no for an answer as he more or less pushed said leashes into the taller’s hand. 

 

[Ren]  
Right, so uh, he was actually doing this, he supposed…? The air around the tall teenager had changed a little, he didn’t notice himself, but he seemed a little more vulnerable perhaps, or at the very least, visibly lost. 

He didn’t even quite manage to focus on the insults Hux were throwing, or trying half-assedly to throw. Normally, he would have answered, or been a little smug about the obvious distortion between Hux’s idea of his household and reality, or perhaps just taunted him a bit with the fact that they most definitely looked like a couple when Hux was more or less cuddled up in his arms; any of that would have been bound to create some sort of rewarding reaction. 

Either way, instead, the teenager swallowed and handed the leashes right back to the ginger, while very much averting his eyes, “yeah whatever, just a second.” 

Ren had always been the type of person who needed a motivation to why he’d make an effort with something, and those things even applied to very small things, like texting his mother a long explanation of why his classmate would stay over in the middle of the week, bringing his three dogs with him, at that, or why someone would stay over at all, to be honest; Leia Organa would not go along with anything without a proper explanation. This whole situation was bizarre, he wasn’t naive enough to think that his mother wouldn’t get a thousand ideas, just because it was an irregularity for Ren to bring someone home, worse yet, he really had no idea what his dad was ever thinking, and hence, had no idea what he’d feel about just anything. 

Still, he brought up his phone, quickly bringing up the contact for his mom, and made damned sure to press the ‘call’ button before he changed his mind about anything, as he did with most things he was unsure, or felt nervous about; it was the method of ripping away a patch quickly, to shorten the amount of time he would suffer. 

Leia would most definitely pick up, actually, she probably would pick up when her son called at any given time of the day, unless she was in the middle of a public speech. Ren could very well imagine his mother getting a call from him in the middle of a meeting, and insisting on taking it, even then; then again, maybe it made sense, it wasn’t like he called very often, and he tried not to call when she was too busy. 

He was right, because after just a little bit, he could hear his mother’s voice. This would be really fucking awkward; it wasn’t like he had been home at all, the past few days. 

“No I’m fine,-...” “Hey, no I’m just outside, Mom, seriously-... Just listen, okay? Yeah. The park. You done?” Well, of course she had a lot to say. There was a moment of silence before he continued, obviously awaiting for her to shut it; “thanks.” Ren rolled his eyes, a lot more theatrically than intended. 

What followed was probably what to Hux would be the most teenager-looking moment of Ren’s existence, in his presence. He was pacing around, a little bit away from the dog owner and three pugs, evidently a little uneasy and restless in his movements. His mother seemed to cut him off mid-speech now and then, as he turned silent now and then, and seemed to be interrupted. Still, he explained, in some manner, that he was going to bring a classmate over, and no he was not dating this classmate, and it was kind of a little bit of an emergency, and that there would be three pugs, and without going to much into it, just asking that the two of them would be remotely left alone, just this once. He could most definitely introduce his friend more properly, and suffer the pain of his family’s company, at any other time, even if preferably not at all, but that time was not today. An exception with food on his room was granted, too. It wasn’t like he ever really obeyed that rule, if he as the one making the food, but otherwise, they usually forced him to stay downstairs at the dinner table.

“... Is Dad home?” 

“... Great. See you soon, yeah, probably like in max twenty. Love you.” 

Without further delay, he walked the few steps back to his classmate, took back the leashes, and then reached out a hand to assist the other in getting up. “Right, yeah, the dogs can stay, I think Chewie might like some company, or hate it, we’ll see I guess; he wouldn’t hurt them, he’s the calmest there is, as long as you don’t attack anyone in the family. Uh yeah, I have a dog, too.” Maybe he was losing his focus a little, rambling sentences in less proper order. 

Maybe it was just getting cold outside, making his cheeks a little redder than usual. 

 

[Hux]  
A normal person, one who hadn’t just agreed to go along to Benjamin ‘Ren’ Solo’s house, might have gotten up from the cold ground but at this point, he didn’t care enough about the cold to get up. The three stooges were walking about, starting to get a little restless with how they paced about but with like every other thing that wasn’t of his immediate interest, he ignored. 

As entertaining it was to watch Ren pace about when he talked to his mother, Hux had something he needed to actually do before he could enjoy himself with being an observer. This something was, of course, contacting his sister and tell him that he would be gone for the night. Unlike Ren, the ginger didn’t feel like he had to spend time explaining things to someone when he didn’t want to so he simply sent his sister a text. 

Received: 06:38  
From: Armie  
I will be gone for the night. The pugs are with me, they will get fed. I usually cover for you, don’t tell father. Also, don’t eat my pudding.   
Hux

When he had written her the text, he tucked the phone back in his pocket, ignoring the vibrations that signaled that she called him. He wasn’t about to talk this over with her. 

The last thing he heard from Ren speaking in the phone was a rather simple ‘love you.’ Hux had never said such a thing to his parent and probably never would. If he thought about it, he probably never really said that to anyone, least of all someone in his family. He didn’t love them and they didn’t exactly love him back; he wasn’t even upset about it, it was just how things were. To him, it was much more uncomfortable to pretend to like someone when everyone knew that they didn’t like one another, as both he and Phasma had learned when they were much younger and pretty new at this whole ‘sibling’ thing.

Either way, Ren was standing beside him now, offering him a hand to help him get up. He didn’t think too hard about it but instead reached out and grabbed the hand, handing the other the leashes as he began to brush himself off. The taller of the teenagers started to ramble, something that caused Hux to look at him like he was a circus attraction. Was Chewie his uncle? Was that a person who tended to attack people and animals that he didn’t like? Oh, it was a dog, apparently. Well then. That made more sense. 

“I see. Well, then I can only hope that none of your family members are made out of bacon. These monsters will stop for no one when they smell that.” He smirked a little before pulling his scarf a little tighter around himself. “So… Where do you live?” 

 

[Ren]  
Well, Ren lived in a place where no one would imagine him to live. Anyone who guessed would likely have guessed an apartment somewhere, or dorms maybe, just anywhere someone with his taste in music, style of clothing and lifestyle was usually portrayed. Then of course, people rarely knew that his mother was no other than the famous politician and rights activist Leia Organa. The woman had a certain appeal to uphold, an image to follow up on, even if her real life was far from a perfect match with said appearances. 

In all honesty, the teenager didn’t want to tell his classmate much about where he lived, because if he was to commit to going through the torture of seeing his family, and letting a friend meet his family, then he sure wanted some sort of amusement as well. Hence, the only thing he ever really told Hux was ‘eh, you’ll see,’ with a wide grin on his lips. 

They walked, and when they walked, they walked to blocks with large expensive villas, and households of the kind, most people expected him to live the exact opposite direction, closer to the city centrum, where there were apartment complexes. The black clad teenager’s walking pace was rather fast, and it seemed the duck trio saw it as some sort of task, to catch up with the apparent pack leader. Still, it was a nice area to live, where there wasn’t too far of a distance from school, even if he’d have to use local traffic for twenty minutes or so to get to school, and well, that really was mostly because the routes for buses in the area just so happened to be very roundabout. What was more intriguing was that he couldn’t possibly live that far from Hux, if both of them had the same walking routes. 

At last, they were walking by the fence of a large villa. The fence was rather old fashioned, but fashionably so, in a darker brown wood with curved black iron details keeping it together. Ren just stopped there, at the gate, looking at his friend for a moment, just to see what sort of reaction there’d be. A large villa in a lighter grey, with two floors, and a garage that was a little unusually big, with a carport that had space for two cars. The plants in the pots were slowly dying out for the winter, but the garden was obviously, while minimalistic and mostly a huge area of grass, still well taken care of. There were just some gatherings of stones, bigger and smaller, with potted plants. It wasn’t much of an effort to keep that way. Someone had obviously hand painted on the rather big mailbox, because it had this rather forest’ish decoration of Organa-Solo written into it, surrounded by leaves and a few flowers, something that was once painted by his uncle, as a Christmas present to the family. The house was a little odd that way, a mix between homely, with hand crafted small decorations, and something big and impersonal that one would see in an advertisement for villas. Of course, his family valued practicality over looks, and therefore the house was just the right amount of stereotypical for it to seem right for Leia’s profession and kind, something that usually became more evident if one knew of his dad’s profession, and the reason for the large garage, or saw the inside of the house, really. There was another hand painted sign on the gate, warning about a big dog, that on the painted picture looked more like a lump of brown hair. If one actually paid attention, there was obvious higher fence on the sides of the big house, and quite some space behind it, it seemed. That, of course, was space for the dog, that Ren was fairly sure was far older than himself, having had the big thing around for as long as he could remember. 

Ren was probably stuck in some bizarre state in between dread and excitement about the whole ordeal, it was very hard to tell. If anything, he looked a bit out of place, as per usual, when about to enter his own home. He didn’t say anything to Hux, but simply dragged the pugs with him to the front porch, and said pugs seemed to be very distracted by all kinds of new smells and impressions, smells probably related to Chewie, or at least so the black haired teenager thought. 

He brought the keys up, taking a deep breath, before unlocking the door and gesturing for his classmate to be welcomed inside. Of course, the dogs were ahead of the both of them. Immediately, Ren began untying and taking off his boots, but realised quick that it was probably better to let the triplets out of their bounds before he continued, all of them being far too excited about this new place. He really did not mind them roaming freely, if anything, his mother would receive a pleasant surprise, and a good indication that they had arrived. 

They were standing in a medium sized hallway, that run along a corridor straight ahead, with more doors and rooms to the right side than the left one. Of course, immediately on the left side was the stairway leading upstairs. It wasn’t all too messy around, but there were a few things here and there, showing signs of life and laziness. The house was a little bit like in those magazines, tapestry and most of the house looking very much taken out of one of the pages, but the decorations were more homely, and there were a lot of dried flowers everywhere, giving a certain scent to the place, one that smelled a little like an autumn forest, among an array of other homely smells, something that always felt nice. Ren didn’t mind his house, just the people he shared it with.   
There were sudden loud barkings of small dogs, evidently the pugs, and an answer of a much deeper bark, that borderline sounded like a bear, rather than any kind of dog. It followed with a delighted gasp of surprise and the voice of an evidently grown woman, obviously surprised by suddenly having dogs run at her feet, or something along those lines, it was hard to tell from just sounds. 

In all honesty, he just wanted to hurry up to his own little sanctuary in this house as soon as possible, and was about to head upstairs. However, as on cue, the second he put a foot on the somewhat creaking staircase, the woman’s voice became slightly louder, and called out to him. “Ben, please come here for a bit,” she voiced, and really, she seemed extra happy, perhaps the pugs were a good distraction to get to avoid his mother. 

Still, he walked over to the first opening to the left, that was just an doorway, leading into the kitchen , stopping pretty much in the doorway. The kitchen seemed a little more personal, as it was very bright, and with natural lighter wood for most shelves and surfaces, with a lot of glass jars, and modern, rather minimalistic in design, storages and tools. There was a lot of greens, and obviously fresh herbs on in pots on the counter, near window. There was a very short woman there, barely reaching the height of Ren’s waist, really, in the middle of what seemed to be making dinner. As it seemed, it was just a bigger chunk of salmon in the oven, boiled potatoes and a simple salad, something not even his mother would mess up, even if he was a little worried that she would have used far too much salt on the salmon, again. Or well, she wasn’t anymore so much in the midst of making food, because she was entirely busy with three happy pugs, enjoying the attention they were getting to the fullest. Next to her, sniffing carefully on the small pugs, but a little careful and distant, was a giant ball of chestnut brown fur, one that felt like he was pretty much as big as the woman, in all honesty. 

Still, when the teenager entered the kitchen doorway, the giant animal walked over to him, pushing his nose up against the hand of the young man, expecting a pat.The dog stayed there for a short while, before he decided to investigate the stranger in the house, mostly sniffing the ginger, looking him up and down, instead of going into any stages of cuddle attacks, the way the pugs did. The dog was evidently very old, and perhaps that was part of his slow and lazy ways when moving about; at least his tail was wagging lazily. 

The woman looked up, getting up from her position crouching on the floor, and smiled warmly, yet politely, at the both of the young men. “Now don’t just stand there, love, give your mother a kiss,” she said, but there was an obvious hint of wit in her voice, as if she was well aware that she was messing with him, and teasing him. Ren did exactly that, leaning his head down a little while passing through the doorway, further having to lean down quite a bit to place a kiss on the cheek of the short woman. She smiled, patting his cheek once, before he straightened up again. She then directed her attention to the guest, smiling in his direction, intelligent dark brown eyes, nearly identical to her son’s seeming to read the young man. “Leia Organa, a pleasure to meet you. Now, I’m sure you boys want to head upstairs, so I’d very much like to know what these little darlings should have for dinner, before then. We usually feed Chewie leftovers of the food, or cook him a proper meal out of some meat and vegetables, would that suffice for these three, as well?” 

There was a noise of a TV, in the room next to the kitchen, seeing there was a doorway leading to a rather large combined dining hall and living room area, where there was a man positioned on the couch, his back turned to them, seemingly watching some sort of drama, judging by a quick look, at least. 

The elderly man turned his head towards the kitchen, not even bothering with introductions, or polite smiles, but simply looked at, what was evidently, his son, speaking in a somewhat hoarse voice. “How was school?” 

“Slow,” Ren replied without a moment’s hesitation, rolling his eyes the second the man turned his head away again. Although, he was glad that his dad wasn’t going to make a deal out of introducing himself, as glad as the fact that his mother was making it brief to, understanding their, or mostly his, desire to be left alone. Still, it really aggravated him that his father couldn’t come up with something better to say than some standard line he probably didn’t give shit about, as if that would suddenly make him seem invested in Ren’s life. 

 

[Hux]  
Hux was not expecting them to turn towards the way he himself lived, if anything, he had thought they would be walking the opposite direction but here they were, walking through somewhat familiar parts of the city. They were however heading in a somewhat different direction until they stopped by a somewhat familiar house. Not because Hux knew about the building itself but because he had walked past it a few times and made notice of the mailbox in all it’s decorative glory. He had never wasted time reading on it and even upon doing so, he would never have connected ‘Solo’ to the same as the school menace surname. He almost held back from asking if he was joking with him but the thought escaped before he managed to catch it. 

“You? Live here?” He blinked and placed a hand over his lips, glancing to the side in pretence ignorance over what he had just exclaimed. Instead he focused on the ridiculous size of the garage that stood out almost as much as the mailbox. Hux couldn’t help but wonder what sort of atlantic cruiser that was needed to make up for the sheer space there must be inside of that thing. He also noticed the sign with the picture of a furball drawn on it, something that he gathered must have been something Ren had drawn when he was young due to that blob looking nothing like a dog to him. 

Then Ren moved forward and he followed, glancing around the minimalist garden to try and spot something out of place. That had been one of the few things that he had learnt from all the social gatherings; to seek weakness or traces of such, in everything from clothing to hair to the polish on someone’s shoes. The garden was flawless enough for him to deem it well taken care off. 

They reached the front porch, or more correctly, the pugs reached it first and competed about pushing their noses the closest to the wood. It was with a feeling of disbelief that he observed as Ren pulled his keys out and opened the door, allowing the ducktales trio to barge in. 

Even inside the house, looking around, it took him awhile to realize that he was standing inside the house where Ren lived. Everything around him was neat but a few traces of laziness could be spotted here and there. There were flowers and a few photos further in that Hux couldn’t quite see from where he was standing. Only after the potatoes were freed did he remember that he was supposed to be removing a few layers of clothing. From what he observed further of the household he still couldn’t find any clear weaknesses from just looking around. 

Speaking of weaknesses, he could hear his dogs bark, followed by the least dog-like noise that he had ever heard in his life. Hux had to glance at Ren to make sure that that was something normal and that a monster hadn’t invaded his home when he was gone. The dog (and bear) noises were followed by a woman’s voice. He assumed that to be Ren’s mother, someone they were apparently trying to avoid, judging from the way the teenager was making his way upstairs. 

Ben made his way over to his mother in the kitchen with a bit of a pouty look, causing Hux who was trying very hard to not be amused by the whole situation, to follow him. The kitchen smelled lovely but the thing that immediately caught his interest was the giant hairy creature who apparently looks exactly like depicted on the fence. Was that really a dog? It looked much more likely to be a genetic mutated experiment on the run from the government. Hux was even less excited when the bear made its way towards them but like the stubborn man he was, he didn’t back away and pretended not to be uncomfortable with it sniffing on him. 

Instead, he focused on the woman before them. Even as he was looking at her, it took him longer than he liked to admit to connect who she was. Leia Organa was a famous woman, one whom his father had long since disliked. She was a very influential politician who seemed to win every debate she ever got into and she was firmly against many of Brendol Hux’s political ideas, making her an enemy. Yet here she was, standing surrounded by dogs, in a green, horrendous fleece shirt and a pair of stretchy jeans. Only when he got a face to the name on the mailbox did his thoughts connect and he glanced at Ren, who was apparently the son of one of his father’s political nightmares. Did Phasma know? This was borderline ridiculous. Did his father know about Ren? He couldn’t, he would have used it against Leia Organa much more openly if he did. 

The whole situation seemed to become all the more bizarre when Leia called her son over for a kiss and got one. If he hadn’t been very good at keeping a straight face, he was sure that he would have ended up making quite an inappropriate one. Hux never had a mother, he was more than a little weirded out by how everything about this woman screamed ‘motherly.’ When she introduced herself, he nodded and gave her a polite smile. 

“Armitage Hux. I am sure you know my father.” Upon the question about the dogs, he nodded again. “I’m sure they would be overjoyed to take part in anything homecooked.” Nothing with the possible exception of coffee was ever homecooked in his household, it was a little strange to remember that people usually made their own food. 

The call from the living room made the ginger turn his head to glance over at the speaker in question. The air seemed to chill as he had spoken, but only so because Ren seemed to project darkness all around himself. Hux took a guess that this was his father, and that the two men of the family didn’t get along all that well. The ginger lightly scratched himself on the cheek with his gloved hand to avoid focusing too much on the tense words that those two exchanged, instead glancing at the salmon in the oven. “It’s quite the beautiful mailbox outside. Very outstanding compared to the others in this neighborhood.” He was mostly talking as to stay out of Ren’s way. 

 

[Ren]  
Leia Organa was indeed so far from anything one would see on a TV debate or in any photography of her, if one was to Google the name, that one might have a bit of a hard time to recognize her. For one, people were often surprised to find just how long her hair actually was, given that they normally only ever saw it strictly and neatly put up in buns varying styles within a spectrum of elaborateness. 

The woman which Ren knew, his mother, was best described by the word ‘warm,’ if one paid attention the the brighter sides of her personality. The son could think of a whole array of more negative traits at well, but among the positive ones was that she was a very honest and real type of person, who could be as calculating and false as the politicians and coworkers she often complained about, if she had to, but the second she had the opportunity, she threw that very facade away and became a very ‘real’ personality. Well, that if anything was something that the teenager appreciated about his mother. 

So far nothing was absolutely chaotic, but he was still thoroughly uncomfortable, and wanted to flee the place as soon as possible. He was still a little upset with his father, he really couldn’t help it. Asking about this day in school as if it meant anything, as if Ren hadn’t been away for the entirety of this week so far, and as if that didn’t matter one bit. It couldn’t be more clear that it was just a fucking formality, and nothing more; at least his mother worried, overbearing as it could be. He just wanted out of there, fast, and just back up to his room.

Meanwhile, the short woman’s gave a knowing smile to her son’s classmate. It didn’t come by any surprise at all, that the, seemingly polite, young man was the son of a man she held much distaste for, partly for his lack of empathy in decision making. Of course, Leia didn’t need more than hearing her son call this boy ‘Hux’ on the phone to figure it out, and of course, while they didn’t look all that alike, the pale ginger hair and eyes said a lot. Well, the furthermost reason for her, in actuality, rather strong distaste for Brendol Hux, was his nature of seeing people as enemies to be crushed, and obstacles in his way, rather than human beings. Still, she would never pin the actions of the father on the son, and thus, while her words may have had a bit of a sour tone to them, she obviously didn’t let it have her treat the boy any differently; “yes, I would believe we are acquainted.” 

Instead, Leia focused on the polite comment about her unique mailbox, and she let out a half silent chuckle to that. “Yes, it was painted by brother, and old gift; I’m glad you like it.” There was a short pause before she spoke again, “dinner will be ready in half an hour or so.” Those words were clearly addressed to both the teens. 

Ren immediately took it as a cue to end his suffering and quickly headed out of the kitchen, fast to head up the stairs to the second floor. The second floor was in itself another medium sized bathroom, his room, and a second living room, and then a door that was for now closed, but was just a storage room, more or less. His proclaimed ‘grandpa’ had once told him that Leia had wanted more than one child, and that it was probably a room meant for the sibling Ren never had. 

There was a ‘Fuck Off’ sign, looking like a self-printed poster, on the door to his room, and well, it was really just there because Ren couldn’t be arsed to pull it down when it had grown comfortable to it’s living space on the door. The same thing could be said for a lot of things in his room. It was messy, but looked surprisingly untouched, and newly cleaned. There was a somewhat big bed, a few bookshelves, shelves in general with trinkets and things, a desk with a computer, and very big speakers to go with it. There was another door that probably led into some sort of closet. The walls were plastered with posters, new and old, and he really couldn’t care less for them being there. The curtains were black, as was mostly every fabric visible in the room, making for a bit of a strong contrast with the otherwise plain walls. Well, there was one wall that had some sort of half-colorful pattern of color splatter, in shades of red, white and black, making part of it look like blood splatter, and it was a tapestry the young Ben Solo had chosen himself. The bookshelf had an array of fantasy novels, most of all, teenage fantasy, adult fantasy, horror fiction, vampire novels; if anything, if the owner of the room had read them all, then he had read a lot of books. Another thing standing out was a stand with an acoustic guitar by the bed. 

Ren was… surprisingly not very uncomfortable with having the ginger in his room. It felt like his past self couldn’t touch him, like the remnants of a thirteen year old boy mattered little to him, seeing that he only ever slept here sometimes, and sometimes used the computer. 

He closed the door behind them and dropped down on the bed, rather quickly, letting out a groan. “Mom said that we could eat up here, at least, so we’re sure as fuck not eating downstairs.” 

 

[Hux]  
This was without a doubt, one of the strangest things to have happened to Armitage Hux. He was standing in the house of one of his father's enemies, having a conversation with Leia ‘don’t-make-me-mad-darling’ Organa about a mailbox, as Benjamin Solo was attempting to cast a spell, which components consisted of black hatred and red rage, at the couch potato that was his apparent father, all this while the ducktales trio had cornered the mutated experiment dog-bear, and were now busying themselves with trying to lick their way to the creature’s face. Hux was smiling, mostly because he had little to no idea what else he he could possibly do in this bizarre situation.

It was clear from the short comment about Brendol Hux that Leia disliked him back, perhaps not as much as he disliked her but certainly quite a bit. What sort of Romeo and Juliet situation was this? It was laughable. So much that it was almost hard for the ginger to wrap his head around it all. 

It was a relief when the black mage made his way towards the stairs, on the cue from his mother, allowing Hux to give one last polite nod and come after him. He was almost worried that the pugs would trail after him and it came as a small relief when they decided that the channel ‘Homely Dinner with a Touch of Family Drama’ was a lot more entertaining program to be invested in. 

It wasn’t hard to figure out which room was Ren’s, the sign on the door made it very easy, it felt so stereotypical that he couldn’t hold back a small chuckle of amusement. They entered and he looked around to find… pretty much what he would have expected from someone like Ren. The most interesting thing was of course the bookcase, Hux made his way over there and started to glance through the titles. Nothing he recognized per-say but it wasn’t especially hard to place the genre to which they belonged. 

He looked up when the other spoke to him, causing the ginger to turn back. It only hit him now that he was standing in Ren’s room. For real. They were alone in a rather small space, not that the room was small but it wasn’t the same as being outside. He remembered their earlier, uh, closeness and that caused his stomach to turn with strange emotions. Hux swallowed as he did everything to avoid looking at Ren. 

“Sounds good. I will just borrow the bathroom a little quickly if you don’t mind? Where is it?” After getting the instruction to where said bathroom was, Hux made his way there. It was a very white bathroom, as they tended to be. It was big with an open glass case of a shower with a green-blue tile floor that was heated up, to the delight of Hux’s cold feet. The towels were all color coded to match the floor and even in here, dried flowers were hung up to spread a pleasant fragrance. The ginger started the somewhat complicated process of pulling his high gloves off and placed them on the sink. He did his business and walked back to wash his hands, in doing so, he looked up and spotted his looks in the mirror. To his horror, he looked like a complete mess with hair pointing everywhere. The eyes looked somewhat puffy but not enough to make it obvious that he had been crying. He almost thought of trying to smoothen the hair back with some water but that made him feel like Ren would laugh at him. Hux really didn’t feel like being laughed at right this evening, thus, he gave in and started to pull his gloves back on again. 

When he left the bathroom, the sound of angry voices hit his ears from downstairs. He heard Leia Organa yell at her husband for not having introduced himself, acting as if the kids weren’t welcome. The husband countered with that she had told him to leave them both alone and not be pushy. The Hux from a few weeks back would have delighted in this, he would have been overjoyed to mock Ren for having parents who were fighting, delighted in knowing a weakness. Yet, the Hux that stood upstairs in the Organa-Solo household that day hurried towards Ren’s room as to not hear anymore of the yelling. 

He closed the door and found that he couldn’t hear anything from downstairs like this. “Before anything else… I do so loathe you for what you have done to my hair.” Hux walked over to the desk chair and sat down, crossing both arms and legs as he leaned back, huffing slightly as he slowly came to realize that Ren’s scent was strong all around him, even if the teenager wasn’t spending that much time in this place. “Second, that tapestry is ridiculous. Why in the world would you choose something like that as a decoration? Further, what in the world is that animal you keep in this house? Are you absolutely positive that it’s a dog? It looks like a mutated experiment that you are all hiding from the police; what breed is it?” Nervousness was making him bark out a whole collection of questions as he tried very hard to not reveal how nervous he actually was to be here. Alone. With Ren. In his bedroom. With a bed. 

 

[Ren]  
Ren had more or less just flopped down onto the bed, doing a very controlled belly flop onto it, face down into the pillows. He just… needed it to cool down for a moment. 

Hux allowed him just that, when the other headed over to the bathroom, after a bit of instructions, not that it was hard; it was the door to the right, right outside the door to his room. It left the black haired teen alone in his own room for a while, alone with his thoughts, for better or worse. He really did need a moment to wrap his head around what the Hell had just happened, and what the Hell he actually wanted with all this. What was his plan? Did he have a plan? Probably not, he didn’t usually bother with having a plan. 

In any other scenario, he would have dreaded letting someone in school into his house a lot more, but it really wasn’t as bad as he had imagined it. Hux didn’t seem like the sort of person who would actually ruin his life, just a person who was all bark and no bite, and a little too emotional for managing long time strategies of evil plans. Well, perhaps the ginger had just proved himself earlier today, when his reaction to finding the perfect blackmail material, that could potentially cause a lot of trouble, was to punch the guy who sent it. Perhaps, just a little bit, in some weird time and space, which seemed like a different reality altogether, maybe, just maybe, Ren actually felt that he could trust his friend, and the notion of that did make him quite a bit anxious. It was like asking for being betrayed, or so his mind wanted to tell him, yet, there was another nagging part who didn’t seem to believe in any of those warnings. The biggest deal, of course, was the fact that he would turn into a far more visible scandal if people actually connected the dots and realised that he was the son of Leia Organa, but surprisingly, his mind wanted to tell him to trust Hux with that, no matter how dreadful it felt. 

He should just try to not think about it, really, he wanted to be just like any other teen, after all, and not someone special, at least not in that way, which led his mind to wander in other directions. Ren most certainly didn’t mean to, but he couldn’t help to get stuck in the awareness of what had happened to Hux, guilt washing over him again like a fucking rainstorm. Another realisation that came with it was that he probably wouldn’t be able to, for at least quite a fucking while, hang out with that group of people, since they seemed to just ‘deal’ with Mike, and were rather close. After their own screw up in the past, he was just fine still being around those people. Now… it was hard to tell what the fuck changed. Somehow, he imagined it’d be impossible to be around that shithead without glaring at him like he expected the man to choke on air, from the sheer force of Ren’s anger. Fuck okay, fine. He had to calm the Hell down, because the shit had already happened no matter how he turned it around in his head; besides, it really wasn’t his fucking responsibility, no matter what his mind kept on telling him. So why did he invite Hux over after such a thing? He couldn’t really tell. 

Hux really had done something that no one in Ren’s environment had done previously; he had treated him like a victim of someone’s crime. It was nearly impossible for the overgrown teenager to figure out exactly how he felt about it, but there was still a difference. It was an inevitable fact that people around him had a hard time seeing him as a victim of just anything, due to his size and general strength, mentally and physically, or at least, the one he portrayed, perhaps due to the fact that he was a man too, who knows. Still, there was something about him that made people decide he wasn’t a victim to anything, really, in a scenario where someone else would have been. The ultimatum the ginger had given him, a little half-heartedly and not quite so clearly, was still more than most had managed; there was no fucking way to deny the fact that what he had been through was worse than what Hux went through, and yet, none of it could be proclaimed Hux’s fault. Then, if it wasn’t Hux’s fault in any way that someone else decided to go too far, how could it possibly be Ren’s fault in any way whatsoever that someone decided to abuse the notion that he was more or less passed out? The answer was simple, it really wasn’t on him. Anyway, he’d much rather just fucking forget all that about himself. 

Much more pressing, how did one act like a teenager with a friend over, again? It was plain fucking stupid, really, but Ren really did feel a lot more grown up than he was, some sort of illusion created by his surroundings. Everything had felt grown up, a few weeks ago when he had brought Hux to the café, but like this, they really were just high schoolers hanging out at one of their places; that was something surprisingly unfamiliar to him. The ginger returned about then, closing the door behind himself. For just a moment, Ren could hear his parents argue, and very much appreciated that the redhead closed the door so quickly, and even further, didn’t mention any of that. It really was fucking embarrassing how his parents just couldn’t behave themselves. He rolled over on his back, trying to keep up with the array of questions which Hux had decided to throw at him, sounding as neurotic as ever. Actually, he sounded nervous, and seemed visibly nervous. 

Ren probably felt more lost than nervous. Part of him wanted to tease Hux, a lot, about the apparent nervousness, in more or less subtle ways, depending on context, yet, that only made him come to the same very conclusion that they were in fact in the same enclosed space, both very much into guys, both, probably, somewhat attracted to each other, and both miserable fucking shitheads who wouldn’t quite want to admit that. That really was all there was needed, wasn’t it; the awareness was enough. The awareness made the head trail off into tracks of all possible things those two could do alone, one more ridiculous than the other, and the black haired teenager had no idea why it seemed to make him nervous, it wasn’t exactly like any of this was new to him, right? He didn’t think so. Besides, the whole context of what the ginger had been through a few weeks ago made anything of the sort seem even more ridiculous. 

“You really do look a lot better with your hair like that, it’s hot,” Ren retorted rather quickly, grinning at the other. Teasing sounded absolutely perfect, focusing on how much he could poke and prod to cause a reaction in his friend was a good distraction from his own nerves and confusion to what to do. 

When Hux pointed out the thing about his tapestry wall, he shrugged and glanced over at it for a moment, before speaking, nonchalantly and uninterested; “I’ll pass on a notion to the thirteen year old who wanted it, of how horrible it is.” Why should he care about choices he made as a child. 

“Chewie? Uh, well, yeah, he’s a dog. I don’t exactly know what breed, I know he’s a mixed breed, at least, you’d have to ask da-... I’ll ask later. I think he’s basically way older than me, so I don’t know all that much; I think dad had him even before he got together with mom.” 

Alright, those things weren’t all that awkward, it was a start, still, silence fell over them rather quickly again, and it made him audibly groan. 

“Are you going to sit all the way over there?” It wasn’t the smoothest invitation, but it was something. “Are we just, I don’t know, done talking about all the shit from before? Because it sure doesn’t feel like it.” Maybe he could talk about some of it, a little, even if it upset him, if it meant that he’d figure out what the Hell they were doing right now, and what was going on. 

 

[Hux]  
His face turned a tad more bitter as he was backhanded a compliment from the other relating to his hair. To someone else, that could have been flirting, but to the ginger it only felt like an insult, a mockery. Hux rolled his eyes as an answer and let the other continue speaking. 

He had nothing else to say about the wall, but he sure had one hell of a lot of things that he wanted to comment on about the thing that Ren so casually called a dog. From the explanation he got concerning the creature, he only became more certain that if it was not an experiment, then at least it was an alien. His eyes clearly reflected just how skeptic he was concerning the creature. 

During the silence that fell when Ren had awkwardly spoken about his father, Hux looked around more in the room, specifically at the posters that he saw around them on the walls. He amused himself with connecting the bandnames to the T-shirts that the big teenager liked to wear. From the posters alone, he managed to count seven before he was interrupted by the other. What he said caused the ginger’s face to blossom with red. 

Hux had started to feel somewhat comfortable around Ren with the fact that he was gay, it had come to be just normal. Now, knowing that the other didn’t exactly fall into the category of straight, things seemed just a little more… awkward. Hux had been trying very hard to not acknowledge the fact that the killer whale was, all in all, handsome. He had a bit of a different structured face that made him rather unique and his dark eyes were absolutely perfect for drowning in. He had attractive, big lips and a well trained, big body, that felt very nice to hide against. As a simple matter of fact, staying far away from him with his legs crossed seemed to be an absolutely wonderful thing to do, when it came to keeping himself in further denial over how much Ren attracted him. 

“Why, yes, this chair is perfectly fine for me.” He nodded as he scooted back a little on the chair in question. “Besides, Leia Organa said that there would be food in about half an hour, I have no intentions of letting her misinterpret this whole situation by coming over to your bed.” As he said the words bed, in singular, he realized something. There was but one bed and no sofa whatsoever. After a quick glance around the room, he returned to look at the other teenager with a lot stricter eyes that he had intended to. “...Where exactly were you planning on me sleeping, Ren?” That was a lot more of a bark than he had intended for it to be. 

He wasn’t exactly ignoring or avoiding the last comment about continuing to talk, not that he wanted to talk much more about it, as a simple matter of fact, he couldn’t have been more happy about not discussing things further than what they had already done. However, when the revelation of the single bed hit him, his mind ended up in a one track and he couldn’t focus about any other thing than the things that could happen if the two of them were to sleep next to one another. It made his whole face as red as his hair, even the ears had joined into the forest of red at this point. 

 

[Ren]  
Right, he nearly forgot that Hux could be such a fucking pain in the ass, sometimes. That was mostly because the neurotic teenager had a tendency to just ignore someone unless he saw fit to answer something. To Ren, he was just being prissy and annoying with it, not having all that much insight to what the ginger was actually thinking. 

Said ginger-... had a good point about the rightful owner of this household. In all honesty, Ren had absolutely no idea how these situations played out in his family, at least not from the point of view that the son would drag someone home that he had an actual interest in. He thought a bit of the stereotypes of parents, who would think that any girl you brought home was someone you had a romantic interest in. Well, even if he never did it, bringing home just any ‘guy friend’ was supposedly normal, and he had already mentioned that it was just a friend, on the phone, when talking to his mother. The worst part about thinking of such a thing was that it still raised the question for what he wanted to do with Hux, and exactly what they were. He… really hadn’t figured it out yet. He was somewhat convinced that he wanted just a friend, but he wouldn’t lie to say that he was curious, to say the least, about the prospect of anything more. Maybe, just maybe, he felt a little guilty as well, there was an illogical part within him that kind of wanted to give the ginger what the shithead those weeks back had failed; well, eh, it didn’t have to be sex in particular, just,... closeness? Was he allowed to do that? Was he the right person to do that? This was all damned confusing. 

“... Fine, whatever,” was all he could think of saying to that, really, at least at first. 

Then something seemed to hit the neurotic teenager like an imaginary punch to the face, making the other visibly embarrassed. How Hux had proclaimed to be a good liar with a straight face, Ren would never understand. It took a bit of time for the owner of the room to figure out what exactly had gotten to his friend this time, but once he thought of it, it was becoming pretty damned clear what was bothering the other so much. Ren really had just thought they could share the bed, perhaps, or so he thought that he did, because he barely had given it a thought, even less a conscious one. Well, perhaps it was a bit of a habit, when he was used to sleeping in the same bed as whoever he was staying with. 

“Eh, I didn’t think anything at all about it. The bed is big enough for two, and there’s a mattress to go get if you feel like making a fuss about it,” he pointed out, very nonchalantly. 

“Where are you planning on sleeping?” 

 

[Hux]  
Had his life really come to this point? Not counting all the other bizarre things that had happened this evening, here he was standing before the hardest choice that he had ever been asked to make. One that Ren just delivered to him in such a nonchalant way, complete with a shrug. 

Hux’s heart was racing, it felt like the walls had blurred out, and that Ren was hovering somewhere in space, with his stupidly brown eyes that just begged to be looked at. The redhead was probably sweating quite a bit as well, his gloves were getting uncomfortably warm. 

Did he want to share the bed with the other teenager? Part of him yelled that it was bloody Benjamin Ren Solo that was telling him to sleep next to him, the man probably had enough parasites in his hair to have Hux smell for days afterwards. Another side reminded him just how very lovely it had been to have Ren hug him, when he was totally not crying, and that the parasites probably wasn’t so bad. A third pointed out that with the way Ren’s home looked, he probably didn’t have any parasites in the first place, to which all the other sides yelled back that he bounced around to houses more than an average mosquito changed victims. 

After realizing that his mind had evolved into a giant fight of conflicted feelings, Hux lightly shook his head to regain some semblance of awareness. Ren was looking at him… He had to decide. He couldn’t just sit here and have monologues in his own head. 

It was simple. Did he want to sleep wit- next to the big teenager? Yes. Yes he did. Despite everything else, despite it all, it had been so nice to be close to him, to have been held and comforted. Hux was not a man that was used to such things and after having had the taste of it, he wanted more. He wanted whatever could be given to him, like a greedy child who would rather stuff himself full than risk someone else eating his candy. 

The ginger slowly parted his lips after having stretched the silence into the realm of ‘way uncomfortable.’ “...Yes.” 

The silence lasted for a bit longer until he realized that he hadn’t answered the question at all. He coughed to hide his embarrassment. “I… I mean… I am not making a fuss. I will sleep in the same bed as you.” 

He said it! He had actually manage to say it. Hah! Oh God, what had he just agreed to? 

 

[Ren]  
Yet again, it seemed that they were caught in some pretty damned awkward long silence. Ren wanted to entirely blame the ginger for that, not in any way considering himself the awkward type; yep, it was definitely just Hux’s fault for being so damned awkward, not in any way that the taller of the two felt nervous as well, never. 

It was starting to become a tad irritating, but then, finally the ginger spoke up, and Ren’s immediate reaction was a somewhat wide grin, that he mostly wasn’t aware of himself; he was looking a little bit smug, definitely. 

Whenever he made Hux agree to something he was aware the prissy brat wouldn’t, normally, in a million years, he felt damned satisfied with himself, like he had managed with something incredible that no one else could, and it was exciting him a surprising amount. The grin probably looked a little bit more predatory than intended, he had no idea, he was just excited, for reasons he wouldn’t dwell too much on; different from Hux, for most part, Ren managed to live without overthinking, Hell, it’s what kept him alive, and he had been doing far too much overthinking as of lately.

“Great, I don’t want to drag that thing out of storage,” he pointed out, to not leave the awkward brat hanging for too long, after such a display. It was really fucking amusing. 

Although, his amusement seemed to jump in between being amused by Hux and then feeling awkward as well, it was getting a tad annoying. 

There was some time before dinner, still, so he asked Hux if there was anything specific he’d like to do, and with a bit of struggle, it seemed the awkward fuck was actually a bit curious about his music. That was something, at least, and well, it immediately gave the black haired teenager an idea. Once again, it wasn’t like he listened only to a single defined genre, and it always felt good to prove a fucker wrong by playing something he knew Hux would like somewhat. Hence, he started the computer and brought up Spotify, and searched through the albums of the progg-rock band Marillion, until he found the album Marbles, thus, The Invisible Man started playing, and he really just let it play. He had a feeling that classic rock, slow, balladic and of the progg-rock genre, would be something that the ginger would appreciate somewhat, at least. 

It felt like a waste to walk back to the bed, and thus, he really just sat down on the floor right next to the desk, leaning a little bit on the leg of said desk, looking up at Hux on the chair, but mostly, enjoying the music. He looked at the other, gaze searching for reactions or any sort of indication to what the other thought of the music. There… wasn’t much to say, but music filled the silence, and lyrics were sort of important, when it came to Marillion, and so he told the other to actually listen to what the singer was singing. 

After a while, his phone buzzed, and he brought it up to see a text telling him that food was ready. His mother had since long given up on thinking that shouting at him would give any results, given how often he shut them out with music. 

Ren let out a half-silent grunt as he got up on his feet; “ey, there’s food.” 

Lucky for them, it seemed their parents had brought food to the living room table and were watching something rather intensely, meaning that Leia only turned around to glance at them briefly. 

Further, it seemed that Hux was damned lucky to be here at a time when his classmate’s mother managed her cooking decently, because the food wasn’t awful, just a little too spiced, if anything. About the time they had returned, Fantastic Place had started playing on the Spotify list, and for a moment, he felt the urge to skip to the next song, but didn’t want to seem like he was making an effort, uh, well, eh it wasn’t really that important. It used to be a favourite song of his, when he was much younger, back then feeling a far stronger connection to the lyrics. 

Really though, what the Hell were they to do? There were obviously still unspoken shit between them, even if Hux didn’t seem to want to talk about things. Maybe later then, for now eh, what did Hux ever do during his free time?

“Eh, wanna watch a movie or something?” 

 

[Hux]  
Killer whale. 

The first word that came to him as he watched mr. big, dark and scary grin was: killer whale. He looked like one, a predator that would very much like to swallow him whole. The smile was somewhat unsettling, and not only because it made his crotch feel warm, but because it made him feel exposed in a way he wasn’t completely comfortable with. Hux looked away with a huff, trying to just ignore the stinging feeling of shame that came from just having imagined Ren grinning at him like that from in between Hux’s legs. He wasn’t entirely sure how the conversation shifted into music but he agreed to listen to some of the music, that Ren was apparently eager to show him. He didn’t imagine being interested or impressed by it, yet anything was better than the awkward silence that seemed to jump at the two teenagers every chance it got. 

Hux leaned back in the chair, watching as the other started some music he never heard off. He had a tad skeptical as he was told to listen to the lyrics, but did as he was asked. The song started, and right away he was impressed. He wasn’t ready for the music to sound anywhere like it did, softer, slower and much more than just screaming. Then the singer began to sing, Hux wasn’t sure he had ever heard a voice like it. It was so soft and gentle, able to take tones and hold notes that he certainly wasn’t ready for him to take. Judging from the amused looks Ren gave him from down on the floor, the killer whale was beyond satisfied to have surprised him like this. Without thinking too hard about him, Hux rewarded him for his efforts with a toejab in the big teenager’s side. 

A little later, when the phone buzzed, Hux realized that he was actually quite hungry. They walked down together with the ginger half expecting to hear the parents still yell at one another but to his relief, there was nothing like that waiting for them. Hux looked for his poor excuses for dogs, as they were not in the kitchen. He soon spotted half a butt over by the sofa and figured that they were up to their usual theatre play of ‘please kind people, we don’t get fed at home.’ Being a tad skeptic, he picked less of the food and more or the vegetables, something that he wasn’t going to regret as he was not used to spicy food. 

Ren suddenly seemed nervous as they came back up to his room, causing some confusion for the ginger for a few seconds before he heard the lyrics of the song. It wasn’t like those words meant something, it was just, well, words that a singer sang. The man would never meet them or know that they existed, it wasn’t like the lyrics were meant for them. So why did his cheeks end up heating. 

“Movie sounds good.” He jumped at the opportunity to not invite the awkwardness again. After some short questions back and forth, Ren picked the movie and he was more or less forced to sit down in the bed since he wouldn’t see anything if he insisted on staying on the chair. They ended up sitting a little away from each other, mostly because Hux felt uncomfortable with being by the other’s arm. 

The movie that the other picked turned out to be The Imitation Game, something that Hux hadn’t watched before. It showed to be a movie set during World War II, about an autistic mathematician who solved the Enigma, back then history’s most complicated coded machine, that the Nazis used to communicate. It was obviously a very important historical event, but what was more important than that, at least to the young homosexual, was that the main character was also homosexual. Hux had been rather skeptical about even liking the movie but at the end, he was more or less sitting in Ren’s lap, with a very firm grip on his arm and with tears in eyes. 

“You… you’re an… ass…” He managed to hic out between the tears. It felt ridiculous to be this affected by a movie but he couldn’t lift his head from the other’s shoulder. This was the third time in two days that he was bawling in front of this asshat, at this point, he almost wasn’t ashamed. Almost. All things considered, it was pretty nice to just use Ren as a tear sponge, not to mention that the scent of the teenager happened to be very pleasant and calming, as an added bonus. 

 

[Ren]  
It was a wonder Hux had any friends at all, which to Ren’s knowledge, consisted pretty much of him, right of the moment. He was being absolutely impossible when it came to choosing a movie, being very firm on the matter that he had absolutely no opinion, and no taste or preference to speak of whatsoever; it got pretty damn annoying. No matter how Ren tried to ask for what kind of thing he wanted to watch, or gave examples, the ginger just shrugged it off to a point where it became clear that he’d be of no help to pick any movie at all, well, fucking great. 

Actually… it didn’t have to be that bad. Escapism was a second nature to the edgy teenager, and just as well as him having read a lot of books, he had also watched a fuckton of movies. It was practically family tradition; a movie meant that they all shut their mouths and managed to not create a drama for two hours or so, and could almost enjoy time together. Although, it had been a while since he had watched anything with his parents. A movie was a good thing to just take your mind off other thoughts. 

It gave him an idea, something to be a little smug about, yet again. He wanted to give it a shot, because Hux was practically, probably unaware of it himself, challenging the taller of the two to find a movie that he would like. Luckily, it didn’t even take long to think of a movie that was probably the perfect combination of what someone like Hux would like, or per definition appreciate. 

The Imitation Game had all the elements that someone pretentious like the ginger would appreciate, while having a few things that would probably be genuinely personally touching the teenager, beside the obvious amazing acting and well scripted movie. Benedict Cumberbatch did an amazing portrayal of Alan Turing, and the movie had all those little well scripted elements to make someone emotionally invested. To add to that, it was a second world war movie, telling of both the cracking of the German Enigma, as well as the invention of the computer. Then, of course, came the little extra special part, about the fact that the main character was gay, and they show it clearly, as well as showing a bit of the life of fear homosexuals had to live in, during the time, and how they often just married someone they could tolerate, for the sake of not being suspected for the crime of homosexuality. It wasn’t precisely a plot, and barely even a subplot, of the movie, but it showed a bit of historical accuracy, and awareness of historical wrongdoings. 

After a bit of conviction, he managed to coax Hux to sit on the bed with him, which was mostly because he considered the prissy ginger to be acting positively ridiculous with the distance he was taking; Ren wasn’t that fucking disgusting or weird, and it was just hurtful when the other acted like he was the Plague itself, at least a little. 

However, that hurt didn’t last very long, not at all. The more of the movie that passed, the closer the ginger got to him, and honestly, Ren wondered if Hux even noticed how clingy he was getting. Evidently not, well, that or he didn’t care anymore, because the movie seemed to be getting to him a lot. Ren wasn’t precisely the type of person to cry a lot, the only recent time he had cried recently was in front of the shithead that was now clinging to him. Instead, whatever emotions he was experience, unless turning to rage, were usually visible in his eyes, but not more than that. Besides, this was a movie that he had watched before, which took away a bit of the magic, even if he was getting a bit emotional this time too, it just wasn’t very visible. 

He won. There was a great damn sense of achievement finding that his friend was emotional enough to cry over the movie, and to that, cry on his shoulder. This was bordering much more onto a situation like those when Ren normally would be doing a lot more intimate things than just watching an emotional movie and cuddling. They were technically cuddling, or so one could say, at least, when Hux was cuddling up to him, seeking comfort. It felt good and comfortable. He glanced down at the other, looking at the evident mess he had become, and grinned when Hux called him an ass for showing him a good and touching movie, that was so very like the brat to say, but to this, that was only further proof of his evident victory. 

He looked at Hux’s nearly ridiculously red lips for a moment. 

For said moment he had an impulse, but rather than acting on it, he completely froze up, and felt surprisingly strange about the idea of wanting to kiss Hux, of all people. He did though. It was nearly an impulse he did just for the mood and the damned setting of the other clinging to him while being cute, because he was being damned cute, and at that, made Ren feel really damned good about himself for being the source of comfort to someone like the mess of a teenager next to him. 

His pulse was rising a little, and he was feeling a nearly uncomfortable tingle run over his skin, obviously just his imagination. It felt like his mind had just temporarily melted, losing its ability to think coherent thought trails, due to thinking of what those very red lips would feel like, and if they would turn even redder, if he was making out with the ginger aggressively enough. He was pretty sure that he was going to break into a damn cold sweat, and that was, straight out, fucking embarrassing. Why would he feel so fucking stressed and nervous about kissing someone? Sure, they had known each other for some time, distantly so, but this little growing thing of a friendship they had had been going for what, almost a month? He didn’t need to count any of the time for reasons for or against whether he should kiss the other, he wasn’t the type to care. 

Yeah, fuck, he wanted to surprise the other out of the blue. A part of Ren had always been up in the clouds, imagining himself to be in different situations, and imagined himself as the protagonist of his own story, like so many others that wanted to escape reality. He wanted to be the good fucker who provided a kiss to the awkward ginger, and who made the other feel like it wasn’t wrong to be gay, or well, simply do good shit for someone, he supposed, someone whose reactions were incredibly fucking rewarding. 

So why was he feeling like a newborn calf all of a sudden? It wasn’t like he didn’t know how to kiss someone. Why was he overthinking and not managing to think at all, at the same time? Why the Hell was his mind half-heartedly rushing through a lot of strange what ifs and scenarios. He was fairly certain that Hux wanted the kiss, and normally, he’d not mind that much to give it a try, so why the fuck was it so hard? Hell, it shouldn’t be hard. Although, maybe it would be a bad idea, after all. Why? He had no idea, he was just nervous about shit he didn’t quite understand and it was alarmingly distressful. 

Okay fuck it, now he was just going to do it to prove to himself that he could do it, just to end this stupid internal debate. Hence, he reached his hand free arm over, and used the hand to pull Hux chin up a little, making it easy to lean in and kiss him. Quick, and fast, but he was stuck, apparently, immediately setting onto tasting all he could of those lips. The lips were wonderfully soft, but a little dry. He had no idea his pulse was speeding up further. Fuck, he’d be kind of upset if Hux pushed him away now, and that was one terrifying fucking thought, that felt like it came out of nowhere, really. This whole thing felt awkward to a degree he hadn’t felt before, even though he hadn’t, to his own knowledge, showed the distress of his. Still, he wanted it, it was just actually kind of freaky to know that someone had the power to upset him, and further, to make it damned awkward in school if he did. Were there stakes? He didn’t honestly know, he hadn’t figured out when he came to care about Hux. Perhaps he hadn’t, perhaps he was just like horny teenagers were supposed to be, and this impulse was good enough, because Hux was attractive in all those ways that made Ren feel good about himself, and unattractive in ways that he could tolerate. While this felt stupid, naive, and rushed, it really was usually how things ended up.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Bonus content:


	8. Dear Diary: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Alright, so-... how do you want us to do it? You have to be a little more specific.”
> 
> Let’s be real, he had no idea how the other teenager preferred things to be, and it would be way better for the two of them, if they actually communicated what they wanted. It was even more important to communicate with someone who was inexperienced; reality isn’t scripted, and he wouldn’t automatically do things the right way, and Hux wouldn’t automatically not have any preferences, or automatically like just any experience, because he lacked experience, that was just purely unrealistic; this wasn’t a movie, or a porn manuscript. He wasn’t going to risk any discomfort for his friend, just because he wanted to live out any of his fantasies, that were the sort of things that ones agreed upon, or learnt to figure out how to experience together, with time.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Smut ahoy, like, actual nice smut. 
> 
> While we could have dragged this out more, let's be real, those two nerds couldn't keep it in their pants any longer than that. 
> 
> A quick note is that you might end up noticing us have a taste for writing sex scenes realistically, devotedly realistically, meaning that if you want to read the usual, less realistic, fantasies of anal sex, you are probably reading the wrong fic. Who knows, it might even be educational.

[Hux]  
Crying tended to come with small headaches, if one cried longer than a certain amount of time. Hux did not want to have a headache from crying, thus he was doing his best to stop. He sniffed and took a deep breath, deciding to no longer press his face into the other’s shoulder. Perhaps he should blow his nose, just to not look like such a mess, perhaps a mess was alright, but a snotty mess? He did not want that much in common with the ducktales trio. He only managed to begin to look for tissues before he suddenly had Ren in his face, complete with a pair of lips that pressed against his.

His brain completely flatlined at that point.

What. Had. Just. Happened.

Ren was kissing him? And he was kissing back.

Somewhere in the back of his mind, he wanted to object, to say something, to push the teenager away and make him apologize for the sudden violation of privacy that was going on. Instead, his body was doing the exact opposite; after a second of confusion, his lips clumsily moved back against the other’s.

How could Ren be like this? Without hesitation, without thinking it over, he was in his space, taking him with surprise like this. It must be ever so freeing, to not care or worry enough to stop him from doing, well, anything. Perhaps this wasn’t the time to complain, seeing as he had gotten exactly what he was too afraid, and too far into denial, to ask for.

Speaking of the kiss… Ren’s lips were warm and soft, when he was this close, he could feel faint scents of smoke on him, as well as the scent of shampoo, and traces of some hair products. He didn’t think of it, but his hands moved, lightly grabbing the teenager’s shirt, as the kiss became a tad deeper. Hux was not good at kissing, but he did what he could, taking it slow, as his heart was threatening to escape his chest. He felt the touch of the other’s tongue on his lips and simply surrendered to the wants that burned inside of him. Ren’s tongue reached his own and found the metal orb on Hux’s tongue, the remains of his one and only clear act of rebellion. Only at that point, when the kiss had turned into making out with one another, did Hux pull back.

He was not as red as he could have, he had certainly been a lot more red in the face earlier that day and that evening, now, the blushing had reached a somewhat moderate, but still clearly visible, amount. He didn’t look at the teenager before him, stubbornly staring at the chair in the room.

“...If you tell anyone about it… I will… do something… not nice to you…” He mumbled before surrendering to the impulse of hiding against the other’s shoulder, lacing his arms around the big, well trained, body. At least, there, he was hidden enough to not be as exposed as if he remained seated before the other and in full view.

 

[Ren]  
It certainly wasn’t the best kiss Ren had ever partaken in, obviously; Hux was quite literally shit at kissing. Apparently, that had little to no meaning to him now that his heart rate probably matched the speed of the young man he was kissing, not that either of them would be aware of that fact.

It didn’t stop the more experienced teenager from deepening the kiss, most definitely not trying to be any sort of show off, and definitely not as a statement of any kind, it was sure as Hell just him trying to give Hux a good experience, only that and nothing else.

Something provided one Hell of a distraction, causing Ren to nearly stop in the middle of what he was doing, in surprise. Of all the people he knew, Hell, all the people on the planet even, Hux might just be the last person he would think had gotten himself a piercing; a tongue piercing nonetheless; that was hot as fuck. In all honesty, that little surprise might as well have made his blood rush a little lower, towards certain areas, and he kissed the other even more hungrily, playing with the piercing with his own tongue. There was more than one fun thing that could be done with a tongue piercing… Okay fuck, maybe that was taking this a little too far, and now he wasn’t thinking things through, at all. That was like, way ahead of them and what was going on there and then, and Hux broke the kiss, great, he should stop himself, anyway.

He knew that the ginger was embarrassed, but he had honestly almost hoped to warrant an even stronger reaction from the other, to clear the embarrassment in the air, that seemed to be contagious enough for him to feel nervous, making him swallow rather hard once. He wasn’t that out of breath, he simply needed to take a deep one or two after having been too busy to breathe properly for a bit.

That borderline terror he had felt for a moment, realising to his own dismay that Hux could in fact hurt him, and that he had somehow, in some unknown way, fucked up enough to care, vanished quickly when the other’s only real reaction to it was to threaten him meekly about telling others.

“Who the Hell am I going to tell, your sister?” he questioned, kind of perplexed. Why on Earth would it be anyone else’s business whatever the two of them did in a room alone; the only one worth pestering or teasing about it was, of course, Hux himself.

Illogically, or illogically he thought, his heart skipped a beat when his classmate cuddled up to him, hiding in the process. Yeah, this could be a lot fucking worse, and so far he liked it a lot, and didn’t want to think any more about why he liked it, because then he might end up overthinking as much as previously.

Instead, he snuck an arm around the other and pulled backwards, well, more to the side than backwards, but enough to tilt them both over and have them fall down into the bed. Then, before he got nervous enough to chicken out, he pulled both his arms around the other, pulling him up a little to his own eye level, and honestly, Hux weighed even less than he expected the other to. There was still room for the other to hide against him, even like this, but he still leaned in, in an attempt to kiss the other one more time.

 

 

[Hux]  
Hux raised at eyebrow at the comment about his sister, “why would you tell her? She already knows.” He stated, but realized almost right away that he had made a mistake with what topic they were actually discussing, seeing as Ren just gave him a skeptic look. “...You meant the kiss. I thought you were talking about, uh… the… piercing…” He felt stupid saying it out loud, but before he could blame himself for it, the other teenager laced an arm around him, and they tumbled down in the bed.

Ren moved him as if he was a doll, or more accurately, as if he was as light as one. Hux didn’t have time to make any comments before he was placed on the same eye-height as the other, laying next to the much bigger teenager in front of him. He was quickly caught in a hug that effectively trapped both his arms in a way that Ren might have meant to do, but that might also just be a coincidence. Then the lips approached very fast, but stopped long enough for the ginger to decide to actually kiss him again.

Hux curled together a little before stretching his neck out and connected their lips in another kiss. He didn’t know for how long or how much they made out with one another, but he did recall somehow managing to sneak his arms out of the lock and actually pull his gloved fingers through the other male’s ridiculously thick hair, during their make out session. When Ren finally pulled back, Hux was completely out of breath, softly panting, as he glanced up at the other’s face. He managed to meet the other’s eyes for exactly 0,046 nanoseconds, before he was hiding against the other’s chest again, once more hugging him.

“Bet you’re… having a great time right now… It must be hilarious to do this to someone who has no idea how to do it, themselves…” He muttered into the teenager’s chest, suddenly feeling a strong distaste for himself taking form on his tongue. “Someone like you, who can have anyone… Why the Hell are you wasting time with me? Are you just trying to be nice? Or am I an easy target?” It felt good to just throw the accusations and fears at the other one, letting the steam of all his anxieties out.

 

 

[Ren]  
It wasn’t like Hux was that fast of a learner, but anyone making out for a few minutes, and not being a complete idiot, would figure out how to kiss to some degree, especially when kissing someone who actually had experience in the matter, hence, it was getting better. That pretty much was probably part of Ren’s goal, right there and then, it would obviously be a lot more comfortable for the both of them. It was a plan, but a rather poorly thought through plan, because he hadn’t any real plan for what came next, except maybe more cuddles and intimacy, and yeah, fine, he would probably not deny the other sex.

Hux was attractive, genuinely so, and Ren had to force himself to admit that, during the little break they had of catching their breaths, after making out again.

“Okay-... so what, you’re saying it’s fine if I tell people about the kiss then?” He fucking had to comment on the trap the other had verbally ensnared himself into; Hux set right up for that one. The black haired teenager grinned in amusement, feeling evidently smug about it all.

Still, it rather quickly vanished, when the young man in his arms started accusing him of complete bullshit. First of all, Ren really didn’t believe he could have anyone. The only reason he could have many was that those people were within the same category of being as easy going as himself, simply wanting a bit of an escape from the world around them. That was not in any way the same as being popular and easily getting into proper relationships, that was more or less the exact opposite of such a thing. Secondly, he was starting to get pretty damned offended with the accusations Hux throw at him, making him sound like the type of shithead that would just use others, without a single concern for them; it almost made him sound as bad as Mike. Fuck.

He sat up, in the process separating himself from the ginger, and glared down at him. “If it’s so fucking bad, then you don’t have to do any of it; suit yourself,” he spat out, evidently offended and somewhat hurt. “I don’t need to deal with your fucking pity train, either you want it, or you don’t, and you can have it, because I-...-...” What Was he going to say? He stopped himself for a moment, looking somewhat taken aback. What was the best answer to that, even? It was surprisingly difficult to put his own desires into words. At last he growled and looked away, “... you’re kinda hot when you’re not being a pretty fucking brat…” He had no idea why it became harder to look at Hux, rather, it felt like he should glare at the other as per usual, normally he would just stare at the other, searching for confirmation. Further, he was absolutely certain that he just said ‘petty fucking brat.’

 

 

[Hux]  
He first thought that he had ruined it all. All his anxieties and the confused emotions had pushed Ren away from him, made the teenager removed himself from him and sat up. Even he could see that the other was hurt by his words, and it did cause the ginger to feel even worse about the things had had thrown at the other.

“...Is it really so unreasonable of me to want some clear answers, in case I am misunderstanding things here?” He avoided the other’s eyes, turning his face somewhat to the pillow. He then remained silent until the other had finished his rambles, revealing to Hux that he was attracted to him, even more so since he had accidentally called him a ‘pretty’ brat. That… was kind of… Bloody charming; he had to admit that much. Then Ren found it hard to look at him… Did this mean that he really could have him? Did it really mean that the other teenager wanted him?

Fine. He would take the risk. Ren couldn’t possibly be any worse than his first time had been. He would attempt to be seductive, attempt to make Ren want him as much as he kind of wanted the killer whale right about then.

Hux moved up on all fours before crawling over to the other’s lap where he glanced at the other’s face before moving in to place a kiss on his cheek. “So then, if it’s up to me to decide if I want it or not… That means I can have it if I say so, right?” He waited to see if Ren looked at him and then continued. “I… am sorry for what I said. This must be the one time I will actually say that I am sorry, and mean it… Either way, you say you are attracted to me? You’re actually, really, attracted to me?” He leaned in further, trying to hold the other’s eyes. “Would you be able to prove that, Ren? With more than just words?” He almost thought that the other could hear his heart trying to escape his ribcage.

 

 

 

[Ren]  
How on Earth was it that a shithead like Hux somehow managed to press the right buttons and make things okay, just like that? His family never managed that, and they had known Ren all of his life. Most others never managed that, either.

It really was fucking simple; Hux just apologized to him, and acknowledge what Ren was saying, without too much of a drama around it; he acknowledged that Ren was right. When it actually fucking counted, seeing the redhead was a fucking mess and Ren didn’t expect anything but the mess of a redhead being dramatic about things, now and then about things, the way he usually acted, he still listened when it fucking counted.

He felt a kiss on his cheek, and turned to look at the other, brown eyes completely fixated on the sight before them, and while he wasn’t being all that expressive, his eyes betrayed that the words had meant something. Further to that, his pupils dilated slightly and his lips parted to draw a somewhat sharp breath. There was a much more pressing matter right of the moment than a so quickly solved argument. Hux was being seductive, and it worked, just fine, and was probably visible in Ren’s eyes. Since when did the brat figure out how to be hot like that? The ginger was taunting him, and the taller teenager let out another somewhat sharp breath, and before Hux even finished the last sentence, he pushed the other over again, tumbling them both over, until Ren was above him, out of habit supporting his own weight, to not crush the man under him. He had always been rather predatory and demanding in nature, if he could have what he wanted, and rarely held back then, meaning that he was right back at making out with Hux, this time much more aggressively, putting the theory of whether those lips would turn even redder to test. More than that, he pressed himself closer to the other, and well, having thought of not much other than being intimate with the other for a while, he was rather erect. Perhaps that was proof enough, hopefully. If there was a smoother way to go about it, that was to be reserved for fantasies and fanfiction, he simply couldn't think of something better, in the heat of the moment. 

He desperately tried to push out the thoughts of the very fact that this was the first time he was doing anything like this in his own bedroom, with his parents still being downstairs. It was-... well he wasn’t embarrassed, at least. Perhaps it felt a little good to be mischievous like it, and it wasn’t very likely that they’d hear anything unless they came snooping to the second floor, which wasn’t very likely, anyway. He knew well, judged by how much his parents could raise their voices without him hearing through a closed door. It wasn’t a problem that they were about to fuck in his own room, hence, he was really confused to why his heart was still racing. That just didn’t make any sense.

The tongue piercing was fucking hot, really fucking hot, like a surprise secret of mischief, that only became visible upon closer exploration, or simply like a secret achievement he had found.

After a while, he rolled over to the side, forcing Hux along with himself to have the other at least a bit on top of him. Right. So. He wasn’t intending to just attack and eat the ginger right up, this was supposed to be the other’s first time, real time that was, the other sure as fuck didn’t count, and thus, he should be a little fucking more considerate. He had to remind himself that Hux was supposed to be more than just dragged along with it all. Hence, he then instead snuck his arms around the other’s waist and pulled him closer, being touchy in a completely different sense, actually feeling the sides and back of the other. Wow… Hux was… thin. Well, it didn’t matter that much, but he was being careful not to go too far and be too touchy right away, although it was a bit of a challenge to remind himself of keeping that control.

He let out a somewhat aroused sigh and spoke up, “proof enough?”

 

 

[Hux]  
He was looking at Ren one second and the next, the world toppled over and he found himself on his back, with an animal on top of himself. Ren was very animalistic when it came to taking what he wanted, truly a man worthy to be called ‘predator-like.’ Hux had never really thought about what type of person he liked, or wanted to be with, but it was clear, judging from the warmth of his own crotch, and how fast his heart was beating, that he was very much into this type of man. Yet, what was so very different this time, compared to the first, Ren was not frightening in the same sense as the shithead had been. Like this, Hux felt like he had control, like he was respected and cared for enough to be allowed to be in control, and that he was much more than an object to have sex with.

When the makeouts ended, Ren turned over and got Hux into a more than comfortable position, half over the teenager’s chest. The ginger laced his arms around him, allowing himself the luxury of cuddling up to him.

A little earlier, it had been more than evident that the black haired teenager was attracted to him, attracted by him, and very erect to that. He wasn’t surprised that Ren was big, it was to be expected judging from his big body, after all. Hux had come to a decision as the other attacked him with kisses and playful grindings, and the way the bigger teenager touched him made him all the more certain of his choice.

Hux opened his red lips as he moved up to look at the other’s face, his own face was flushed but there was no hesitation or regret in his eyes, that seemed to be just as hungry as Ren’s. “I want to do it. With you.” It wasn’t exactly an answer to what had just been asked, but it was more than answer enough to express how he felt.

 

 

[Ren]  
Okay, so uh, he was definitely going to lead this one, all on his own, because his partner of choice had no prior experience, none that counted, and that was fine, really. He just, uh, couldn’t quite recall the last time he had sex with anyone who wasn’t at least somewhat experienced. Besides, Hux’s little exclamation was kinda awkward, but not the deal breaking or too bad kind of awkward.

In Ren’s head, he wanted this to be like in the movies, or books that he had read in his teenage years. He’d grab the ginger and turn him breathless with touches and kisses, sensations of lust leaving them both wanting, and insanely attractively horny. He’d show his classmate all the secrets and great experience he had gained from his lifestyle, and he’d dazzle the other with knowing every bit of how to treat him in every imaginable hot way. Their kinks or preferences would match up perfectly, just like that, and magic would happen, it would be great, and prove just how good and experienced he was, making Hux very grateful for having been with someone like Ren-...

“Alright, so-... how do you want us to do it? You have to be a little more specific.”

Let’s be real, he had no idea how the other teenager preferred things to be, and it would be way better for the two of them, if they actually communicated what they wanted. It was even more important to communicate with someone who was inexperienced; reality isn’t scripted, and he wouldn’t automatically do things the right way, and Hux wouldn’t automatically not have any preferences, or automatically like just any experience, because he lacked experience, that was just purely unrealistic; this wasn’t a movie, or a porn manuscript. He wasn’t going to risk any discomfort for his friend, just because he wanted to live out any of his fantasies, that were the sort of things that ones agreed upon, or learnt to figure out how to experience together, with time.

He still held the redhead, especially then, because he wasn’t about to let Hux escape from important communication, and in an attempt to make it a little less awkward, he pulled the other up even closer to his face so that he could bury himself really close, not necessarily having to have them look each other in the eyes.

 

 

[Hux]  
If Ren hadn’t politely saved him by hiding him, Hux might not have been able to answer that question, at all. Well hidden from the world against the other’s shoulder, his brain figured out ways of working again, allowing him to think.

What did he want? How did he want it? Wasn’t the other supposed to just sweep him off his feet with all his knowledge and awareness of what and what did not feel good? Maybe Ren just wanted him to say embarrassing things out loud? Or maybe this was some sort of therapy? Talking sex therapy… Whatever it was, it just felt wrong to shrug which had been his initial reaction to such a question.

Having spent a very long time thinking about not having sex with a man, despite having spent some nights desperately dreaming about a warm body pressed up against and inside of him, having looked at some porn before throwing the phone away and then repeated the whole process… Hux was very unsure of what he wanted. He did know a few things however, so he opted to start at that point. “...I, uh… want to keep my shirt on. And my gloves.” So far so good, he managed to say something.

“I think I… would like it… from behind, I guess. I… It is the easiest to reach like that, right? And it should feel, you know...uh, good? And, uhm… would you… please be gentle? At least in the beginning?” That was… more than something? He had managed to somewhat paint a picture of how he wanted it. He didn’t mention the fact that he didn’t want to look at the other while doing it, if he did, Hux wasn’t sure he’d ever manage to look the teenager straight in the face outside of this bedroom again. As he thought about not seeing the other, something else hit him, something that he wanted. “I’d… like it if you talked to me too… It doesn’t have to be, uhm, dirty talk but, actually I don’t know what I feel about dirty talk in general… but you know… just… so that I know… it’s… you…” That was harder to say than to admit that he wanted it doggystyle.

 

 

[Ren]  
Given the whole choosing movie ordeal earlier, and Hux’s general neurosis, the other teenager really had expected it to be a whole lot harder to get some kind of specifics out of him. Still, the ginger delivered, after a bit of hiding in embarrassment, well, while still hiding in embarrassment; yeah, it was a really simple checklist to follow really.

It was a bit of a pity that Hux wouldn’t want to undress his upper body, but eh, it wasn’t the end of the world, and forcing people to do shit they’d be uncomfortable with during sex never ended well, he wasn’t even going to argue against that one.

Right, the redhead had, for as long as the other teenager had known him, walked around wearing gloves, but it had taken the change in their relationships the last few weeks Ren to actually consider just how fucking weird and obsessive it seemed to be, rather than being pretentious; uh, okay, most people probably didn’t wear long gloves just to seem posh and be pretentious, the item itself was far too weird. He didn’t recall having asked Hux about it, it was more the sort of thing that one draws some assumption about and doesn’t care enough to ask, normally, perhaps that was a little different now, and he could probably ask, but maybe not right before sex, when the other obviously wanted to wear the gloves. That was more or less in the 101 Guide How Not to Get Fucked; simple logic, really, if you start talking about private shit your partner doesn’t wanna talk about, right before sex, the sex isn’t going to happen. That was more of a ‘late at night post-sex, while cuddling’ discussion.

In all honesty, Ren had been thinking that Hux might as well have strong issues with bacteria, he even had a vague, fucking vague, memory of the redhead stating that to someone once, but he didn’t trust his long term memory about shit he hadn’t paid attention to. Still, he wouldn’t put it beyond his classmate to even have the real phobia, uh, my-something-phobia, Hell he didn’t know. Anyway, it was a discussion for another time.

“‘Kay, I can do that,” he started, rather matter of factly, but then, his lips quirked into a somewhat mischievous smile. He wasn’t going to take anything too far, but the whole thing about doggy style sex obviously wasn’t as clear of an instruction as the whole thing about letting the other remain somewhat clothed. He rolled over on his back, making an effort to push Hux a bit more on top of himself. “I want to start this off with you on top of me, and you will make sure that you won’t get hurt, because I am pretty big, and that we’re not going too fast, then I’ll pound you as much as you want;” he practically purred that last part into the ginger’s ear. Okay fuck, this was fun. He was perhaps a little proud of himself. Just a little.

 

 

[Hux]  
Wait, wait, wait. What did he just say? Hux found himself on top of the other teenager, simply laying on top of him. Being on top of this man really did help in realizing just how big he was, in the sense of being far taller than a normal teenager and, horrible, terribly, attractively, well trained. It became ever more impressive as the other drank and partied a lot, which meant that he was very dedicated in the training to keep his body in this shape. Hux had grown a lot, he was really not much shorter than the other man but like this, his head tricked him into feeling a lot smaller than he was.

Back to what the teenager had actually said; he wanted him to, uh, stay on top? His reasons made sense, and it really was nothing wrong with the position, in fact, it was a very hot one that Hux believed was called cowgirl…? Or was it reversed cowgirl? Why was it even called that in the first place? Girls didn’t exactly ride cows… The less he thought about that name, the better it would probably be.

Either way, there was only one problem with this suggestion of position, that being that he had to look at Ren, and Ren would look straight at him. He had no desire to show himself like… that. Even more so when he thought about having to meet the same eyes everyday at school. Yet… the thought of being on top and in control was incredibly tempting. The other one did have more experience, if the killer whale said that it was better to ride him, with reasons relating to his size, he was probably right.

Hux took a deeper breath and sat up, effectively straddling the other male without trouble, due to the favorable position he already found himself in. If he imagined this from a battle perspective, the higher ground was the best position to find oneself in. It didn’t matter what sort of battle it was, hell, one could have a swordfight surrounded by lava and the person with the higher ground would win, not that someone would be stupid enough to do something like that. He had no idea why he had ended up thinking about something so unrelated to what he was actually doing, so he moved his focus back to now instead. He was on top of the teenager now, moving his hands to Ren’s chest before scooting back to allow himself to stop on top of his very hard member. Hux had very little experience with, dicks, but it did indeed feel big, he had no idea what that would feel inside of him but he ached to find out.

“Fine then.” He tried to recall the few porn videos he had watched where the woman was in this position, and held onto a more dominant attitude. He had no idea why, but it was easier to recall seeing the attitude he wanted to show in someone like a dominatrix than it was to find inspiration in the gay porn he had seen. Hux moved one shoulder back a little, pushing the other forth as he looked down upon the teenager under himself. He did find that he did enjoy looking down upon him like this. The feeling made a teasing smile form on his lips, as he held the teenager’s eyes. “Very well, if that’s what you want, Ren.” This had to be a good time to use his name, right? He said it clearly, not whispering or moaning it, the black haired would have to work for him to be like, uh… that.

 

 

[Ren]  
There had been this, albeit vague, suspicion he had about Hux, and his preferences. The ginger had always seemed to like when he got to decide, and he was in control of situations; at the very least, he cared a lot more than Ren ever did about controlling situations. It wasn’t just that, it sort of felt a whole lot damn safer to let Hux do things at his own pacing.

“It is,” he confirmed, bucking his hips softly up against the other. The position was squeezing him enough to turn more sexually frustrated than he would have believed would happen. Maybe it was because the ginger seemed to adapt to taking charge very easily, something which did not actually surprise the teenager below him all that much. Maybe it was in the way the other presented his arguments in school debates, or his general attitude when he thought he was in control, or simply other vague little hints in their every day, but it sort of… suited the other to take charge and decide, and as long as it was on fair terms, Ren really didn’t mind, it meant he would have less to worry and care about, and had more of a chance to not think and enjoy himself.

He used the weight of the body on top of him to heave himself up, just enough to pull his shirt off, unlike his classmate, not being one bit shy about showing his body to the other. It was pretty much something he had forced himself to get used to, in his older days. Most of his childhood, and his younger teenage, he had been a lot more bothered with just how big he was, tall and well… with general strange proportions. He didn’t exactly like his own lips, or his nose, or his general facial features, he didn’t mind his hair though. He was also in the sort of body type that if he was anything than as well trained as he could possibly be, people would immediately think of him as overweight, while he simply was big due to his proportions and height. It was natural, and it wasn’t the whole reason he had been working out; he also found is a stress relief when he couldn’t sleep, usually waking up far too early in the mornings, having to pass time. Right then and there, he was rather proud of having worked out as much as he had, the past two years.

He bucked his hips up again, playfully, and found balance by putting his arms down behind himself, to support sitting up, with the other on top of him. “Lube and condoms, and well, other things, are stuffed in a box under the bed, we probably should get those first, don’t be too eager,” he said, smiling, breathing on the other’s chin, “and I can’t undress with you on top.”

 

 

[Hux]  
Ren was undressing.

Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa.

'Be calm, Armitage Hux,' he told himself, and then immediately thought of slapping himself for using his hated first name towards himself. It was the equivalent of stabbing oneself with one’s own knife, the rusty one, for extra painful effect. Ren was still undressing in front of him, pulling his shirt off, which of course revealed his chest, and causing Hux to simply stare at him.

It was only when the other teenager buckled his hips that he remembered to function again. He slid off the other, making sure that their crotches rubbed against one another on his way down. “Well then, if that is what has to be done, I suppose I shall bow myself to the higher power.” He chuckled as he observed the other with a predatory hunger. If Ren was a giant monster bear or a wolf (he’d probably love to be compared to one!) Hux was much more of a smaller predator, but one that liked meat all the same.

He did not take his eyes off the man as he undressed, he wanted to observe every part of it and see all of his body. Hux found that he very much liked what he saw, even more so when the other moved and the muscles flexed under his skin. He didn’t make any efforts to undress until Ren had bent down and was doing something with that, uh… black box under his bed. True to his words, he only removed his pants and socks, before throwing them over to the computer chair.

As he watched the other move about under the bed, seemingly having a little hard finding what he looked for, Hux made the decision to remove his own underwear before the other male did. He pushed them aside and sat down again, so that it wouldn’t be as clear that he had gotten them off.

Ren laid back down on the bed, giving the ginger enough room to move closer, as he laid down on his shoulder with an arm around his chest, now, when everything was so close, he felt nervousness and shame build inside of him, thus hiding against the other’s neck in an attempt to assure himself that the other teenager wasn’t, well… a bad choice of partner. “...You will be careful, right…?” He finally mumbled out against the other’s skin. “I don’t even know if I’m clean… I- I’m not nervous just… just thinking that… maybe you… might get dirty and if you do, I...am sorry…”

 

 

[Ren]  
Yeah, he had pretty much been right about not feeling the slightest ashamed or self-conscious in the presence of Hux. He had no real basis to why his mind kept reassuring him that everything was fine, because it was ‘just Hux;’ maybe there was a world somewhere where he held so little respect for the young man that he simply wouldn’t care about anything the other saw of him, because the ginger hadn’t warranted all that much behaviour to which would make him that trustworthy. Right of the moment, he was just slightly above, well, about everyone else, on the whole trust-list.

He found condoms and lube, thinking that would be more than good enough for a first time, really. No toys, no tools, and definitely nothing experimental when dealing with such a nervous mess as his classmate. Besides, even if he wouldn’t want to admit it, he was already nervous as it was, himself.

It became a Hell of a lot more real when the ginger decided to lay down and cuddle him close, Ren being entirely naked at that point, and well, at least he felt excited. For a brief moment, he realised that he had assured his mother that Hux wasn’t anything like that to him, and that they were just friends…. Well, he hadn’t lied, it just had implied that they wouldn’t do such a thing as this; oops? He really couldn’t give a shit there.

Hux decided to ramble nervously, and his best response, at first, was to put an arm around the other and stroke his back softly. “Yeah, it might be, but it’s not the end of the world, it’s half the reason people are sanitary enough to use condoms. Trust me, it’s normal.” It was normal, it was the truth. Whoever imagined that anal sex was always clean and perfect, like in the stories, had obviously never experienced it themselves, and obviously had unrealistic expectations. It really wasn’t as disgusting as some people imagined, it was just important to have at least napkins present.

As he spoke those words, he let his hand wander lower, pulling his shoulder down as well, to make sure to reach, then finding that Hux had already removed his underwear, and with a predatory grin grabbed a good hold of the other’s butt, letting his hand closely inspect it. He let his hand slide down further, closer, and closer to the opening, massaging the skin and touching the other softly. It felt… like a good start, nice and calm, and making sure that the other wasn’t flailing about all too much, or getting cold feet. He once more leaned in and captured the ginger’s lips, before he drew his hand back again, and lodged himself up on his elbow enough to open the bottle of lube and pour some out on his fingers. He then leaned back again, making sure he closed the bottle again, seeing they tended to be thrown about in the bed during sex, and often leaked unless closed, and then reached behind the other. Back in the same position where he was holding the ginger in his arms, he now reached down to let the finger press inside the other, carefully so, starting to probe and move just carefully. They had all evening, all the time in the damned world, and he wouldn’t go any faster than Hux wanted it.

 

 

[Hux]  
Of course it was natural… it was just beyond embarrassing to even consider the side effects or the aftereffects of accidents happening. Yet, when Ren mentioned condoms, Hux had a realization that the first time hadn’t actually involved anything like it. An immature part of his mind ended up hoping that it meant that the other man involved had actually gotten dirty from it, luckily, his thoughts trail was interrupted almost directly after he had thought the first thoughts, as a big, warm hand grabbed a handful of his butt.

Hux heart ended up racing away from him, he looked up and saw the shark grin that he had come to associate with the other teenager, a grin that quickly prompted him to hide, alongside a very strange noise. Hux would find that he had a strange affinity for making mysterious noises, when he was nervous and aroused, something that he for the moment only counted as strange, and rare, occurrences.

Ren pulled his hand away and moved about somewhat, leading to the ginger glancing out from his bangs to see what the other was up to. When he had confirmed the addition of lube, he went back to hiding, uhm-..., resting against the other’s shoulder, one of his arms moved around Ren’s body for further, well… comfort.

The hand returned to his butt and then towards his opening, it suddenly hit him that Ren had very big fingers, at least when compared to himself, what if it didn’t fit? What if it fit too well? Would Ren think of him as a whore if he was too open? Probably not but what if? The finger came into contact with the anus and after some gentle pressure, it slid right in, causing the smaller teenager to gasp. He had tensed up a little during the racing thoughts that passed through his head, which lead to his body feeling somewhat uncomfortable with the intrusion. There was a vague, burning feeling that he admittedly was more accustomed to, thanks to a toy that he kept very well hidden from everyone in his household. It had been nerve wracking enough to just buy the darned thing, Hux did not want to think of the ramifications of the discovery of said item.

Ren waited for him to relax enough so that he could continue, something that the ginger finally managed to convince his own body to do. The feeling became easier and easier, the burn turned into simple pleasure, and soon enough, he was moaning weakly into the other’s neck, pressing himself closer for further comfort. A traitorous part of him wanted to remove his shirt, and wanted to experience the other’s skin against his own, but he pushed that thought away as if it had burnt him.

The spreading continued, more fingers were added as he curled close, attempting and failing to hold back the pleasured noises that left his throat and lips. For the longest time, he just laid there, enjoying himself, enjoying being touched and filled by the fingers. They probably didn’t really have to continue for the amount of time that they did, yet the feelings that it woke in the ginger made him reluctant to tell his partner that he was ready. He was so very content right there.

When he thought that, he glanced down and found that Ren’s erection was in full view, and it was just as hard as he himself was. The sight of the other’s arousal made him forget how enjoyable this was, immediately causing a hunger for the main course instead. “...I’m… more than open enough… by now.” He mumbled out. The fingers were removed from inside of him as Ren reached for the napkins. While the black haired teenager wiped his fingers, the ginger reached for the lube. He only lightly touched the other’s dick before moving back to allow the other space to pull on the condom, Hux got the feeling that they both shared the awareness that the ginger would probably take a lot longer, and not be nearly as efficient in the application of the item.

This shouldn’t be so hard… in theory. Actually, it might even be easier than with a toy, seeing as this was higher up and attached to something. Even if that something was alive… and throbbing…. And big… He found that he had stopped to just stare at the other’s member, with his own fingers covered in lube that he intended to apply to the dick in front of him. Hux regained his awareness of his task and proceeded to do it, coating the digit and moved himself on top of the other. It was a lot easier to aim when one had a foot down in the mattress while standing on a knee. It was certainly interesting how one’s desire for something could ease nervousness, as he found himself determined to know exactly what the big dick would feel like, when entering him.

First, he allowed himself to grind back, locating his own entrance and where the head of the member was, after that, he reached behind himself to gently guide the top towards his anus. They found each other and ever so slowly, Ren entered him. The head was always the thing that took the most effort to enter inside oneself, the rest simply followed. Hux gasped as the head sunk inside, the rest following a tad quicker than the ginger had planned, meaning that he nearly fell, because he was still pushing himself downwards, and he was very open. The gasp turned into a moan as their bodies quickly ended up in direct contact with each other. He had not, definitely NOT been ready for, or aware of, the fact that he could manage to have the man balls deep inside of him the first time. It was something he would never have been able to do if he hadn’t been so well acquainted with the toy at home.

It felt beyond amazing to feel a warm, big member inside of him, so good that his head was spinning and his mouth falling open to whimper in delight. Hux had closed his eyes when he had made the head enter himself, only focusing on relaxing as well as the task at hand, now, when he was finally filled with, well, Ren, he managed to open his eyes. He found that the menace was looking up at him, eyes slightly glazed over with pleasure. The reality of what they were doing, of what he was really, actually doing hit him, and of course, he almost thought he would faint with embarrassment and shame. He brought his hands up over his face, hiding from the person that was currently inside of him.

Instead of hearing any words from the other teenager, he felt the other’s hands move over his own thighs and up to his hips, before a gentle little buckle of Ren’s hips caused him to almost fall over with pleasure. The bucks continued, small and gentle until Hux removed his hands and relocated them to the other’s chest, sitting a tad bent forward on his now lover. He wasn’t looking him in the eyes or even his face, instead staring at his shoulder. “...You call that sex…? I was expecting a little more from the school’s famous menace.” A sneer moved over his lips as he lightly flicked the other teenager’s nipple, finding comfort in pretending to be in charge and to demand things, instead of being the lost dog that he was.

 

[Ren]  
If there truly was something worth commenting on, Ren had to admit to himself that he never imagined having sex with Hux would be this, uh, endearing? Romantic? Intimate? There wasn’t any real word for it, at least not one he could think of right there and then, that wasn’t hinting too much on emotional and cliché romantic types of situation, which wasn’t really what their situation was, simply gestures of similar category. Besides, he hadn’t imagined having sex with Hux, in the past, or so he wanted to think.

He obviously didn’t mind it, and really, having the other teenager pressed up close against him, in such a, well, uh, cute manner, was both exciting and endearing. It felt good; complicating it further than such a notion was just bothersome and unnecessary. This was all good, and he didn’t need to dwell on the intimacy, creating a strange emotional part of this that just, well, no he would still claim that he was just aroused by it, definitely.

Luckily, Hux was decently clean, making sex without all that much preparation, well, before stretching the other out and this cuddly little foreplay they were partaking in, more than possible. A little deeper, inside the other, when the taller teenager had pushed two fingers rather deep inside, there was this slight sensation of grime against one of his fingertips, but honestly, it was so little it couldn’t matter, really. A wonderful thing about lubrication, was, after all, that it made just anything slip off the fingers too, and not even smell would remain after he came to the point of pulling the fingers out, and dried them off at a napkin, upon being told that the ginger wanted to proceed.

Funny, he had almost gotten too comfortable. The scenario was so far from anything Ren would have imagined that he would prefer during sex. It wasn’t how he wrote the stories in his head, and most certainly not how he participated in sex usually, not this closely and sweetly, but it was honestly the best for Hux, he believed. He had made an unspoken promise to be the best that could be offered, to said young man, after all. Besides, Hux was right about probably being more than enough prepared, at least physically, at that point.

His mind nearly zoned out in the next ‘in between’ moment in the sex, it wasn’t exactly like those things were usually described in stories. Still, it was a part of the whole, as Hux moved off him, teasingly but seemingly shyly touching his erection just once. What the Hell, it was hard to tell if the other was teasing him or not. Besides, his heart clearly skipped a beat upon being touched, even lightly. Fuck that was, new…? If he had to admit it, maybe just a little nerve wrecking, but so little that it hardly mattered, and he would not focus on such a distraction. Instead, he reached out to grab, and then put on, the condom. Right then, when he looked up, he found the other teenager just staring at his dick; it definitely did not make him any nervous or conscious, not at all, not one bit, and he was about to give a bit of a teasing reminder to the other, but wasn’t quick enough before Hux finally decided to touch him. He was still on his back, and upon seeing the other climb up above him, feeling the grip around his erection, he simply let himself relax back into the mattress and pillows, heart hammering in his chest, for unknown reasons. The ginger seemed to handle the whole ordeal of getting the erection inside of himself perfectly fine, meaning that the other teenager should truly just enjoy himself, and enjoy the sensation that followed when the other sank down on top of him, surprisingly easily and fast-... Hux probably had some experience, clearly not with someone else, just with something. Fuck, it felt good; his lips parted into a nearly inaudible gasp, or perhaps even more of a sharp breath. He had shown a somewhat surprised expression, mostly over the fact that Hux just took in all of him like that, so very quickly, but then again it didn’t matter, it seemed, because the other wasn’t looking at hi-... their eyes met, because Hux suddenly gazed down at him.

Ren was damned lucky that the teenager above him was a neurotic mess, and much more nervous than anything he himself could be.

Fuck, he really was doing this, huh. He was having sex with someone he wouldn’t be able to remove from his life, if there would really be any too bothersome consequences of it, for at least another year. Better or worse yet, he-... liked the whole level of intimacy it brought upon him. It wasn’t that he wasn’t intimate or close to any of his friends, or hadn’t been with anyone he ever slept with, it was just different. The high schooler Ren wasn’t the one stirring the wheels out in public, he kind of wanted to separate them, stupid as it sounded when considered. It just, distanced himself from his own actions, his home and the frustrations of his life. Part of him felt like the teeanger and high schooler hadn’t ever really had sex, at least not in years, and now that he was, it was exciting and slightly terrifying.

He really was a fucking idiot, giving Hux all this power to get to him and hurt him, not to mention blackmail material into his life; it seemed the proclaimed menace completely forgot that said statement was a two way street.

Alright, back to blowing Hux’s mind… or not, that was just silly, even if the teeanger in him still wished it to be the case. He felt a bit of an uncomfortable lump in his throat for a moment, realising all too damned quick that there was absolutely nothing he could think of saying to Hux to calm him down about it. He just, didn’t know what to say to the other. He knew his classmate, sure, but like, there was nothing that wouldn’t just be stupidly obvious or annoy the teenager. Hence, an approach of distracting the teenager from the distress with pleasure seemed a lot more appropriate, and damn, he was right.

That was good, given that he was also a bit nervous and it was interfering with his focus on the situation at hand. It felt mind blowingly good to be inside the other, but half of that was the whole arousing context, slightly decreased by the distraction of nerves-...

_“...You call that sex…? I was expecting a little more from the school’s famous menace.”_

Oh. Well then.

Hux just fucking challenged him, and if he wanted a demonstration, a demonstration he would have.

There was a flicker in the brown eyes of the taller teen, one that some would describe with madness, others with glee, but at least, it was evident as Hell that he was about to rise to the challenge; if nothing else, the grin that spread over his lips was probably a clue. Nerves were forgotten, he was going to show this prick how could he could make him feel, just from that very angle.

Seeing that his hands were already all over Hux’s thighs and hips, having moved about to gently touch the other, he instead sneaked the hands around the outer side of the thighs, until he had a sufficient grip on the underside, allowing him to pull the other up on his legs more, but not far enough to slide out of him, no no, this would be better. Right after, he contracted his legs to be able to put his feet into the mattress, giving him much more ability to, if only ever so slightly, move and raise his hips more and faster, and without further warning, he pushed into the teenager harder, trusting Hux to complain if it was too much. There really wasn’t much needed to make that angle intense, aside from a lot of physical effort on his counterpart, only pushing the other a few inches upwards, giving more room for faster and harder movement, was more than enough to make it intense. He wasn’t going to spare any effort, when the twat was mocking his knowledge and experience.

 

 

[Hux]  
A small part of him was somewhat worried that the challenge would rub the other teenager the wrong way, somehow capable making him angry enough to not want to proceed with the act. Hux could not tell why he had a constant, perhaps even illogical, fear that he might upset his partner enough for the other to not want him any longer, it felt far too silly and illogical for him to have been that affected by his one time sex with the guy called Mike for that to be the reason. Now, anyone that observed the situation from the outside could have told him that it was not silly; things did not have to happen over and over for someone to be traumatized by them. If people that once had an uncomfortable experience with a dog could remain frightened by them for ages to come, or in a more extreme example, someone that had once been threatened with a gun and came out of it fearing and loathing them in the aftermath, were allowed to have their phobias and problems, so did a teenager that experienced a bad sexual encounter.

Either way, that fear was simply blown away as he saw the look in Ren’s eyes. It was a light that was hard to describe, but one that made his stomach feel like it had been lit on fire, one that made his legs weak, even as he sat like a queen on a throne. Despite his inability of pinpointing it, the look aroused him to no end, making everything just feel so much easier compared to before.

Hux felt himself being somewhat lifted up, causing a sudden fear of the other teenager falling out of him, which in turn made him clench up a little more than needed to make sure that Ren did in fact not leave from inside of him. His partner shifted around, and Hux, who had seen enough porn to at least know what the other’s movements were sure to lead to, relaxed to make sure the next steps wouldn’t hurt him. It was a bit more instinctual than it was planned.

Then… oh then… Ren started to move, no, pound into him. It got overwhelming ridiculously fast. The fast, deep movements drew such noises from his lips that he had no idea his vocal cords would even allow. It was… so good. There was just a tad bit of pain but in a strange twist for his own mind, he found that he didn’t mind it in the least. It wasn’t painful enough for anything to be wrong, anal sex simply had a little bit of a more ‘painful’ side-effect before the anal ring relaxed. Before it became too much for him, the pain just seemed to disappear and be replaced by pleasure. It was intense but never too much and never too hard.

It didn’t take long before he felt something on his lips, realizing that he was, in fact, starting to drool from the pleasure that was pounded into him. With a strange noise, he tried to hide it behind his hand, simultaneously wiping it away, almost falling off his partner in the process. He regained his balance, mostly thanks to Ren, and the pleasure turned as intensely good once more. For a few seconds, he lost what little control he had over himself and accidentally let slip exactly how good the other felt inside of him, in a string of barely understandable words that repeated at least thrice that it “felt so very, very good…” And that Ren “s-s-shouldn’t stop…”

 

 

[Ren]  
Now that was an effort well rewarded, and what was so fucking attractive about it was the fact that he knew the prissy brat, that was Hux, would never on purpose try to make a show of how good he was feeling, especially not in front of his classmate. What would be hotter than actually winning, in a game where there would be no bad consequences, and no one would receive anything but pleasure, and Ren would feel the extra pleasure of being smug over it in the future; the answer was rather simple, very few things were as attractive to him. Consensual, fun challenges, for two people to enjoy were very fucking important to him. Mostly because he had spent a long time, by then, in crowds where a lot of people had, especially early on in their years, had very negative experiences, and there was a lot of fucked up shit going on. He just, wasn’t going to be any of that, never. There were a lot of levels of messed up in his life and his head, but that just wasn’t one of them.

Maybe there was some grand purpose, or proper explanation that he couldn’t get those things out of his head, while having sex with Hux, but it left him none the wiser to any such reasons still. He didn’t feel like he needed to justify being good enough for the other, at least not consciously.

While he might have been very focused on the pleasure he was giving the other, the sex still felt good, more than good really. While it was true that he had decided to fuck the other deeper and harder, the position at hand didn’t allow for very deep, at least not in comparison to some angles where the force of gravity would aid him, and his aim would be different. It still allowed for a fair amount of movement, making the friction intense and for a great motivation to continue to move.

Ren was starting to draw sharp breaths, panting softly, while he decided to abide Hux's, so sweetly announced, wishes of him to not stop, he could continue a bit longer, although, he was starting to feel the strain of such an exhausting position. Even for someone who works out irregularly but often, it would sooner or later start becoming straining, like too many sit ups in a row. Still, he gritted his teeth together, and forced himself to move further, determined to make the ginger forget that he was drooling altogether, this time. Until, at last, he pushed the other teenager down on his dick, and pulled his upper body a little closer, making it easy to tilt them both to the side on the bed, refusing to move out of Hux while doing so.

Stories often forgot what a great effort sex could be, and just how much of a workout it was, as well. He was nearly strangely turned on, lips parted and breaths escaping in the shape of soft panting, catching his breath for a moment. In stories, sex wasn’t exhausting, which was borderline ridiculous when one thought about it. No matter position, the person moving would sooner or later have energy drained from it, and it required further determination to continue, rather than just being turned on, determination to make them both feel good, and not stop. Besides, he had to stop, if only momentarily, now and then, or he would just reach an orgasm very quickly, which wouldn’t give him any advantage in their little contest.

He looked at Hux for a moment, curious eyes gazing over the mess he had made, very content over the result, and then, he leaned in for another kiss, wanting to do at least something while he was breathing like he had just had a workout session.

Then, he leaned his upper body back a little, pulling himself back enough to angle himself a little better, and with a new grip on the redhead’s waist, he started moving again, slower, and with the ability to hit deeper. This was one of the best lazy positions there was, and allowed for a lot of freedom in movement, even if it wasn’t as overwhelming as being taken from behind, and yes, he hadn’t forgotten the other’s request, he was getting there, sooner or later; he was just busy proving a point.

 

 

[Hux]  
Ren was able to quickly make him forget that he was drooling, by simply continuing to move as intensely as before. He was so lost in his own emotions and the pleasure that he did not notice how out of breath the other teenager had gotten until he was pushed down, and Ren rolled them both over to the side. The position ending up being rather similar to the one they had just left, although the two of them were now laying on the bed instead, one of Hux’s legs under and one over the other’s hip. The flip had made him a little disoriented, but the cold covers felt refreshing and pleasant against his heated face.

Hux opened his eyes, eyes that had been long since shut to enjoy the pleasure that was offered to him in such great amounts. The normal him would have been mortified to find himself in this much of a mess, but the person that looked up at the other teenager, with eyes wet from overabundance of delightful emotions, was smiling rather honestly. It wasn’t a big smile, but it might have been the most honest one he had ever given another person. Ren moved closer for a kiss, one that he was granted with a very small chuckle, as Hux moved to let his gloved hand lightly stroke over the man’s outer arm. “You’re a beast, Ren.” The ginger mumbled, softly, as they both leaned back from each other and the thrusts turned soft, both of them needing a break from the previous pace.

Hux turned his head away from the other, pushing his nose into the covers, that were still cold and refreshing. It became even more evident when he had a person inside of him compared to when he only had the knowledge from the toy, but it was not always the most pleasurable to have anal sex fast. As a matter of fact, the slow, deep and gentle movements that pushed the head so deep and then pulled it back again, allowing him to truly take in and feel every little bump of the other’s member, currently felt even better than a faster pacing.

The ginger ended up pressing his face further down into the mattress, as he was slowly and gently fucked. He couldn’t resist any longer, even if he had tried to not do it, in fear that it might be some sort of insult to his partner, he couldn’t resist his urge to touch himself. Hux was under the misconception that if you touched yourself during sex, it was a proof that the partner wasn’t doing a good enough job in pleasing you. There was no such thing. If one wanted to add more pleasure by touching or using extra toys to easier reach a climax, there was nothing wrong with it. Everything that added to a person feeling good during sex was generally a good thing, there was nothing wrong with it.

The gloves did make it a tad less pleasurable, but not enough for him to be all that bothered by it. He allowed his fingers to move around the shaft, directly causing him to tense up slightly. He moved his hand as he let out a relieved moan into the sheets, his leg curling around the teenager’s back to keep him from moving too far away. It was a little silly, but it felt good to be a tad… possessive.

 

 

[Ren]  
The newfound pacing made it all the easier to not come just yet, not that it would have mattered that much, Ren simply had gotten into his head that he would prove himself to Hux, and then, that was the only thing he would allow. Besides, he would have to admit to himself that the nearly painful urges he was starting to get to climax inside of the other felt like it was melting his mind.

Further, the position allowed for him to actually look at Hux, more than it had when he was focusing on fucking the other senseless.

Part of him felt like nothing in the world could have prepared him for seeing the ginger looking so… happy. He didn’t fuck virgins, it just wasn’t a thing, normally, mostly because he was never the same age as the person. Eh, maybe someone had lied to him along the line, but no one had acted as obviously as a virgin; Hux was making it unbelievably obvious that the scenario meant the world to him, and disturbingly, surprisingly, it tugged more at Ren’s heart strings than it made his dick twitch; well, the latter was still happening. It seemed this evening would just keep him experiencing terrifying little things. Terrifying and exciting, making him feel giddy and passionate about his success, there sure was some magic in that.

Their eyes kept contact after the kiss, and the black haired teeanger was honestly surprised that Hux wasn’t shying away, he even managed to look seductive, making the taller teeanger wonder if the other was doing it on purpose. It honestly didn’t matter, because Ren had already found that he really had a liking for making those red lips even redder, and the little…. Taunt? Insult? Compliment? Well, whatever it was, he grinned, baring his teeth for a second, with a bit of a growl, hardly even sexy, but it honestly didn’t matter; it was just Hux.

‘It was just Hux’ was starting to become something a little unique, puzzling to figure out how exactly, but it was starting to be something valuable, rather than a way to explain there weren’t any stakes.

There wasn’t much that was beastly about the following pacing of action, but it felt really good. The ginger was tight around his erection, and when the other got about to the business of touching himself, that just got a little twitchier and tighter, and it was something Ren could feel, from the, very warm, inside. Somewhere far in the teenager’s back of the head, he wanted a better word for the addicting and attractive image of the ginger jerking himself off, with Ren buried balls deep inside of him, than simply hot. Maybe there just wasn’t need for any elaborate expressions, it wouldn’t change the experience, and it wouldn’t take away any of the charm.

Still, something bothered him a little, and before he could even think about it, the proclaimed beast reached out to sneak between the gloved hands and the erection, smiling subtly. It made sense, really, aside from him wanting to make an effort to make the ginger’s experience even better, it just made sense to not get the gloves dirty. Similar to that one time he had corrected Hux’s makeup, he simply took over, as if it was the most natural thing in the world, and well, to him it was. He wanted to drive Hux over the edge, after all.

It was somewhat easy to tell when he was driving the ginger over the edge, the muscles tensed up, made it even tighter and it seemed Hux couldn’t help but to try to push back against the dick inside of him, in small and erratic, nearly twitchy, movements. It wasn’t controlled, and that itself was the biggest indication, as if, for a few seconds, the body was so needy for a climax, there simply was no conscious control. Well, in response to all of it, Ren continued until the other came, increasing the pacing of just everything for a moment, making a very conscious effort to increase the pleasure for the other. Seeing the other in euphoric pleasure was… nevermind, let’s just, not go there. They weren’t even dating, it was starting to get a little weird; he was mostly doing this for Hux’s sake.

He let the other’s world calm for a moment, before he started moving with a faster pacing, just for a while, until he came inside the other, that wasn’t as hard, and it felt a relieving kind of euphoric that was hard to explain, but it took away all bothers, anxieties and worries, and simply made his mind feel a comfortable kind of slightly docile.

He did pull out of the other rather quickly, mostly to as cleanly as possible be remove the condom rather quickly, seeing it was rather easy to avoid the sheets when he was still hard. The teenager didn’t need to leave his bed or the position for that, he simply covered the condom up in a few napkins and threw it into the bin next to the desk, being lucky enough to hit, not that it would matter very much. For the sake of cleanliness and less risk of breaking the condom, it would be better to change into a new one, if he was going to continue, and take Hux from behind, the way the ginger had requested of him.

“Want more?” He asked, knowing that while communication was as important as ever, the redhead probably wanted to keep it to a minimum. Besides, people didn’t always want the same thing, once they were into it. The human body was unpredictable, and sometimes it was enough, and sometimes it wanted something different than what had initially been suggested or requested, meaning that people should never try to force others to uphold things they had suggested before starting, just because ‘they said so,’ that simply wasn’t how sex worked, and it would then stop being enjoyable.

 

 

[Hux]  
The ginger was not expecting the other’s hand to come and buff his own away. He looked up from his hiding place in the covers, to glance at Ren with a somewhat nervous lump in his throat. Had it really been something wrong to touch himself? Was Ren so focused on making a borderline virgin come with only his dick that he wasn’t allowed to touch the dick? The lump was quickly dissolved and changed to excitement instead, as the beast had taken it upon himself to pleasure him instead. A small noise between a laughter and a snort left his lips as he allowed the teenager to control his pleasure.

Hux leaned back and closed his eyes again, to fully take in the feelings that Ren gave him. It felt somewhat weird, Ren did not know all of his spots or the way he liked to be touched the most, it look a little while for him to get it right, or right enough so that he wasn’t too distracted by the almost perfect handjob he was getting. Ren’s hips started to move again, allowing the perfect distraction to make him forget that the feeling of someone else’s, much bigger hand, was jerking him off. Together, it very quickly became very, very pleasant.

He ended up making an almost desperate whine, as he was getting closer and closer to coming. When one was on the verge of climax, being overwhelmed by new and exciting things, when it was continuously building up more and more, it was easy to feel desperate for the sweet, ultimate release. The only thing that remained in his head was how desperately he wanted it, how bad he wanted to climax. He wasn’t aware of how much, and how clumsily, he was moving back against the other, he only knew that he absolutely, really, very much wanted to be pushed over that edge.

And he was. With a loud, almost surprised gasp, the climax shook his body, making him curl together as the pleasure combined into delightful trembles. To his great surprise, that was when his bedfellow started to move faster and harder, making sure that the ginger could do little less than make even more low noises and gasps. Then… there was no movement for a while, something that caused the smaller one to sink back against the bed, breathing hard and panting from the aftermath of the climax. It didn’t occur to him that the menace hadn’t had time to come yet, he was far too absorbed in his own emotions to think of anyone else.

Ren was beginning to feel a little too big inside of him but he couldn’t find it in him to complain just yet. Just… a little more and then he would ask him to move ou- Ren surprised him by suddenly thrusting again. He looked up, confused out of his mind as to what in the world was going on. Yet the look on the other’s face was enough to calm him, he looked needy but kind and just a tad careful, which was enough for the ginger to still feel safe, even if it was a little overwhemling in a different sense.

People rarely came at the same time, that was somewhat of a myth that came from porn. It might be truer for virgins, or people that didn’t have all that much sex, as when the receiving end came, their insides became tighter, making it easier for the giving partner to come as well. In reality, the giving part usually ended up focusing on making their partner come before they did so themselves, or came earlier and then continued to move until the receiving end got to come. It was a lot more pleasurable and giving for both partners if the giver came a little later rather than earlier, but it was a very hard balance, where both participants had to take the other in consideration without pushing themselves too far or too little.

Ren reached his climax too and thankfully didn’t remain in him too long, instead pulling out, allowing his butt to draw a sigh of relief from losing the intruder. It had been very pleasurable and overwhelmingly nice to be filled up, but after the climax, the digit had become somewhat less welcome and straining to his anus.

Hux allowed himself to fall back again, pulling his legs away from Ren as the other moved a bit to take off the condom, he hardly moved at all, but it was enough for Hux to reclaim the captured leg. He reached for the tissues to wipe some off his cum off of the covers so that he could lay down. After a quick inspection, he noted that his shirt hadn’t gotten dirtied at all, something that made him very relieved. Ren was looking at him, causing Hux to feel a sudden heat in his cheeks. It dawned on him that he had just had sex, very good, fun and pleasurable sex, with the other teenager, with the high school menace…

“Want more?” Said menace spoke.

Hux, who was sitting on his knees now, looking down at the other teenager, thought about it before he slowly shook his head. This hadn’t ended or happened the way he had first imagined it would, not at all, but his body was more than satisfied with the way things had turned out. What was he supposed to do now… A sneaky, unpleasant feeling moved over him, as he started to feel disgusted with himself for what he had done. For being so desperate, for not holding back any, and for enjoying acting like a wanton whore.

The ginger curled up to the side of the other teenager, with both arms in front of himself and his face hidden against the other’s chest, trying to block out the world and the feelings of disgust towards himself. It felt so unfair, Ren had been nothing but kind, he had made him feel so good, and in response, his mind told Hux that he himself was wrong for doing this with the other teenager. “...I feel dirty… Is that… normal? Can I borrow the shower? Would that be… obvious to your parents then? Damn…” He wasn’t aware of it but his hand started moving towards his wrist, lightly scratching over the fabric.

 

 

[Ren]  
After he laid back down, completely bared to the other teen, it didn’t take long before Hux responded. A no wasn’t that disappointing, they didn’t need to keep going, the ginger’s experience was the most important in the matter, anyway, and they had all the time in the wor-... wait no, that wasn’t right, there was nothing saying that it would become a thing. Ren sincerely doubted that his classmate could handle a fuck buddy, emotionally, which was a pity, really, but eh.

Funny, this really felt comfortable. He would have been a complete madman if he didn’t think that the neurotic teenager in his bed wouldn’t act up at least a little, after them having sex, so it was pretty much expected that the other would be nervous, and well, feel something akin to uncomfortable.

So, uh, right, Hux was feeling a little insecure, but there was something about it that just rubbed Ren the wrong way; it felt very wrong. There had been times he had bad sex, or sex with people he, in hindsight, really shouldn’t have chosen to have sex with, then he often felt disgusted, in some way similar to the way Hux made it sound. However, really good and cosy sex shouldn’t make one feel bad, there something was fucked up, but he couldn’t really make sense of him being the problem; the ginger was obviously attracted to him, and he wouldn’t become a problem anyway.

Still, he had just had an orgasm, it wasn’t like he was about to be annoyed with the other’s behaviour, it was honestly just pitiful. Thus, he put an arm around the other again, softly stroking the back, and buried his nose in the red hair, once more; for the record, whatever hair products the other was using made it smell very good. “I mean, we have school tomorrow; they won’t find it weird that we take showers no. So yeah, you could do that.” As per usual, his voice had that hint of disinterest, and lack of investment, but it probably came off as more relaxed than any such, right then. A tiny smile spread over his lips, and well, a tiny spark of hope in his chest. “I kind of need the shower, too, the shower is big, it’s a whole lot nicer to shower together, and eh, I don’t think they will notice because they won’t bother us.”

Yeah, fine, he’d actually like that, a lot, maybe he was a little hopeful, and perhaps, even just a tad, the slightest bit, nervous.

 

 

[Hux]  
He immediately felt a lot better as he was told that he could indeed borrow the shower; water was always nice for washing away feelings of disgust. The hand that had lightly scratched over his gloved wrist stopped right away, but it was replaced with a different, uncomfortable, throb of worry, as Ren asked if they could shower together. Everything about that proposition was wrong, except the things that made it feel right… Most of it was wrong, though. Yes, definitely wrong. Yet, the thought of not being alone in an unfamiliar house was more than strong enough to give him pause in blurting out a no.

It was, beyond doubt, a bad idea to say yes. He did not want to show his body off that much to the other, not only because it was uncomfortable, he had more reasons than that. Yet, if they were in the shower, he could actually touch the other teenager without the gloves, without having to worry about, well, other things. Besides, if Ren was to get too touchy, he could always ask him to stop. At this point, he actually did believe that the other would be respectful enough to know that a no was a no, and nothing else.

Finally, he nodded in response to the question. “On one condition. The lights needs to be turned off. It has to be completely dark, dark enough that we won’t see each other clearly. I don’t remember seeing a window in the bathroom so that shouldn’t be too hard, right?” The last question was said very authoritatively, it was not as much a question as it was a vague attempt to conceal the demand that had come beforehand.


End file.
